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Original poster

Smelly fart date

162 replies

SausageSimon · 06/03/2020 23:04

A couple of weeks ago I went on a date with a guy I used to work with years ago, he got in touch out of the blue and he's really lovely so I thought why not.

We had an excellent time in a nearby city and he showed me some great places, we had a meal and then went to a bar. It started getting busy and we were sat on some settees and all was good!
Then started the smelliest rotten egg farts, truly vile. It got to the third lot of this disgusting odour and I had to say something incase he thought it was me. There was a group of guys behind us and I assumed it was one of them so I said to my date how disgusting it was and that it was making me feel sick. I said I wouldn't be going out if my farts were so bad! (I've only had these awful kind of farts with an upset stomach)

Soon after it was time to head home and the date ended well! Unsure if I fancied him but I had a great time so we arranged another date.

So tonight we went out, he picked me up and as we were driving along and chatting that exact same vile smell wafted it's way around the car Blush

I'm not being dramatic when I say it's the worse fart I have EVER smelt.

He wants to see me again but I honestly hope I never smell that smell ever again in my life!! It's a shame cause he's a really nice man but I can't cope.

Can nerves cause this? He's big on the gym and I also wondered if it was the result of protein shakes or a diet he's on

AIBU to not want to see him again?

If it could be guaranteed I wouldn't have to endure another rotten egger I'd probably be up for it

OP posts:
Erniethefastestmilkman · 07/03/2020 14:48

Jesus if the lad goes to the gym, it’ll be his high protein no doubt egg diet, my friend used to consume a dozen or so eggs a day everybody’s shit stinks op don’t bin him for that just kindly point out he let go when your not in the immediate aftermath area. 😂

MoonshineWashingLine · 07/03/2020 15:07

Agree with Erniethefastestmilkman 👍

EoinMcLovesCakeJumper · 07/03/2020 15:10

You don't have to "give him a chance" if you don't want to. To hell with that people-pleasing nonsense. I'm sorry if there are people on this thread who feel personally affronted that disgusting-smelling farts are a dealbreaker for some, but that's life. People are entitled to not fancy someone for whatever reason they like. If you can say you've never been put off someone because of a completely trivial thing (like a weird voice, or the way they always mispronounce a particular word, or their awful taste in shoes) then I'm sure you're a better person than me. But it's perfectly reasonable to find rotten-egg bowel gases off-putting and to look for somebody who doesn't make you feel sick.

kevintheorangecarrot · 07/03/2020 15:16

LMAO

whatisheupto · 07/03/2020 15:16

My main concern would be whether he cares. If he is doing it and just doesn't give a shit (sorry, pun) then that's the problem. The farting itself is potentially something that could be overcome/ sorted out. But his attitude would be hard to change. Is he considerate and kind and keen to please you? Or arrogant and selfish?

PeterPanGoesWrong · 07/03/2020 15:17

If he’s nice id give him another chance. It might just have been an unfortunate one off.

If it happens on the next date, laugh about it and mention it, he needs to sort his arse out or no more dates.
You’re mums right, everyone does it.

jewel1968 · 07/03/2020 15:21

You got nothing to lose by telling him especially if you are about to decide you can't carry on with him. It sounds to me likely that it is IBS or diet related and at least you can have a conversation. You will be doing him a favour as he may not know the strength of feeling people have around manners etc...

People can be a little precious about things like this and the disgust factor is well and truly triggered. Holding in farts is considered to be bad for you especially if you have a condition like IBS so people should be a bit more understanding. Admittedly if you are gagging because of the smell you can't talk yourself not to gag. Talk to him and together you might find a solution. Worth a try?

Original poster
SausageSimon · 07/03/2020 16:04

@whatisheupto I'd say he is considerate and kind yes! But sometimes I feel like he's trying hard to please me which I find a little bit off putting personally.

I've had it in the past before where they've been doing everything to please me and you end up feeling a little bit manipulated in a sense because it isn't quite genuine even if it comes from good intentions

OP posts:
Original poster
SausageSimon · 07/03/2020 16:04

He's very relaxed btw, he isn't blatantly nervous on the dates! Very confident and chatty, which makes me wonder if the farts aren't nerves related

OP posts:
Raspberrytruffle · 07/03/2020 16:27

If hes big on the gym hes probably got the protein farts! Eating lots of it gives you the most disgusting farts ever! Yanbu though I'd be saying no more dates Envy

NotanotherboxofFrogs · 07/03/2020 16:35

I can totally sympathise with how bad it can be, the smell or even trying to withhold it from happening.

Im lucky with my DP + family/friends who know when I say excuse me, know I am about to let it off (feeling the rumbles). This can be mud words I get the feeling and I'm off.

I don't have the ability to hold it (physically as my splinter muscles don't work properly) and will make a joke about it instead.

It is mortifying but out of my control

I also try to run to a loo or somewhere if I suspect that it isn't just wind and have been caught short many times as I couldn't get in a loo fast enough.

I open car windows if I get the first rumble in and it doesn't matter how much I want it not to happen, I can't stop it.

I've had medication, tests, procedures, surgery and in the long term I am probably looking at a stoma.

I hate it happening and wish many times I could escape from the stink myself, it's made a lot worse especially when needing antibiotics and amoxcillian is the absolute worst for me. My diet is limited and controlled

It could be a health problem, medication related, bad bowels, dietary or other things so talk to him about it as (pardon the pun) will fester between you like a bad smell.

SistemaAddict · 07/03/2020 16:40

This thread has given me a much needed laugh. I could power my own wind farm but there's no way I'd fart on a date. In fact if I knew I was going on a date I'd adjust my diet a few days before to avoid all the foods that set me off. He's seems oblivious, doesn't care or is enjoying the effect he has on you.

friendineed · 07/03/2020 16:44

I'd send him a nice text explaining the problem, suggesting what may be causing it (IBS?) and saying thanks but no thanks.

HotPenguin · 07/03/2020 16:48

The first time I took my now DH home, he couldn't stop belching due to nerves. Could it be something similar? Is nervous farting a thing?

PhilCornwall1 · 07/03/2020 17:01

Would you fart in a meeting with your boss? In a crowded lift?

My boss? Yep, he'd join in I'm sure. A crowded lift? With the amount of drugs I have to take, no way, it would be too obvious I did it, they'd hear it on the top floor of the Shard if I let rip in Reception!!!!

Gwenhwyfar · 07/03/2020 18:34

"Would you fart in a meeting with your boss? In a crowded lift?"

Yes, I can't help when I fart!

Gwenhwyfar · 07/03/2020 18:35

"In fact if I knew I was going on a date I'd adjust my diet a few days before to avoid all the foods that set me off."

Not everyone has certain foods that set them off though. For me, I get phases of flatulence and then things will calm down. It's not really linked to what food I'm eating.

Gwenhwyfar · 07/03/2020 18:37

" I'm sorry if there are people on this thread who feel personally affronted that disgusting-smelling farts are a dealbreaker for some, but that's life."

I understand it completely. I wouldn't go out with me.
What I find offensive is the idea that people do it on purpose and that they're bad people for it. Why would anyone do this on purpose? It's humiliating.

Gwenhwyfar · 07/03/2020 18:40

"two different men have done absolutely revolting farts in circuit classes when I've been one station behind them. Absolutely disgusting and unforgivable. "

How is it unforgivable? They surely weren't trying to do it. I presume the movement made it happen. You get the same thing at yoga, particularly with people who are new to it. In yoga, it's considered polite not to make anyone feel bad about it and be understanding.

Gwenhwyfar · 07/03/2020 18:43

"Charcoal tablets can work marvellously but he needs to take 8 to 10 at a time, crunch them up in his teeth and swallow with a glass of water"

Really? Is this through trial and error? The bottle says 2 at a time and swallowed whole.

Brainengaged1 · 07/03/2020 19:21

I don’t Care if it’s a protein fart, a milk shake fart , an egg fart . You needs to move to the nearest fresh air you can find and start to make wretching noises

Don’t you hang around long enough to start analysing the aromas .

EoinMcLovesCakeJumper · 07/03/2020 19:28

Gwenhwyfar I'm sure the guy didn't do it on purpose, and perhaps he's deeply embarrassed and was hoping that the smell wasn't as bad as he feared it might be. Maybe he was genuinely oblivious- after all, our own farts never seem to smell as bad as other people's. What I suppose I was trying to get at is that the OP has only been on two dates with the guy, it sounds like she isn't going to able to fancy him now, and she doesn't owe him another date if it's just not going to happen for her. Loads of dates fail to go anywhere for one reason or another.

SistemaAddict · 07/03/2020 19:32

Imagine what it could be like once he gets to know you and really relaxes around you! This is the make a good impression stage and he's trying to suffocate you with his silent but deadly eggy boffs.

Brainengaged1 · 07/03/2020 19:36

Ok maybe he had a problem , but he must get help . Professional help. Forget the DIY blinking charcoal tablets .

Listen - if he is like his while you are dating , then good God only knows what will he be like when you are an item ? He will be leaving a right trail of destruction

LilyJade · 07/03/2020 19:48

Basically ask yourself do you still fancy him OP....

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