To be utterly pissed off with partner

[Muppet7410]

It's my birthday today. Myself and my partner of 18 years have had our first childfree day since early March and been out for a lovely lunch. When we came home he gave me my birthday presents. They were complete shit - didn't even look at them because I was so annoyed. He built it up as if he had bought me some nice gifts but basically it was some cheap tat to wear in the bedroom and some sort of sex game. This is not the first time he's bought be this sort of gift. I'd buy it as a joke but not as an actual gift. Don't get me wrong i'm not expecting lavish expensive presents but for the one day a year when it's all about me what's wrong with buying me a bottle of perfume or some other generic birthday gift?! I'm fuming!!! And needed a rant!!!

You are not been unreasonable. It sounds like those gifts are for him not for you.

A friend of my dh's is a very rich man..
For his dw's big birthday she got a new Shark vacuum cleaner.....
Order yourself something great op.. And maybe a new patio design book.
Alibi always available here..

god typical!! I'm trying to decide if that's worse than the crappy pair of slippers with bows one ex got me which were too small with the 'smellies' which would blow up my eczema! You rant away OP!

That’s a long time to be with someone for them to not know you wouldn’t appreciate this. Have you ever told him you don’t like gifts like these?

Did he honestly think they were nice? Is he usually bad at buying presents? Context matters as some people no matter how hard they try are terrible at selecting gifts. That’s why the sayings go
“Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth”
And
“It’s the thought that counts”

Tbh I'd have been far happier with a new vacuum cleaner!

It's his birthday in a few days and I've just tried to cancel his present but too late 😤

I didn't even get a f-ing card!

My DH did this once, at Christmas, after I'd give birth to our child 2 months earlier - a tacky nylon crotchless underwear set from Ann Summers, a vibrator, and a sex board game.

I told him in no uncertain terms that these were clearly presents for him, not me, and if he ever bought me shit like that again he would be extracting the vibrator from deep inside one of his own orifices.

The whole lot went back and I bought myself a nice new dressing gown and some cashmere bed socks.

Sell his present on ebay and treat yourself.

That's just awful. Honestly you are together so long but it's as if hes made a beginner's mistake in gift choice.

Oh I’d be livid. Wrap them back up for him for his birthday.

@Wherestheline

Oh I’d be livid. Wrap them back up for him for his birthday.

This and sell whatever you bought fir him any buy something nice for you with it.

What did you say about those horrible presents? No card?

RoadworksAgain Laughed out loud at your post! Hopefully hes learnt his lesson now .OP Seriously WTF is wrong with these Guys?Has he done this sort of thing prev? Tell him in future you will be choosing your own presents thanks very much! and go shopping with him for a new handbag/perfume/boots whatever! Maybe tell him you will be needing a refund and he can come out and buy you something of your choice !

Beachbody 😂😂👌

Give him chocolates and wine for his birthday (save what you ordered for Christmas) and help him eat and drink them

My ex bought his elderly granny a windscreen wiper for Xmas ! She didn't even own a car and I sat there, mortified whilst his entire family opened up all their presents in turn.

Thank god he is an ex.

If he thinks sexy lingerie and a sex game, things which make you more attractive to him, are a reasonable gift I would buy something like a vacuum cleaner for him, after all doing more domestic tasks will likely make him more attractive to you!

What did you order for him? Can you return it and buy him some cleaning stuff, dusters and a mop or something, or an elephant thong and some lynx?

Buy yourself something nice, then show him it and tell him you expect better next time.

i hope you told him what shit they are and that you are absolutely FED UP. I'd have been furious. Is this a sly and nasty dig at your sex life.

Did you tell him you didn't like it?

I got hose pipe connectors, a hose pipe reel and sprinkler for one birthday - I wouldn’t mind but I’d already bought it all weeks beforehand for my garden and he knew that but gave me it anyway as he couldn’t be bothered to take it back. He also bought me a bracelet, the exact same one that is got for the previous Christmas from someone else - he also knew this too

Give him a list. My own shameful list i gave to the ex:

• Smart lights
• A tshirt saying ask me about my ninja and when she lifted it up, it had a ninja face
• the lingerie pitfall (had to do a quick return and apology for that one!!)

Sometimes men run out of ideas and think they are being 'spontaneous' and need correcting as @RoadworksAgain put very well . It can feel like we are being boring getting perfume, clothes/accessories and household every year!

I would see him as a sexually manipulative wanker. I'm surprised he hasn't asked you whether you'll wear your 'presents' for his birthday (yet.)

I'm a firm believer that left to their own devices men buy how they see you. Sexy undies is more flattering than a hoover or whatever even if you'd rather have the hoover.