So,
Two weeks ago yesterday my Husband went to work as usual for the evening shift in a bar he runs. I woke startled Sunday morning to discover he had not come home. His mobile phone was switched off. Upon calling around worried I discovered that DH was in fact drinking and not working, and had gone off to play football that morning. By the time he got in touch it was 1.30pm. I had not heard from him in nearly twenty four hours and all he said was “sorry my phone died”. I was understandably angry. Following this DH disappeared. Didn’t come home and didn’t speak to me for four days. Ignored messages from the kids. Didn’t put money in the bank to cover rent a food.
We spoke on the Friday all day, managed to clear the air and he video called me late that night where we had phone sex. However, the next day he was back to ignoring me and said we were over.
Upon DH return from his parents where he was staying, he refused to speak to me. Refused to speak and sort our marriage out. But refused to sort out rent, bills, the bank, and all of responsibilities too. He left me to borrow money to buy food for our three teenage children. On Friday morning we agreed to meet at the bank. We sorted our account out and paid money in to cover bills. After he asked if he could come home and see the kids and our dogs. We sat and had a tea. Made small talk. And he asked if he had clean socks upstairs. As he went upstairs he made a big deal of saying that he wasn’t packing any of his clothes. When he left for work i was a bit emotional. It has been nearly two weeks since I had seen him and the longest we had been apart in five years.
We spent all afternoon and evening messaging, and he came round about 10pm. We had a talk. He said he loved me, missed me, found it really hard being apart. He wanted our marriage and wouldn’t leave again. He promised. We had sex, good sex, and slept holding each other.
The following morning we laid in bed having a cuddle and a chat. Spent the afternoon together and everything seemed fine. When my DH left for work he said he’d see me in the morning. Gave me a kiss. Said I love you and left. Well. I woke up again and he wasn’t there. He sent me a blunt text at 1.30am saying he was drinking with a football mate and staying there to leave for football in the morning. He did it again! When he finally messaged I asked if he was home later to which he said “I don’t think so. I am not sure what we should do for the best to be honest”. Followed by a please don’t be upset!
He didn’t come home, and stayed out drinking all day yesterday. Refused to speak to me. And today has said we were over two weeks ago!
I really don’t understand where he is coming from and why he is doing this. He won’t answer me what Friday was all about. He won’t discuss why he did that. He won’t talk to me. He won’t sort any of our responsibilities out either. It’s like he punishes me for his own behaviour. He has been drinking a lot over the last year. Only had nine alcohol free days this year. Drinks everyday. Regularly binge drinks. I honestly don’t know why he treats me like this. I am devastated. Five years of marriage. Our anniversary Wednesday. What do a I do? Now do I deal with this?