He's left me very confused

[Cr20]

Hiya there , as you all seen before my ex text me saying he wasn't interested and didn't want an us and I accepted and just left as is and took all your advise.

Anyways I had our sons first birthday party on the 16th a few days after I posted about him saying that and he came with his mum and his brother and we co-parented for our child's sake to make it a good day for him. After that day we have been getting closer and closer , like he's been trying to text me a lot more and keeps messaging me out the blue a few days after not speaking that he misses our lo and to tell him that he loves him etc.

Anyways last Friday he went out with mates and asked to see lo as he's got a new job working away and only gets to see lo on a Saturday overnight. I agreed and he came over and was playing about with our son and then asked me to call him a taxi home which I did.

The taxi called to say it was outside and we walked him out and he kissed our son goodbye and then kissed my cheek and pulled me in and kissed me passionately on the lips. It all just happened out of the blue and so quickly I never even had the chance to say what you doing. He then says my taxi is there I need to go and that was it. He text me when he got in saying I just miss him so much when I don't get to see him. I never mentioned the kiss as I don't want it to ruin that we've just started getting along for lo.

But I'm left very confused and have mixed emotions. Is he confused ? Why'd you think he done it ??

Sorry I had to write and get it off my chest , been overthinking every night and it's messed with my head.

Playing fucking games.

I’m afraid to say I don’t think anyone replied to your other thread as you’re not listening to what anyone has told you in your previous threads about the same man. Im so sorry you are going through this as I know how soul destroying it is, but his actions are to keep you as an option for when he’s bored and nothing more. Im so sorry

He’s playing games because he knows that you will respond and then the cycle continues. You’re not confused, you’re desperate for him to be different but he isn’t and your refusal to accept that, will keep you in this loop.

You can’t move forward, looking back.

He doesn't like you getting independent of him, he likes to keep you on a string, and he's just smug about knowing he can get into your pants any time he wants.

He is messing you around.

For fuck's sake, how many times do you have to keep coming back here with this shit? You've posted about this bloke so many times, we've all told you the same things repeatedly, but you refuse to listen and come back posting yet again as if we're all suddenly going to have different replies for you.

Really, it's getting stupid now.

Jesus wept. Didn't realise it was you until Shatner pointed out.

He has been clear it's over. I am doubting whether the kiss was passionate at all.

You always read far too much into it. You have said in the past he does he mean what he says? Then go on to say his texts were saying it was over, done, not happening.

You still thought he wasnt been clear and might be hinting at a reconciliation.

Either you are trolling or you need some professional support.

Either you are trolling or you need some professional support

Or three) you actually really enjoy all this drama.

Either way, stop asking people to waste their time on your non-existent problem. There are people with genuine, serious relationship problems and real shit in their lives and our time is far better spent trying help and advise them than you.

Shatners, what a bitch.

Then don't reply shatners.
Horrible things to say.

@tessiegirl @Myheartbelongsto she's always been very negative and rude on my posts , I've learned just to ignore her as she's clearly a very angry aggressive person

I don't think it is just you though op. If you search his username he is frequently rude and abrupt to others.

@tessiegirl if you search the OP's username you will also find endless posts all about the same thing. Previously people have been very kind and taken time to give advice and help her. All to no avail, as she ignores any advice given, which is ok because advice given does not have to be advice taken. However Shatners and a few others have simply pointed this out to warn other people who may otherwise have taken the time to write a post here and subsequently be ignored by OP.

Why'd you think he done it??

To show you that you are still his property, and he can do what he likes with you.

I don't care if the op has numerous threads about the same thing tbh.
It's the way shatners was pretty nasty about it. Don't reply. Nobody is forcing you to reply! Let people make their own mind up about a thread.

Cheeky bitch eh, Shatner?

OP, I've never read any of your previous posts but what you're describing here is classic control and mind games.

The more you disengage with him, the more he'll want you. But, I can promise you that as soon as you give in to him and respond to his advances he'll be right back to the same shit person he was before.

He's using his son to charm his way back into your life. Not because he wants you back but just because he doesn't want to lose any control he has over you.

If you take him back, be prepared for a couple of days/weeks of shagging and then sit back and watch him turn nasty again. Is that really the type of man you want? And more importantly, think of the upset and confusion all this will have on your son.

Be strong OP and fuck him off. You'll look back on this in years to come and you'll kick yourself for being his puppet.

Good luck.

You posted this three times yesterday. That's in addition to months of ignoring advice given to you. Give it up.

tessiegirl I'm only abrupt when in my opinion (you are of course free to differ) people have made long and repeated attempts to help or get through to an OP and they continue the cycle without taking on board any sensible advice. Because sometimes it's a short sharp shock that finally makes an OP grasp what's going on. Assuming they are genuine. Been here eight years and seen the approach work. Not the only one who has resorted to it on occasion (thinks AnyFucker who is far more abrupt than I am). To say I am frequently rude though is patent nonsense.

It is ludicrous to keep posting repeated threads on the same subject (three on one day for example) and I am clearly not the only one exasperated by a poster who has no intention (which has been clearly demonstrated repeatedly) of listening to anyone who has tried to help her understand what this is all about.

There's none so blind as those that can't see.

Yeah, such a bitch, me single

Definitely playing games because he can. Disengage from him.

When you say lo do you mean little one? And is that your 16 year old or do you actually have a little one? If it's just your 16 year old then there's absolutely no reason to co parent or even have much contact over your child as they can make their own arrangements, unless the 16 year old has sen. Trickier if you actually do also have a little one but still possible.

I always rely on Shatners to do my research for me. The bitch is a stickler for detail.

But if you feel that way do not reply. Simples.

@tessiegirl Are you a meerkat? The fact is that there have been abundant threads over the years where an OP comes back time and time again, repeating the same stuff, never listening. It's only when some of us have been very blunt that it has made some of those OPs realise just what we have been talking about; it's taken very blunt speaking to make them accept the facts or to make them accept that coming here repeatedly bemoaning about some arsehole changes nothing and that if you want answers you actually need to a) accept that this arsehole IS an arsehole which is what we've all been saying for the last year and b) get off the keyboard and CHANGE IT. Often there are children caught up in this cycle of misery and who is speaking up for them? No one, because despite what an OP often says they aren't giving a thought to the children but their own selfishness and the latest arsehole they've brought home.

@Ameliant Sometimes it's doing research, sometimes it's having a very good memory

I'm with you @shatnerswig - it's absolutely infuriating to realise the poster you're attempting to support, advise etc is a chronic drama llama who has no intention of listening to any thing said to her/him. This OP has been posting about this for months and listens to no one. It's legitimate to call that out.

You weren't at all rude imo.