How many men who claim to be secret agents have you come across?

[twentytwentyvision]

It seems to be a common theme amongst con artists or those who are married and have an extra family somewhere.

I've now heard of 3 or 4 guys who have very confusing and suspicious back stories and explain everything away as they work for intelligence services and can't possibly answer any questions about their whereabouts or why they're not contactable for long periods of time.

I'm surprised to have heard of so many mysterious men claiming to be secret agents. I've seen it a few times here as well - where someone is worried about a friend or relative having got involved with a guy who claims to be a secret agent.

I was wondering how common it is - if anyone else has met a man who's claimed he's a spy - or if a friend/relative has got involved with someone like this. I think it's loosely linked to the works on an oil rig and is uncontactable story which I have also heard of!

Also the interview process is absolutely gruelling. They go through everything in such close detail. I was asked to be a personal reference for a friend who is now a civil servant of some sort in West Africa. He told me that I’d get a phone call at work and it didn’t matter what I actually told them as long as it was true. I was on the phone in my office (luckily I had a private one so no one could overheat) telling a complete stranger that my very good friend had smoked weed on a couple of occasions, once did a shit in a bush and that I couldn’t remember if I’d slept with him because I was very drunk but I had assumed that we’d done something. Luckily our stories tallied. We still don’t know if we slept with each other though.

And not a secret agent but I met a guy on a ski holiday once who a an interesting but slightly unbelievable story.

He was with his wife and me and dh were paired up to sit with them for dinner every night in the chalet so chatted quite a bit. He said he was a deep undercover police officer. Now I’m an ex police cadet and have a lot of police family/friends and in some ways he did give off a police vibe which I’d thought before he said he was police. But he had really long, dreadlocked hair which was (is?) totally against police regulation. So he must have been undercover for years to grow his hair that long.

It was a few years later the stories broke in the press about police being undercover for years with some of the animal protestor/environmental type protest groups and I suspect he may have been one of those.

I've definitely read a few threads on here from friends worried about their friend's new bloke who claims to be a secret agent but is clearly just trying to avoid being found out that he has a family elsewhere...

I know one. But it was true. Only found out what he actually did after years of knowing him. He told me initially he worked in the civil service.

None, anyone who tells you they Are. Aren’t.

However I have met two in real life. A very elderly couple who had retired close to my in laws. They were really fantastic people, very, very outgoing and funny, and told the most hysterical stories about their travels, and shit they got up to in their younger years, I did ask them once what they had done for a living and they just both looked at me silently for a pause, and the women said we were civil servants and wouldn’t expand further, she just changed the topic of conversation and cracked on. Worked out when they had both passed I found out from their family they had worked for the intelligence service and that’s how they met and travelled the world.

I know a fella who is in the army, very low ranking. He claimed to have been headhunted by the royal family to be a bodyguard for a very senior royal (either Prince Charles or Philip, I can't remember which)
He is what's called a 'bloater'. Is genuinely in the army but 'bloats' his position and experiences.
Not sure if it's coincidental but he is also the most immature adult I've ever met.
His shenanigans would be funny if there weren't children involved.

If you actually met someone who worked for mi5, mi6 etc then you would only find out if serious and you'd likely be questioned by a vetting officer for hours. They would not tell you on a first date.

Can't believe some women fall for this crap still.

@Bluntness100

None, anyone who tells you they Are. Aren’t.

However I have met two in real life. A very elderly couple who had retired close to my in laws. They were really fantastic people, very, very outgoing and funny, and told the most hysterical stories about their travels, and shit they got up to in their younger years, I did ask them once what they had done for a living and they just both looked at me silently for a pause, and the women said we were civil servants and wouldn’t expand further, she just changed the topic of conversation and cracked on. Worked out when they had both passed I found out from their family they had worked for the intelligence service and that’s how they met and travelled the world.

Your first line simply isn’t true.

There are situations where you may be allowed to know - eg when you are marrying someone, in a long term relationship or for other reasons required to be told.
The person I knew was a family member and I was put down as their next of kin. And was told at that point.

Why would you talk such rubbish when you are clearly wrong?

According to the Saudi Embassy in London, my DH is in MI5 😳 refused to listen that he clearly isn't so refused his work visa for a dream job.

I often do wonder if there is indeed a MI5 spy with his (common) name and DOB

My friend met one like this. He also 'apparently' had several houses he rented out, a Porsche (that was in the garage when he arrived in his mondeo), she quite liked him and let him string her along for a while. she'd come back and tell me what he'd said next, because she never really pulled him up on it and actually encouraged his bullshit his lies got more elaborate. He'd tell her he was flying into X place and the idiot would leave his location thing on his phone so she could see he was actually in the next town over. We had a bit of fun with him.

None.

However, I do know a now retired spy. He worked for GCHQ and I had to do part of his security clearance so definitely true.

He is and was the most solid, down to earth, quiet family man you could imagine.

To be fair, all his spying was done via distance surveillance, listening in to radio etc, rather than physically sneaking behind enemy lines, but I suspect his type is much more the norm in the secret service / spying world than the swashbuckling or mysterious secretive type portrayed on film or by con artists

One told me that James Bond was modelled on him and I laughed as I thought he was joking - oops. He did not like that.

If someone really was a spy, presumably any good spy wouldn't tell you for ages. Not at first meeting 😂😂

The clue is in the title
My ex of many years did work for mossad. He mentioned it once years into our relationship and refused to give any information, he just said he was like the admin boy and shrugged his shoulders(I know he wasn't!). I think it is far less glam as ppl imagine. We were together for years, I knew never to ask again. He would never divulge anything. My point is he didn't use it as a way to get me and because of his training he'd always remain professional.
As a caveat all young Israelis go into the army so therefore perhaps more people get exposed or asked to work for the secret part of the army.

Men will say anything to get laid

@MondayYogurt

Men will say anything to get laid

*people

One told me that James Bond was modelled on him and I laughed as I thought he was joking - oops. He did not like that.

So quite old then, given the first book was written in 1952?

MondayYogurt

Men will say anything to get laid

*people

The thread is about men who lie to women to try and get them into bed.

It's fine to say men.

None and honestly, I'm gobsmacked women fall for this rubbish.

I know that sounds harsh but really? REALLY? - a guy you just met online feeds you this rubbish and you just blindly believe it? it couldnt possibly be more likely he's just married and thats why he disappears for days at a time? or the fact he asked you for money when youve known him all of 3 weeks and the spy story is simply more "believable" than the fact he's just a regular con man?

Yeah, I dont get it.

I really don't think women generally lie about shit like this to get men into bed. To make friends/sound important maybe. But not to get laid.

JudyGemstone exactly. Women don't really need to lie to get laid. Just being willing and available is enough for most men!

Oops should have said "owners of active biological human sperm dispensery organs"?

Nahhhhh it's men.

No true secret agent....
🕵🏻‍♂️

It's definitely only men who need to lie to get laid - I don't know a single woman who'd need to lie to get sex. Might not be a great looking man or anyone you'd want a relationship with, but if a woman wants sex and is happy with a casual hook up (& doesn't care about looks or location too much) then go out anywhere on a Friday / Saturday night or go on any dating app and she'll get it.

@GemmeFatale

I used to live in Cheltenham. Every other bloke there is a secret agent. The ones who say they are aren’t. The ones who ‘have a boring office job’ might be. 😉

So true, either British intelligence services are both indiscreet and a bit dim...or there are a fair few genuine fake James Bonds running around Cheltenham. 🤣