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Original poster

Help!!!! Naked pic on my husbands phone

106 replies

Sesicilana · 03/11/2019 20:42

My husband was just on his phone and I noticed picture of boobs so I straight away asked what is it and that I wanna see it. There was a message “my boyfriend gave me your number how are you” and pic of breast. My husband replied “great boobs. How have you been?” no more conversation. He is trying to tell me it was just random stranger and he has no idea who is it. Thoughts - I am pretty upset, but his cold and casual responses made me think I overreacted Confused. Your thoughts??

OP posts:
Original poster
Sesicilana · 03/11/2019 20:56

Well it’s something we discussed we would be up to in future - but definitely wouldn’t be happy he would do it without me!!!

OP posts:
Newbiemumsy66 · 03/11/2019 20:57

I’d be annoyed at the tits comment to be honest. Not something a man in a relationship should be saying. That alone would make me question him further.

Interestedwoman · 03/11/2019 20:58

Even if it's a phishing thing then his reply to another woman is not ok and shows he's open to considering other women while married to you.

His 'how've you been?' to a random stranger (if that's the case) is weird, maybe he was trying to flirt/continue the conversation awkwardly.

RantyAnty · 03/11/2019 21:01

I would demand to see his phone but chances are he's already deleted it.
The thing about confronting or asking for an explanation is 99% of the time, the just lie and it makes you even more upset, especially if they are dismissive or gaslight you.

I am guessing swinging from what you said.

I would just ask him to leave. You can't unsee what you saw.

TabithasMumCaroline · 03/11/2019 21:06

Sounds like 90% of the junk mail I get, and I’m a 48yo female. Between 6 and 40 pics of tits and splayed legs a day, often with stupid ‘personal’ messages like it missed you today, why didn’t you meet me?’ or ‘hurry up, I’m waiting for you’ or ‘did you miss me?’

Difference is, I don’t reply because they are obviously spam. Weird that he would.

bluebunny123 · 03/11/2019 21:06

I would want to see that phone again myself so I could properly have a look at what's been said. If he's doing things like that you're not happy with how can you stay with him.

BumWad · 03/11/2019 21:09

Kik = cheating

Original poster
Sesicilana · 03/11/2019 21:11

I just went to ask him again - he said “how have you been”is the same like “how are you”’and when I said I’m not happy he replied he was quiet and said maybe I should go to bed

OP posts:
Candle1000 · 03/11/2019 21:11

Ask to see the message again, say (lie) that you might be interested, if he says he’s deleted it, then he’s up to no good.

Original poster
Sesicilana · 03/11/2019 21:11

I don’t think there is a point in asking him to see his phone - he probably deleted it all

OP posts:
Ginger1982 · 03/11/2019 21:12

"I just went to ask him again - he said “how have you been”is the same like “how are you”’and when I said I’m not happy he replied he was quiet and said maybe I should go to bed"

Bullshit. You need to be more assertive here. Get angry. Demand to know what is going on!

Candle1000 · 03/11/2019 21:12

Definitely up to no good Op.

WorraLiberty · 03/11/2019 21:13

The swinging site would actually be possible - he is dreaming about having group sex

So that would explain why her boyfriend gave her your DH's number.

upups · 03/11/2019 21:13

Will you be able to trust him after this? How can you move on if you can't trust him. This would have to be in for me.

YouJustDoYou · 03/11/2019 21:15

What happens with a lot of men who discuss swinging or whatever "in the future possibly but not now", they then can't get the fantasy out of their heads.

LilouBlue · 03/11/2019 21:17

Kik = cheating

Not always. In this instance it looks likely (sorry OP) but it's also handy when online dating, want to chat offsite to someone but don't feel ready to give out your number. That's what I've used it for, not cheating.

crustycrab · 03/11/2019 21:17

If it's WhatsApp or Facebook then he had the message thread open for you to have been able to see the picture.

SpookilyBadOooooooh · 03/11/2019 21:20

@BumWad

Kik = cheating

Crap I use kik & I’m not cheating. Neither are lots of others who use it.

@Sesicilana. Sounds like he’s getting a head start in the swinging. Are you open to it because you genuinely want to do it, or do you feel pressured into it?

Original poster
Sesicilana · 03/11/2019 21:20

He didn’t - he for some reason took his time to screenshot it (didn’t wanna show me)

OP posts:
PennyGold · 03/11/2019 21:21

I'd leave it for a few weeks and act completely normal to lower his guard, then I'd look at his phone to establish exactly what's happening.
If you approach it again now he'll already have a whole back story.. whereas if he thinks you've discounted it he'll soon get back to it if he is cheating.
I'd then gather enough evidence to bring it up and then to divorce him.
There's absolutely no reason he'd be on Kik.. notoriously known as a hook up messenger as you don't need a persons mobile number to contact them.

Original poster
Sesicilana · 03/11/2019 21:21

I am considering it because I want to - but I said 10-15years from now

OP posts:
Greenleafer19 · 03/11/2019 21:22

I would think it's a spam msg but why did he reply?! Confused

GeneHuntLover · 03/11/2019 21:22

Welcome back OP, another name change?

Original poster
Sesicilana · 03/11/2019 21:23

The thing is he has password so I can never get in his phone. I feel funny about adlomg to see - what if he is not doing anything and hates me for going through the phone Sad

OP posts:
ImBlue · 03/11/2019 21:23

Fab swingers!

That's what'll be. Without a doubt.

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