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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

In shock- no one to talk too

97 replies

TheMuteMoose · 29/09/2019 21:37

After giving my emotionally abusive ex another go tonight he took it to a whole new level. I have no one to talk too as no friends or family knew I was trying with him again. I feel so stupid, heart broken and a mess.

What have I done.

OP posts:
gamerchick · 29/09/2019 21:39

Are you safe?

Original poster
TheMuteMoose · 29/09/2019 21:40

I realise that was a major drip feed. So some more details. He has been out with friends this evening, I went to pick him up as I had his car. After an hour in the couch laughing and joking it was like a light switch, he just turned. Saying the most hurtful, horrible things. Maybe I brought it on myself but I was trying to stop him leaving, I wanted to talk it though and find out what the issue was and why he flipped.. that was so hen he grabbed me, picked me up and slammed me into the floor full force..

I can’t even believe i have written them words. My life feels like it is over

OP posts:
FizzyGreenWater · 29/09/2019 21:41

Call the police.

TERFisNotAnInsult · 29/09/2019 21:41

Oh sweetheart.

Has he left? Are you safe now?

Neolara · 29/09/2019 21:42

I'm sorry this has happened to you. Do you need to see a doctor? Is he still with you?

AtrociousCircumstance · 29/09/2019 21:42

No, your life can begin properly now. Without him. Healthily always from him.

Are you safe?

You can call the police, he assaulted you. He ought to go to jail OP.

But the most important things are: get somewhere safe. End this sham of a relationship for good. Get some support.

Flowers
AtrociousCircumstance · 29/09/2019 21:42

*away from him

Littlechocola · 29/09/2019 21:42

Is he still there?
Do you have friends or family you can call?

Shouldbedoing · 29/09/2019 21:44

This could be the beginning of the rest of your life now you have seen him for what he is.

bubblebar · 29/09/2019 21:44

Tell your friends and family. You need real life support. Sorry this has happened to you op.

Original poster
TheMuteMoose · 29/09/2019 21:46

He has gone, driven off after all afternoon drinking. I offered to take him home, but by that point he had flipped and turned into a horrible person

OP posts:
forumdonkey · 29/09/2019 21:46

Phone the police please.

Littlechocola · 29/09/2019 21:47

Do you feel able to call the police @TheMuteMoose?

AnyFucker · 29/09/2019 21:47

Let him go. Call the police and give them his reg no.

Never spend any time with him again.

funnylittlefloozie · 29/09/2019 21:48

Are you badly hurt? My advice would be to call the police and report him for assault, to be quite honest. What a vile, cowardly individual he is. Hope you are ok, whatever you decide to do.

Starlight456 · 29/09/2019 21:49

You need to phone the police he is violent and drink driving.

I am sorry you are having to go through this but it will happen again if you don’t stop it.

Are you injured. Do you need medical treatment?

AtrociousCircumstance · 29/09/2019 21:50

If he is drunk driving you must call the police. Tell them he’s drunk driving and that he assaulted you.

He could kill someone OP, pissed in his car. And he could kill you next time. Or, maybe it will be his next girlfriend?

Please call the police.

CandyLeBonBon · 29/09/2019 21:52

I hope you have the strength to call the police op

LionsHeart · 29/09/2019 21:52

Are you hurt? Did you hit your head?
Ring the police, ask for help and a hospital check up if you feel you need one.

Original poster
TheMuteMoose · 29/09/2019 21:52

I am safe, I’m sore but ok. I am numb with shock, for weeks he has lured me back in pretending to change and that he loves me. We have had the most amazing weekend and now this.

He has drink driven home. He has jus called me to give me a load of abuse, so I know he made it back.

I’m aching all over. And my heart feels like it has been ripped out of my chest

OP posts:
Original poster
TheMuteMoose · 29/09/2019 21:54

Apparently all my fault as he just wanted space tonight. He had made plans to come and stay with me for the night after seeing his friends. I have pushed him to this be being needy and clingy.

I should have never let this man back into my life. I had weeks of NC and he worked his way back in.

OP posts:
AtrociousCircumstance · 29/09/2019 21:56

So you feel able to send one text saying the relationship is over, and then block?

And then call the police. They will be on your side OP.

AnyFucker · 29/09/2019 21:57

So, what now ?

Gazelda · 29/09/2019 21:58

Ok. Don't dwell on how or why it happened. Clean slate. Report him to the police for the assault. Tell them about his drink driving. Block his calls. Call a mate and tell them what's happened. Be safe, look to the future that doesn't include him.

BitOfFun · 29/09/2019 21:58

You're not going to let him back in now, are you?