Does anybody else feel grossed out about somebody they've been intimate with?

[Supertumbles]

Short fling of a few months, I was having a fab time at first and found him very attractive but It soon became apparent he had a personality disorder. Having a personality disorder alone didn't put me off at all as it was beyond his control, but his conduct sealed the deal unfortunately because he was unbearable to be with in the end, and nasty.

I now reflect on the "relationship" and cringe, I can't believe i was ever attracted to him let alone slept with him and felt all giddy.

I'm wondering how my judgement was so clouded I was able to find him so attractive, when just a short while later the thought/look of him makes my skin crawl.

I can't even blame it on alcohol as I was never drunk. I'm baffled as to what I was thinking.

Does anybody else feel this way about an ex / old flame?

I probably sound horrible, I'm generally not. He is the only man I've ever felt this way towards, probably because of his conduct really.

Yep one guy in particular had a human skull on his altar.

I’ll admit to pausing at ‘human skull’ but the jaw dropped at ‘his altar.’

His altar?. Was he a priest?

Think it was mostly raging hormones for me. See a cute guy and wow!
Then I'd get to know him and ick. cognitive dissonance maybe.

It's funny I was such a horn dog in my youth but now, meh couldn't be bothered with sex most of the time. mentalpause, I suppose

Great, I’ll probably have hideous nightmares about mine tonight. That will teach me... just one more thread, then lights out. Put down the iPad Chunkers!

I’ve been there, it’s normal.

I feel like this about all my exes!

Unfortunately I was married to him. Short, fat, controlling. Poor dental hygiene meant he is missing most of his molars and he always had bad breath. His obsession with cramming anything edible he could into his mouth. His arsey attitude. The financial control. The final straw was marital rape.
I had two babies with this man. But now the thought of ever having been intimate with him makes me feel physically sick. Thankfully he is now a soon to be ex husband.

My friends and I call this The Revulsion. Once you've got it, it's impossible to get rid of. I remember briefly seeing a guy in the marines - not my usual type, but I gave him a try. On our third date, he turned up wearing a shiny taffeta shirt, acid wash bell-bottom jeans and brown, frayed square-toe loafers. Then, spent most of the evening making snide comments about what other people in the bar were wearing.

The Revulsion was strong with that one. There was no fourth date. (He was also a complete arsehole.)

"The ick" love that

Some of these men sound awful, very deserving recipients of the sudden revulsion me thinks!

I never knew this was such a thing, the internet is brilliant. You learn something new every day

Were they like this, bettycrocka?

Those with battered lofas definitely deserve the ick

My most recent Ick is actually a pretty good looking man but once The Ick set in I couldn’t bear the way he folded his arms over his stomach when queuing at a supermarket check out.
Also, sometimes his nose whistled.

I’m loving this thread

So true that once the ick is there there's no going back. The last time I slept with my exh I'd kind of made myself do it - like, right, I need to sort my marriage out, I need to make the effort - and then I looked at him during and was just like, no, can't do this. Had to stop. Made some crap excuse. Never slept with him again, told him it was over soon after.

One particular ex of mine I am totally at a loss as to what I was thinking. This is 20 years ago now but I remember my best mate saying "Are you fucking serious? Have you seen him?!" and I got terribly defensive and upset. He had a mullet, and he never washed! As well as being about a foot shorter than me. God knows why I did it. He was also horrible. She's still a mate now and when we intermittently meet we get drunk and cackle at my lunacy.

An ex of mine. He had a very thin dick that bent in a weird direction. It was weird. I remember looking at it one day and thinking “ick” and once I’d thought that, it was the end of the relationship. I couldn’t stand to touch it again after that

I couldn’t bear the way he folded his arms over his stomach when queuing at a supermarket check out.
Also, sometimes his nose whistled.

This has made me burst out laughing

Yes! Pretty much all my ex's 😂 but definitely my most recent....
No fucking idea what I was thinking 🤷🏼‍♀️😂

My Ick also had an unattractive package. He sent me an unwelcome picture of it one day, my guess is in attempt to get me in the mood and want to see him. It had the opposite effect. It looked like an angry molerat with dwarfism

Infact now I really think about it, that is roughly when the Ick began.

yep, my ex totally grosses me out now when I see him. And quite frankly he did for about the last 3 or 4 years of our relationship. I hated sleeping in the same bed as him

Attractiveness is mostly cerebral. If you don't actually like the person on the inside, even the most objectively gorgeous person can be ugly to you.

angry dwarf molerat

Very much so. The last couple of guys I was involved with turn my stomach. Both treated me appallingly. The first insulted my looks /career / anything . And the second, was a womaniser . Any woman was fair game. He had sexually deviant fantasies (in my opinion ).Last time I saw him I felt physically revolted as well as he has a personal hygiene problem . Wish I had never met either.

Oh yeah!
The 'ICK FACTOR'
Get it way too often.

He had sexually deviant fantasies (in my opinion)

Yep can also relate to that suspicion.

Mine was far too interested in all of these 'paedo hunter groups' and spoke very nonchalantly about how he was approached by a woman on a dating site, who was talking to him about her 'fetish' which was to act like a child.

On reflection, it was probably him approaching people with them fantasies.

He would say to me "I bet you like naughty things that you can't tell anybody about don't you, come on you can tell me" - as if he was trying to ascertain whether I was as fucked up as he was, testing the waters.

When I said nope the 'kinkiest' thing I was into was still very normal, he then changed his tune and said yeah it's weird all that stuff isn't it, I blocked the woman etc.

Hiding in plain sight i think. Very creepy individual. It's no wonder I got the ick and got rid ASAP.

Dick pics!
Why do men do this?
It's not attractive.
Your dick will be out there on the WWW forever.
WTF are you doing?
When I was on dating sites I made it very clear that dick pics would not be welcome.
Again 'ICK'

Many times 🤢😂🤢

Oh yes - I had a fling with a bloke I met at work. Now I look back on it, he was just using me for sex although he promised the world. Used to want to drive out to the country and do it in the open, or round the back of buildings. Makes me feel really sick now! Wasted my best years on him.

Yeah, just about all of 'em — with the exception of one — who was just ..... amazing