Being called 'good girl'

[SarahH19]

What is it with some men in calling woman a 'good girl'?

Am I being unreasonable to be offended?

I've only dated one man who has used this phase towards me but I have heard it a few times. But what's with it?

what else would they refer to them collectively as? What with them actually being girls and all?grin

I can't believe someone actually wrote this. I know the word "woman" is under threat but this is fucking ridiculous.

I can't believe someone actually wrote this. I know the word "woman" is under threat but this is fucking ridiculous

Amen.

“I don't know whether it's because where I live men are almost always boys or lads”

Really? So you would expect someone praising a 40 year old male employee to say “Good boy”. Or to refer to “The boy on reception”

Aye- right.

And the idea of being turned on by being called a “good girl” is worrying.

My DH calls other women this sometimes ... I think its an age thing. I have told him they are grown women not girls but he won't listen.

My mother will call women in their 40s 'girls' when talking about them, which I find baffling -- but I think in her case it's being male gaze acculturated to the idea that you're supposed to be thrilled at being called a girl, because it implies you're viewed as young, and that's a good thing. (Then again, this is the woman that cannot bear thirty seconds of a Mary Beard programme that she's not even watching because she cannot abide long and/or undyed hair on older women because they're 'not making the most of themselves'.

Men, on the other hand, acquire gravitas and authority with age.

I looked at good girl porn (well I didn’t ‘look’ at it, I saw the thumbnail), it’s worrying - ‘daddy’ role play.

'daddy' role play 🤢🤢

He will also use it sexually. I like it and have never found it to be derogatory

So when you're sucking his cock or whatever, he will call you a good girl?

Sounds creepy and patronising, but I suppose the world would be boring if women were seen as equals we all liked the same stuff.

My mum says it to me when I do something nice for her. She does it with my sisters as well.

I was also called a good girl by the midwife while in labour. I don't mind my mum saying it, but I was irritated by the midwife...who was also calling me poppet, but I was in too much pain and just wanted my baby out.

Funny that a man saying it is called misogynistic, but a woman isn't.

Man in my work always says "good girl". Hate it!

I hated it when my driving instructor (male) used it repeatedly during my lessons. I was still officially a girl but the patronising intent was clear.

Recently my new boss (female) has said it to me a couple of times, which is particularly weird because I’m pretty sure I’m older than her.

Out of the bedroom - fuck no! In the bedroom, yes please!

DP calls me this or "baby girl" as a piss take/to wind me up. Can't imagine him using it otherwise. Grim.

“Out of the bedroom - fuck no! In the bedroom, yes please!”

Yuck.

Can't imagine anything less appealing in the bedroom. I'm not a fucking Labrador.

‘Good girl’ in a sexual context always reminds me of Sharon’s too-drunk-for-consent encounter with creepy all fella Georgie Burgess in the film version of Roddy Doyle’s The Snapper. I think he says “Good girl, Sharon’, as he picks up her knickers afterwards. I cannot think of anything less sexy.

I like being submissive in the bedroom and Good Girl is a bit of a sign of play about to begin.

I find it sexy.

Because you don't neither makes it worrying or wrong.

It does funny things to me in the right context too, if I’m in a submissive mood in the bedroom - outside the bedroom it’s just bizarre unless talking to a child.

Fwiw, ‘good girl’ in the bedroom is quite appealing to me- anything ‘daddy’ related is nauseating and would kill my libido stone dead. Certainly for me there is no correlation

I say good boy to my partner whenever he does something a bit nice. Just as a sort of joke patronising but flirty kind of thing. He gets all bashful, it’s actually quite cute

Dp saying good girl during sex is more than OK with me.
Nothing to do with daddy stuff - yuckity yuck 🤮
Anyone else daring to call me that can fuck right off.

I knew a girl who used to say "good boy" to her boyfriend, they were about 19. She said it to him just like she was talking to a dog.

She was a condescending, smug arsehole though, so I guess he liked that.

I'm northern and the expression here "good girl" basically means "she's a really nice decent girl" nothing untoward about it to us

I'm northern and I sort of get what you're saying, although I wouldn't say there's always nothing untoward about it. It's all about context and intention isn't it?

I have had some one at work say it to me when I did something he liked and I was very pissed off. I think it was the way he said it.

N/b this is the same man who explained to me what post-apocalyptic meant, even though I never asked, and then talked over me when I said "I know what post-apocalyptic means".

If an expression is sexist it’s still sexist in a Northern accent.

I'm northern and the expression here "good girl" basically means "she's a really nice decent girl" nothing untoward about it to us

But what age of female human are you talking about? If she's actually a girl, then of course there's nothing untoward about it. If she's a grown adult, it's quite another matter.