DH has been working from home for the last 5 months. He rolls out of bed around 8.15am and gets showered to come downstairs for work.
DC is up around 6am but it's always always me up with him. Unless it's a Sunday, when it's my day to have a 'lay in'. Often this doesn't happen because (out of choice as DH reminds me), I'm visiting family 3 hours away.
He doesn't seem to get how bone tired I feel. DC has ASD and is very very challenging. It's like being in the baby stage of a very small toddler yet he's almost 3, with no understanding of basic sentences and non verbal. I love him beyond measure but I am very very tired.
H has a week off and insists it's his week off, so won't do any getting up beyond maybe the Sunday that he has to, if I'm here.
But if I utter a word of protest, he reminds me I'd have a week off too if I had a job 
Yet, I wouldn't. Because I work part time and my annual leave is usually spent doing nice things with DS etc. He says well that's my choice. I lost my job at the end of furlough though and I'm about to start a new one, again PT.
DH insists full time wouldn't work because of all DC's appointments and really he is right, but I just feel if I worked full time then maybe I'd be respected a bit more for the hard work I put in? I mean, how could he refuse to share lay ins if I literally worked the same hours?
If I mention that DS often isn't even here to bother him because I take him out for activities or to see friends and family, he reminds me 'that's my choice'. Without admitting he benefits from having so much time away and peace from DS.
I'm a very house proud woman and yesterday upstairs was spotless but I was due to leave to go out for the day and DC had messed up downstairs (with a few toys and some toast on the floor, with the pillows), whilst I was on the phone to car insurance etc. DH was at the gym and as it was a Sunday, had got up with DS and cleaned downstairs. When he came back upstairs was lovely but downstairs needed another clear up. But I was so busy just getting DC ready and myself, plus phone calls, that I simply couldn't tidy the mess within the 1.5 hours he was gone.
He came back and insisted I do it all again before I leave, because how could I leave him here to do it when he'd already done it? I reminded him of how house proud I usually am but going out for the day trumps that when DC is involved and it would take a very max of 20 mins to sort. He said well do it then. So then I said well he is here ALL DAY relaxing and doing nothing. Whilst I'm out with DC. And dealing with the DC. He said its my choice that I'm out and he didn't ask I go.
I'm so so tired of feeling like I'm breaking myself to do it all. Yet, I feel as if I'm being told very blatantly to my face that I do fuck all 