What are three main things which are important for you in a man?

[bunny85]

Interested to know what other women think. Thanks!

Kindness
A good work ethic
A good sense of humour
Ability to be self-sufficient (ie can cook & clean, do laundry etc)

@LifeInAHamsterWheel literally my top 3 as well

Kindness
Integrity
Positive attitude

Honesty
Kindness
Comfortable in their own skin

Loyal
Kind
Intelligent
(And if I could pick another it would be hardworking)

Respectfulness
Respect for boundaries
Erm... not repulsive?

Kindness
Integrity
Generous

Intelligence
Good sex
Easy to be around

It doesn't seem much to ask for does it?! And yet for so many it's hard to come by. I wonder what the answers would be from a man's perspective.

Genuine kindness as in caring about how his actions affect other people (and animals). Including not being sexist/racist/etc - he needs to see me as a person, not a gender role.

Generally compatible interests although do not need to match 100% - I wouldn't get on with a sports fan I don't think. Nor somebody with a rampant sex drive.

Interested and willing to be a team with me and take on life's challenges and boring parts as well as the fun bits.

Loyalty
Kindness
And someone who isn't possessive

Kindness
Similar values
Work ethic/self sufficiency

Funny
Feminist
Emotionally literate/able and willing to talk about feelings.

Kindness
Humour
Good sex

Well I know what DH would answer :o

He always says he loves the way I give him space to do his own thing, and don't want to be in his pocket all the time (suits me. I would find that stifling as well.)

Also similar level of intelligence/able to have an interesting conversation. Or possibly this is more geekiness/lack of interest in popular culture. I do not think that makes me intelligent BTW. It's just something he's mentioned.

And integrity/not being fake. He always says he struggles with new people because most people put up a false persona when they first meet somebody and he can see through it and it bothers him. I don't really get social rules so I ignore a lot of them and he has always said it's refreshing, even though I can be embarrassing :o (He didn't say that, but I know I've put my foot in it many times!)

Now I'm older:

Attractive to me, so I want to sleep with him
High emotional intelligence
fun

Hmm. This is a bit fuzzy for me as I have been in a relationship with the same man for nearly 30 years.

If I was starting again I would say 1. good mental health 2. enthusiasm for cooking 3. lark rather than owl

Funny
Funny &
Clean

Political views. Including things like stance on feminism, racism, xenophobia, disabilism, which ties in with kindness as well.
Funny.
An actual adult who can run a house, get up early, plan, talk about emotions, self sufficient, work ethic etc etc.

Basically not a total knob!

A mature mindset (doesn't have to be older though)
Aspirations
Affectionate

Work ethic
Positivity
Sex appeal

Kindness
Positive attitude
Good work ethic

Those things are hugely attractive to me

Kindness towards others.
Self sufficiency (cook, clean, good work ethic).
Interest in culture and politics.

Generally competent at being an adult, ie can clean the house, cook a decent meal, organise himself, not a financial disaster.

Capable and reliable in a crisis, someone I can lean on when I need to.

Emotional intelligence and self awareness.