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Original poster

Tell me some disturbing/wrong things about your exes (maybe lighthearted)

118 replies

Interestedwoman · 11/02/2020 18:43

Hi all,

Please could you tell me some disturbing/wrong things about your exes?

I'll start. (TW:...

He had something wrong with him...where he couldn't see. It seemed like there was some leakage? I only knew because I had to get up close and personal with it. Envy One time a bit was sticking out. Shock I drew the line at that.

I probably should've told him. Maybe it was something serious. Shock Perhaps I should somehow let him know. Grin

OP posts:
Whynosnowyet · 11/02/2020 20:31

I think the op's man had a winnit...

Bezalelle · 11/02/2020 20:38

OP, what do you MEAN?? Was it poo? Was it the end of his knob?

cowboy · 11/02/2020 20:38

What is a winnit??! 😂

Oxfordnono12 · 11/02/2020 20:55

I'd like to know what you meant also..

My ex once sat me down with his dad to tell me we were seeing too much of each other, no joke like proper interview set up in his kitchen. I seen him on a friday night, an odd Saturday. I was studying for GCSE's.. Ok, weird as fuck but went with it. Then he said we didn't see enough of each other.

Needless to say, he is an ex! He run til his da to do so much for him.

BuzzShitbagBobbly · 11/02/2020 21:03

OP, what do you MEAN?? Was it poo? Was it the end of his knob?

I am giggling at the exasperated confusion in this comment. I love the idea it was his knob sticking out and the OP didn't like it! GrinGrinGrin

(FWIW, I assumed piles)

Dillydallyontheway · 11/02/2020 21:14

Just googled what a winnit is 😂 apparently it is a ball of poo stuck onto a matted bum hair

Cynara · 11/02/2020 21:17

I'm with the others, I don't have the faintest idea what the opening post is about and moreover pondering the possibilities is making me feel a bit nauseous.

Sux2buthen · 11/02/2020 21:20

I popped on here quickly while waiting for something.
Sadly I discovered the word 'winner' and what it means.
SadGrin

Sux2buthen · 11/02/2020 21:20

Winnit not winner

Flymetothetoon · 11/02/2020 21:25

Ok I'll bite.
When I finished with my ex he shaved a crusifix into his chest hair and then went abroad on holiday to show how much is 'crucified' him .
How I laughed not

Jiggles101 · 11/02/2020 21:46

Haha, I haven't heard 'winnit' in years!

A boy at schools uncle always uses to greet people by saying 'how's yer washer for winnits?'

Gross but funny!

Whynosnowyet · 11/02/2020 22:05

A winnit is a bit of poo that winnit come off!!
Grin

happychatty · 11/02/2020 22:30

This thread 🤣

Windmillwhirl · 11/02/2020 22:36

A whole new take on 'you've gotta be in it to winnit' Grin

GilbertMarkham · 11/02/2020 23:03

The attempts to clarify the opening post itt are fkg hilarious. I'm still not sure what was up with him.

I have an ex who refused to wear glasses in spite of very likely needing them - he used to hold generic reading glasses in front of him when reading the local paper, wouldn't actually put them on but best/worst of all used to wave at empty parked vehicles (thus is in a very rural area where everyone waves when they pass another vehicle).

Should he have been driving - possibly not.

His sensitivity about any signs if aging also led him to have his hairdresser dye his Grey's - which didn't really work, they just went reddish. Early in I thought he had v reddish brown hair, then realised it was half grey that hadn't "taken" dye.

He also refused to take off his t-shirt in bed due to discomfort with his belly size - a nearly 18 month relationship and he kept insisting on wearing a t-shirt; can't remember if we even had sex once with him without a t-shirt on.

GilbertMarkham · 11/02/2020 23:04

*Grey's not Grey's

GilbertMarkham · 11/02/2020 23:05

Fkg autocorrect - greys

theoldtrout01876 · 12/02/2020 01:24

My exh used to shit in the shower EVERY DAY cos he was too lazy to get out and figured it would all wash away and the tub would be miraculously clean just by him standing under the water and it was therefore safe to bathe toddlers in i spent a lot of time scrubbing the bath in that marriage

PixieRabbit · 12/02/2020 01:54

DO YOU MEAN DINGLEBERRIES OP

PixieRabbit · 12/02/2020 01:55

theoldtrout01876

Shitting in the shower? Oh my god! Did it even go down the plug hole?

Original poster
Interestedwoman · 12/02/2020 02:55

Ah ok. Really sorry for the delay- you've all kept me busy all night with the Songs thread. Smile

I think the op's man had a winnit.

@Home42 I had to google winnit, but not quite.

@PixieRabbit When he rolled over and presented his arse, expecting me to proceed, it was more like a large piece of fudge sticking out. Shock

I got some loo roll and wiped it off before going ahead. It was still pretty gross. I have problems saying no. Grin

@mommymooo Wow! Sounds like a lucky escape. How've you been for comical/mockworthy exes?

I love the idea it was his knob sticking out and the OP didn't like it!

@BuzzShitbagBobbly Also true. Grin

^Ok I'll bite.
When I finished with my ex he shaved a crusifix into his chest hair and then went abroad on holiday to show how much is 'crucified' him .
How I laughed not^

@Flymetothetoon lol!

@theoldtrout01876 WTAF ohmagerrrd

OP posts:
Weffiepops · 12/02/2020 03:35

Your post doesn't make sense??

I can't believe the one about the guy who slept in his work clothes - creased!!

arboretum89 · 12/02/2020 04:47

OMG!!

I'm not often shocked OP, but no... just no. I'm glad you saw the funny side ... I have to say I don't think I could have! Confused

Mammyloveswine · 12/02/2020 05:13

Did he not get embarrassed by you having to wipe shit out of his arse? Did you rim him? OMG I feel ill

honeylulu · 12/02/2020 07:02

Euuurrggh!!! Feeling sick. Expected you "to proceed" with what? A rim job?
Actually I don't want to know.

You aren't wrong that you have a problem with saying no.