Is it possible for a man and a women to literally just be platonic friends?

[me88]

With no feelings or thoughts of something more. On both sides. Ever?

Your thoughts?

No, there's always an agenda from one side.

I have a very good male friend. We get on fantastically but there's no chemistry or attraction.

Dougster that comment is creepy and incredibly misogynist. So you only talk to women if you want to get in their pants? Charming.

People saying it’s difficult and feelings can develop - do you develop feelings for every member of the opposite sex you come into contact with regularly? The postman, your doctor, child’s teacher, your boss, people who work in your local shops? Of course you don’t.

If two people have personalities that gel, they share a sense of humour and are comfortable around each other and supportive of each other, they can be friends. Doesn’t matter what’s between their legs. I talk to my male and female friends exactly the same way!

Never had a friendship with a man who didn't want to take it further. So from personal experience, no.

I don’t know. I have male friends but they are generally husbands/partners of my friends (although i’ve known most of them as long as my female friends).
I have another male friend but I’m afraid I feel more than friendship towards him and have done for many years.

The line is just before where you say and do stuff that you wouldn't do in front of your partner

This ^

I have lots of male friends, I don't fancy them, and I'm sure they don't fancy me.
When you share interests and a sense of humour then you're likely to become friends, sexual attraction is very different.

My best friend is Male, we’ve been friends since we were 14. Been on holidays together, carried each other home drunk & even slept in the same bed. Nothing has ever happened between us & after 30 years I can’t see that suddenly changing.

I have several close male friends. I don't fancy them in the least and I know they aren't attracted that way to me either. What's the line? Heaven knows, never really thought about it.

As an adult - yes.

Different story when younger.

Absolutely. I think people who say it isn't are a bit weird, honestly. Do they really think about fucking every single person they know?

Yes I think so. I've got one very close male friend from primary school and I love him as a friend but nothing more. And a few others from uni, one from work and one whom is in Dp's group of friends, all I'd consider good friends. If I'm being completely honest I think one of the uni friends probably does or has fancied me although he's never said and I've been clear I don't. We have a lot of shared interests, we message and occasionally meet up but I'm more conscious of what I say with him than the others. My work friend is older and we just have a really good rapport but I definitely don't fancy him. He worried at first at how our friendship would be seen by others and he admitted after we'd been friends a few years he felt that people would think he was trying it on with the young new girl. He wasn't and hasn't. He's got a really good marriage though and he's really open and honest with his wife.

My Dp doesn't really have female friends, there's ones he knows in a group most of which go out with his friends. He thinks slightly differently to me and thinks most male friends will have thought about the possibility of sex, even if nothing else. He's ok with my friends because he trusts me, but he thinks most of them would sleep with me if the opportunity was there and we were both single. I think that's mostly because we were friends first and he'd secretly thought about it for a long time. Which I didn't actually know so maybe I just don't notice it, but I think he's wrong.

For me, l always end up wanting more. So now quite sure how to answer this.

Yes. I have many male friends through my theatre group and don't feel anything for any of them.

I’ve never managed it myself.

I actually think it's exactly when there is a shared sense of humour and common interests that feelings are most likely to develop.

I have had some male friends who ended up wanting more. What can I say. I'm gorgeous.

Yes of course. Some of my best friends are male. My DH knows them and gets on well with them. We hang out with and without my DH - just as he does with his friends, sometimes I join them for a drink, sometimes I don’t!

I think the key thing is that I wouldn’t act any differently with my male friends whether my DH was there or not. My DH and each other trust each other so there’s never been any issues around this. He had a very good friend who was female when we met (they’ve sort of drifted apart now but that’s just life). Last year went on holiday just me and three male friends.

Every single male friend I’ve ever had has made a pass. I realised the other day, the only male Facebook friends I have are relatives or gay.

I haven't managed it myself either. I thought I had a great male friend recently. It started off innocently, then turned explosive a year ago and rocked my world apart, and I haven't yet recovered.

Yes , I used to have a lot of male friends when younger. Nothing ever happened or wished it would happen, and we got blind drunk together, slept in the same beds etc.

I'd say I have slightly more close male friends than female, and I can honestly say there have never been any moments where things crossed the line to not being platonic with any of them. We are all just humans who like and enjoy each others company, and maleness or femaleness isn't a consideration.

Of course. And I agree with previous posters that it's depressing and weird that some people think it isn't, as if they've signed up to a hardcore fundamentalist religious worldview that only requires people of the opposite sex to be in the same space for them to leap upon one another.

As regards your question about emotional affairs, I disagree with large numbers of Mumsnetters on this. What people on here decry as an 'emotional affair' seems to me to overlap with the category of 'close friendship'. Things which are completely normal for me and my male best friend seeing each other one on one regularly, affectionate messages, going out for dinner together etc are often seen as betraying a spouse on here.

Why are you asking OP?

Of course it is.

Totally depends on their personality and how susceptible to attention from the opposite sex they are.
Good ppl with decent boundaries, or those who don't fancy each other, yes.
Ppl who revel in attention or validation from others, probably not.