Inlaws

[snoopy18]

In-laws are headed over staying for close to 6 weeks 🤦🏾‍♀️

Baby is almost 10 weeks so they are coming to visit.

Any tips on getting through 6 weeks?

Other half is off for 4 thankfully but isn’t a planner & right now... zero plans 🤦🏾‍♀️

[Sexnotgender]

Absolutely don’t pick up the slack, let HIM do all the cooking, cleaning and running around after them. They are his guests after all.

Do what you usually do, go meet friends for coffee (or go on your own with a book!), go to baby groups etc.

[IABUQueen]

Just be like “I wanted to give guy guys space away from the baby because he wakes you lot at night”

Before that make sure you put loudspeakers in their rooms magnifying baby cries.

Joking.

[frazzledasarock]

Or fake a stomach bug and clear off to your mums for the one of the two weeks your H is back at work.

You really wouldn’t want your in-laws catching it and all that.

[snoopy18]

Love that 😂 @IABUQueen his dad snores so much OMG been here since yesterday evening 🤦🏾‍♀️

@Sexnotgender totally with you on that one I’ve totally just been focussing in baby since they got here because I’m not setting the wrong expectations that way. He’s took them to the shops today and breakfast lunch etc. Think he realises now what I mean.

[Contraceptionismyfriend]

How did their night on the air bed go?

[snoopy18]

@Contraceptionismyfriend 🤷🏾‍♀️ They’re awake and functioning today albeit jet lag ... can’t believe they will sleep on that for their time here though 😳 OH has been hosting them and they are now cooking so I think so far they get it...

[NauseousMum]

Sounds promising, stick to your guns or your dh will never learn. Enjoy baby bonding time while he does everything.

[snoopy18]

I’ve stuck to my usual schedule today with him and they’ve not intervened thank god. They are trying to soothe baby when he cries but OH is jumping in and so am I though they are trying to do it. I’m not having it as baby gets super upset & I try my best to keep him as calm as possible. I think baby is stressed with so many people around so I have just been sticking to what we normally do as don’t want to upset him. OH looks after him in the evening while I sleep as I’m up overnight with him & all day so I’ve just come upstairs but made it v clear if he cries or won’t settle then to wake me up ASAP. I think he sees for himself now what I was trying to say to him about it all 🤦🏾‍♀️

They made dinner which is good because I don’t want to be cooking for 4 people and they are quite fussy with food from what OH has said and what I can gather. So I’m not even going to bother 😂

[fedup21]

What the hell is he going to do with them for 6 weeks??!

[Sexnotgender]

What the hell is he going to do with them for 6 weeks??!

That’s for him to figure out!

Glad you’re sticking to your schedule OP. Babies need consistency.

[rainbowstardrops]

You go girl!!!! How refreshing to read a thread where the mum stands her ground and does what is right for herself and baby and not act like a doormat and tolerate a really shit situation!
I mean, yeah come and visit to see your new grandchild but hell no to throwing your lives upside down to accommodate it!
You rock my girl!

[cstaff]

Snoopy I like your style. You go girl. Glad to see your husband is already coming around to your way of thinking. That didn't take too long, did it. This should make for an interesting 6 weeks - for us on mn obviously. Hopefully you can keep your sanity in the meantime.

[MarniLou]

Oh come on, they are not the enemy, these people are your family, your DS's grandparents. They can't even pick up my their grandson to sooth him???

[Cactus67]

6 fucking weeks in a two bed?
Think they’re all taking the piss tbh, this is no way for a new mum to adjust

[Contraceptionismyfriend]

They've invaded for 6 weeks.

They are the enemy.

[cstaff]

@contraception I live in a 2 bed house on my own. One extra person and I feel overcrowded. To have 5 people here I would lose my fucking mind and this is for 6 weeks. Oh Jeez. OP you will need all of these. Hopefully your cabinet is full to the brim.

[carly2803]

oh fuck that!! 6 weeks?!
new baby?!

no sorry - air b and b - this will end in tears!!

[Elllicam]

You are doing great so far OP, keep it going!

[Weenurse]

Well done 💐

[snoopy18]

They aren’t enemy you’re right but to stay at someone’s house immediate family or not for 6 weeks with a newborn is not the one. Babies don’t get soothed by strangers, they get more irritated & stressed or in my baby’s case this is what’s happening.

Yeah I refuse to cater to it all - I’ve booked some classes for him so we will get some us time too.

Yeah I’m super happy with how hubby is being at the moment but see how it goes.

They are getting bored already. Don’t think they considered that baby will be sleeping lots still at this point 🤷🏾‍♀️

[makkmiss]

How refreshing to read a thread where the OP doesn’t just surrender to her DH’s shit ideas and actually stands her ground for her and the baby! Well done!

I’m also Asian and although I don’t have any DC yet, my mum mentioned how she’d like to come and stay with me for 6 weeks after I have a baby just like her mother did. I told her not a chance!! They think they’re being helpful but not realising how much extra unnecessary stress they’re putting on you, which in turn is making baby stressy. Just stick to your routines and be polite without being over-accommodating. Let DH do all the hosting work since you’re recovering from birthing his child

[snoopy18]

@makkmiss it’s frustrating they are here even now - can’t imagine what it would have been like immediately after the baby arrived. Very glad it wasn’t immediately and good on you for already saying no thanks. It’s a precious time for parents and baby to bind without having extra bodies around. Sure they want to help and that’s a kind thought but practicality of it is nightmare!

I had family come and help drop off dinner etc and I was so thankful for that but it’s exhausting when they want to see and spend time with the baby and all you want to do is sleep and some self care time and spend time with baby especially when breast feeding.

It’s over whelming I found as kind as it is they want to help etc.

Yesterday I went to the cinema & took baby and dog for a walk twice. Other half has been bringing the baby up for BF as I do mix feed just now so I’m glad he’s being decent!

Feels like they have been here for ages already 🤦🏾‍♀️

[snoopy18]

Waking up at 1am then 4am and having randoms in the house is not the one 🙏🏾

[desparate4sleep]

How is it going today OP? Have they become bored enough to have booked a few nights somewhere else?

[Mamamiais]

My mum stayed with us for 4 weeks following my MIL for another two. Both were very helpful, although my MIL was very judgmental. My DH told her once to leave me be and she stopped. She was overall helping with baby, cooking and housework. It was better than visiting her with my baby as she was commenting that we let our baby to be too messy and too loud. Needless to say, I am not going to visit her soon.