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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

4 and half years later.....

105 replies

litterbird · 17/10/2019 20:07

Quick back story....4 and half years ago, happy as Larry. My partner (who I had known for decades and we had been in a relationship for 5 years) were eagerly looking at houses, just booked a holiday together...looking forward to the future. He turned 50 and slightly changed, new sports car, different hairstyle, new gym etc etc. Anyway...out of the blue walked in one day, said he didn't want to be with me and left. As quickly as that he was gone. I managed to ask him as he left if he met someone else...he smirked and said "that would be too easy wouldn't it"...I shall never ever forget his smirk and words that day. 5 days later I discovered pictures and declarations of love on social media of a younger woman he had met at the new gym. I went into shock for over a year, I can't remember much of that year, then my dad died on top of that. I haven't seen him or heard his voice since that day he walked away. I didn't chase, I sat there in shock, unable to breathe for what felt like an eternity. I had to go to therapy as my self esteem went south. My world had wobbled off its axis. I felt unsafe, frightened of the future, unable to cope at times. Although I have recovered somewhat, I haven't recovered fully. I have not been able to find another full time relationship but found happiness in dating a handful of lovely gentlemen who take me out and have decided this is it for me and have peace with this. My ex had tried to contact me throughout the years but was always still with the person he left and I wanted nothing to do with him and was quite curt with him to stay away. Today I am stable and happy.....then half an hour ago I get a message from him....he has left the woman he left me for .......and wants to meet up to talk. SERIOUSLY!!!!!!!!!! I am absolutely gobsmacked that he has sent this and I actually laughed out loud reading it. What astounds me with men, and I am sure women do this who get left by the OM, is the cheek of it. On what planet does he think I am on that I am going to hop, skip and jump to him to have a coffee to sooth his broken heart. It really beggars belief sometimes. Yes, he damaged me immensely, but I have healed a lot, learned a lot and would never, ever give him even 30 seconds of my valuable time. What is it with men who can't be alone for 5 minutes and want to run as fast as possible to the most available woman to mop their brows. Sorry, big rant over. I am going back to my Gin and Tonic.

OP posts:
ProfessorPootle · 20/10/2019 17:07

Wish there was a narcissistic smirk emoji you could send along with a ‘lol’.

Maybe best response is no response? Delete and block x

Blueoasis · 20/10/2019 19:41

Aw shame you deleted it. You could have agreed to meet up, get all dressed up, looking your absolute best. And then when he tries to turn on the charm go 'oh sweetie did you think this is for you? You'll never have me again because you're a cheating twat. I'm off on a date with another guy now, bye' and walk away making him look like a complete douchebag.

But no response is probably better. Knocks him down a few more pegs after what his ex dumped him.

Boopeedoop · 20/10/2019 22:21

Just reply "that would be too easy, wouldn't it". And then block him.

ThatLibraryMiss · 20/10/2019 22:37

New phone who dis

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But actually, better just to ignore and block.

firstoffence · 21/10/2019 00:07

How about....
“Yes I would love to meet up again..... oh I’m sorry I have two blokes in my contacts under the heading ‘huge cock’ and I got you mixed up. Ciao”

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