She's 32 and likes a guy who's been her gym trainer for a couple of months.
She's convinced he fancies her and has seen all the 'signs'. Like him touching her arm, using her name more, seeming awkward etc.
It may well be possible that he does, but he's apparently had a girlfriend for years.
She's now invited him to her house party tomorrow and is asking me for tips on what to wear, how to impress him, analysing his texts etc.
I just ended up telling her that IF he is unhappy with the girlfriend for other reasons, he will break up with her in time and my friend will be free to pursue him.
I asked her though if she really wanted someone who would just chuck their girlfriend for someone else and how could she be sure he wouldn't do the same to her ?
I said that having a crush is normal and no harm in being friends but he's not single, and how would she feel if she were the girlfriend and her guy was into someone else.
She took it quite badly and said thanks for making her depressed before the party (it's tomorrow). She said she's been single for years and guys she likes are always taken.
(i think she meant that this is coincidental as opposed to her deliberately targeting taken guys).
She finished by saying sometimes you meet other people you like more and it would be stupid not to pursue it and to have regrets.
I see where she's coming from but having been there, after a 'friend' of my ex of 3 years pursued him and he left me for her, it's absolutely crushing and painful.
If i'm giving her pointers on how to pursue a taken guy, that doesn't make me any better.
What would you have said in this situation ?