@hallybe
If you want to let this go, you can. It might not be easy, but you can do it.
You may have feelings for him but guess what, he doesn't have feelings for you.
He doesn't have feelings for anyone further than getting his dick wet.
A real relationship isn't one sided. Both people truly like each other and treat each other with respect.
Take out your phone and block him everywhere.
Open up notes on your phone. Make a list of the 10 - 20 worst things he's ever done or said to you. Then make a new screen and pin it there.
Every time you think about contacting him or making any excuse for him, open that list and read off each thing.
After each item, say to yourself, and this is how he truly is and he'll never change.
Read it as many times as you have to until the urge to contact him goes away.
If you still feel like it, come post here instead.
Sign up for the Freedom Programme.