Am I right to be upset?

[Quandryquandry]

Came home recently to find my house mysteriously clean and tidy. DH said he’d had a professional cleaner in as I hadn’t cleaned or tidied recently. When I had a meltdown about having a stranger I’d never met come into my house, rifle through and reorganise my possessions and wash my dirty underwear without my knowledge or consent and asked why he hadn’t at least let me know in advance he appeared shocked and said he thought he was helping me. What would others have felt?

I'd have been happy that the house was clean and tidy 🤷‍♀️

I would be bloody insulted that he was suggesting it is your job to clean and tidy unless (apart from having a penis) there is some reason he couldn't.

I'd be delighted.

I'd have been over the moon! May show husband this thread and hope he takes the hint 🙈

Seems quite a pointed act on his side (why's the cleaning down to you normally?) and I'd hate the intrusion.

Very happy, although I wouldn't be happy bout them touching my washing.
I'm now thinking about whether I'd be annoyed that he's done it in a passive aggressive manner.
No, I don't think so, I think I'd be happy.

I would have felt the same as you.

Washed your smalls? Re organised stuff?

A normal cleaner, or something more?

You sound hysterical. Get a grip. He wanted to do something nice for you.

I would be delighted too

I'd literally be over the moon.

If he doesn't want to play his part in cleaning and pay someone then let him get on with it.

Otherwise show him where the Hoover is.

Why is it your responsibility to clean?

I'd be so happy 😁 I'd love a cleaner

Few cleaners would "reorganise" things and go down to the detail of washing underpants.

Does his mother live nearby?

Sounds like a personal touch, so I'm wondering if it was a family member too ? I'm not sure if I'd be shamed into keeping it tidy or of I'd be relieved that this could be a regular event ?

Monica?

I would be delighted, unless he's making a point that you specifically haven't cleaned or tidied - why is it more your job than his?!

I have a cleaner, so I would be delighted that someone else had paid the weekly bill!

My cleaner doesn't do any of that stuff!

I’d have been overjoyed!

I’d be very pleased with a surprise like that. Why wouldn’t everyone?! It’s like him taking your car to be valeted as a surprise. I don’t see any issue here.

Do you live seperately? Lots of phrasing about "my" house etc.

I've never known a cleaner do laundry.

Where did he find a cleaner who does the washing and reorganises your stuff?
Also the cleaners I've had want detailed agreements about what will be done.
Hmmm
I'd want to know which cleaner he had employed

Oh yuck. I’d hate this. Why isn’t he taking equal responsibility for keeping the place up to a decent standard?

@NomDeQwerty My cleaner does our laundry