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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Why would he???

73 replies

Minimaa · 06/12/2019 23:13

Husband of 10 years went on a lads trip to Dubai last week. Our phones are linked so I can see his search history. Whilst he was away he twice searched for morning after pill. He also searched for a viagra substitute. And obviously found one, and shared the details with a friend. Am dying inside. This is not right isn’t it. Moved to a new town about 5 months ago and don’t have family or friends near to discuss this with. Am slowly going mad.

OP posts:
mildlymiffed · 06/12/2019 23:37

Well, long and short of it is that we're all speculating here. I'd suggest if your relationship is otherwise good that you just ask him what it's all about.

Original poster
Minimaa · 06/12/2019 23:45

I feel sick to my stomach. I feel angry, sad. Want to kill him, confused. It does not point to anything innocent, in my mind, at all

OP posts:
SandyY2K · 06/12/2019 23:45

So does his search history automatically show up on your phone?

If so, he must also be able to see your search history. Very strange or foolish for him to do that knowing you can see.

If he has a better signal or a free or cheaper data plan, that might be why he is searching for the things on his phone.

Are his friends all in relationships?

As you haven't gone snooping for the information, I would ask him why he was searching for the MAP...and viagra substitutes. I suspect he'll say it was for a friend.

I certainly wouldn't be sleeping with him again and this could well be the end of the marriage for me.

Good luck

HarryElephante · 06/12/2019 23:45

Have you asked him?

Original poster
Minimaa · 06/12/2019 23:52

Not asked yet. Unless he tells me that he did have sex with someone else, I won’t believe anything else. Am sick to my stomach as I just feel that something is not right.

OP posts:
DeathByPicolax · 06/12/2019 23:59

It walks, looks. swims and sounds like a duck here OP. I think you need to start a conversation with , "So what is her name?"

FloreanFortescue · 06/12/2019 23:59

Hmmm something not quite right! Surely he'd know you'd see it though?

PepsiLola · 07/12/2019 00:02

I'd print out all the history, and messages, and put them on the table in front of him and say explain.

Tbh, I wouldn't believe anything he says now anyway. His trip wasn't for formula 1, it was a lads pretending to be single trip!

Tartypants · 07/12/2019 00:05

did he search for 'morning after pill' or 'xxname of drug' - could he have found some and wondered what it was? Though twinned with the viagra it's not looking good...

Onemansoapopera · 07/12/2019 00:11

Sorry, how come you can view each others search history?

But aside from that, if you've disabled it for your daughter then surely your DH would disable it for himself if he was up to anything dodgy. Are you sure he''s not winding you up?

Also, never, in my history of sleeping with any man ever - have they EVER taken responsibility for checking out the morning after pill -so I call bullshit

IndieTara · 07/12/2019 00:21

A man looking for the morning after pill?

mamato3lads · 07/12/2019 00:31

Yep I'd be going off the wall

Why oh why would he search for the morning after pill ??? Apart from the obvious reason

This stinks. I'd say hes been up to no good...theres just no explanation for it

Sorry OP you must feel ill xxx

Original poster
Minimaa · 07/12/2019 00:36

That is it, for what reason on earth would he be searching for that??? He did it on holiday and searched twice. I don’t need it, he definitely doesn’t so what he googling it for????
I am past sick.

OP posts:
Ilovethekitties · 07/12/2019 00:45

To stop ejaculate from fertilizing an egg maybe

whatnottodo · 07/12/2019 00:46

Well I think the only option is because he had unprotected sex and was researching the morning after pill..
no matter how much you'll want to convince yourself of it being innocent.. it clearly isn't

Selmababies · 07/12/2019 00:47

Do you know for certain that he went with a male friend? is it possible that he went there with a woman he already knew from home?

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow1 · 07/12/2019 00:49

Can you even get the morning after pill in Dubai? It's a very conservative country. Could be executed for sec outside marriage there

MidnightMystery · 07/12/2019 00:49
Thanks
expat101 · 07/12/2019 00:53

Yes I wondered if indeed he went with a ''lad'' at all. And Dubai? Really? Nah.

GabsAlot · 07/12/2019 00:54

He shared it with a friend so he was prob lookin it up for him-whoever is searching for it though its very dodgy out there very strcit laws

Derbee · 07/12/2019 00:55

Can’t you just search “husband googling morning after pill” so that he can see it?

Spacebowlisback · 07/12/2019 00:57

Friends don’t need men to google this for them. Women know enough about emergency contraception.

This is odd though because even if he’d slept with someone, again, why isn’t that woman googling her own contraception?

MissLadyM · 07/12/2019 00:57

Bastard. And fucking stupid. Confront him and boot his fucking arse out.

Spacebowlisback · 07/12/2019 00:57

Hang on - is this thread title on your history?

christmassymcchristmas · 07/12/2019 01:02

"Unless he tells me that he did have sex with someone else, I won’t believe anything else."

Read what you just wrote. And read it again. And wonder why you'd set yourself such a low bar