Need urgent mortgage help

[Help1307]

We are buying a new house and current house is joint (both earned equally until I had DS2). I was doing bedtime with screaming tired DC and DH asked me to sign a paper saying oh it’s nothing just about how house is shared between us. I signed.

Just seen the email he sent to solicitors and opened the attachment which tbh I wouldn’t usually do bc I trust him and it is now saying we are buying as tenants in common - him 80pc and me 20pc.

Wtf does this mean?

If we buy the new house and we divorce - does this override the fact that we have been together 19 years and have 2 DC?

Does it override fact that normally assets would be split?

Or would it mean that if ever we did divorce I really would only get 20pc of house?

I can’t understand why he has done this. I only earn less than him now as went part after second DS. Otherwise for last 19 years we’ve been pretty much equal.

I’m mad and I don’t even know if I should be.

Am I potentially losing money from last 19 years or just extra that would be paid in respect of new house?

Thank you

OP I'm so sorry to read this. I'll add my own story alongside others just to highlight the potential impact this could have on you.

My parents changed their home ownership from joint to TinC (50:50) as part of inheritance tax planning. They both received legal advice on the implications and went ahead in full possession of the facts.

10 years later, my dad had affair which lasted just 6 months, before he died quite suddenly - he and mum were still married when he died. Dad had changed his will to leave his half of the marital home to his mistress, mum ended up having to sell the house and hand over a cheque for £500k to this woman. We spent 2 years challenging the will but to no avail, it was a horrific situation all round.

It over rides everything ! If you leave and want to sell you can't because he owns more of it than you . Basically you haven't got a leg to stand on or a say in anything at all regarding this house . Basically it's kind of not even yours . We are going though this now with a family member and a house left 80 percent to my mother and twenty to my uncle .

Wow how underhand.

This would be a deal breaker for me, I wouldn't trust another word he said.

I would think he's planning on leaving you.
As soon as you get divorced he will walk off with the 80%.

Even if he's not planning on leaving, I would if I was you. He is a piece of shit robbing you like that.

Maybe he should be going the kids bath time from now on!

I can’t think of any reason why you would go ahead with this house sale and purchase and put yourself in a much worse position than you are now. Pull out of it. Think seriously about whether you can stay married to a man who has tried to do this to you.

@edwinbear what a horrendous situation for you and your mother

I'd honestly think he's preparing to split. I'd be looking closer for signs of another woman.

Please don't get swept up in the pressure of moving OP - you'd be an absolute fool to give away your half of everything.

I hope you're okay @Help1307. Thinking of you. Your 'd'H does not have your best interests at heart.

My own mum fully owned her property 100% and had to sell her home and split the proceeds (50/50) with her husband of 18 years on divorce. In the event of a long marriage she was told that any departure from equality was unlikely.

I just thought I would add, they had no children together. No dependants at all. She still had to hand over 50% so if divorce were to happen you would probably be entitled to more than half as you have 2 young children. As for the inheritance..my mum also used a portion of inheritance to pay off the mortgage. This was not taken into account at all once it had gone into a “marital asset”.
I agree though that he has been underhand about getting you to sign this document. If he dies before you, things could be tricky if he’s left his money to someone else.

OP I’m a family lawyer. This is one of the most underhand disgusting things I’ve ever heard. It’s awful. It means that if you separate you’d have to go to family court to fight this. It would show a recent legal intention to own the property in 80/20 shares. His lawyer would be all over it. I’ve honestly never heard anything like it. The greedy devious dick!
Do not under any circumstances go ahead with the purchase. If you own your present house jointly just sell it and set up on your own. He’s tried to do you over legally and to do it without you noticing.
Why does he want to protect his inheritance when you have kids and when you’ve been together 19 years!! The inheritance is family money. People protect their inheritances when the relationship is quite new or in blended families etc.
For me it’s the deviousness. How dare he do that! It’s absolutely shocking and I wouldn’t stay with a man who tried this.

You need to call this off ASAP. Don't go ahead with the purchase and then you've got your 50% in your current house when you split. There is definitely something behind this and I agree he's trying to steal your proportion of the house I assume on the basis you'll split after the purchase. 100% protect you and your ability to provide for the kids - if you split and he gets 80% of the value of the house will you be able to provide a home for the kids or will he go for custody too? This is not a good or decent man.

Jesus. Disclaim it all, tell everyone involved that you retract any intention to do this split. Then get divorced. What heavyweight piece of shit your husband is

@Help1307 I hope you are ok, I am so upset for you!! After 19 years and DC together and he tried to pull such a devious stunt.

Is there any way you can say YOU didn't sign it? Anyway don't go ahead with the purchase of new house. I'm sure you already know this!

I'd suggest you pull out and he can protect his inheritance by you divorcing.

OP, I hope you have decided to protect your best-interests as it's clear he only thinks about himself. He even said..."it’s nothing to do with anyone else that he is just protecting his inheritance"...no thought of wife and kids then?

It concerns me that you consider your contribution less OP, when you are raising his children and providing domestic support. This more than makes up for 1 day less work and 8K less income. If he had to pay for your services - childcare & cleaning alone would cost more!

Please don't support his attitude to money. You are married and parents of children so you are equal and all money should be shared. If you inherited and put it into a property would you do this? I'm guessing not.

This could be totally innocent (& he's not got an ulterior motive), just financial resentment on his part, but I'd be interested to know where your spare money (after bills etc) is going as it sounds like there's a fair bit - has that been as equally attributed?

Jesus this is awful. Even if there was some good reason to do this (I can't think of one), the fact he didn't tell you and sneakily asked you to sign it would be the absolute end for me.
You are married with children so why does he need to 'protect' his inheritence? Does he have plans to split from you soon or something? Surely the children would get it anyway.

Hope your appointment today goes well and helps you make some decisions on what to do x

You poor thing, what a horrible man. I would be so suspicious that he has another woman waiting in the wings and he is intending to leave you very soon.
If you do not buy this house and divorce now you will be much better off. His inheritance money may be considered a joint asset too. I would be very suspicious that he is having an affair, is intending to leave soon and wants to maximise what he walks away with. Regardless, you can’t ever trust him again.

I agree with others who say to sell Ur current property and set up on ur own. He is disgusting, I’m raging on ur behalf. That’s got to be the most underhanded and deceitful things I’ve ever heard, especially the way he made u sign it!!
It sounds like his solicitor has only ur husband’s interests in mind. Very strange.
I would be searching the house for all financial details (probably hidden in the attic!) and wud hire a detective to check if he’s having an affair! So sorry this is happening to you but I’m relieved that u found out now rather than later. He’s an utter snake

Just thinking - did the Deed of Trust not need to be witnessed? We needed two witnesses for ours. How did he get round that one?

I had to go to an independent solicitor to witness my deed of trust. They explained it to me, made sure I understood the implications and I signed it.

The conveyancing solicitor couldn’t do it as they weren’t impartial... but this was 15 /20 odd years ago