Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Husband sexting another girl

99 replies

02gurro · 08/02/2019 06:27

Hi everyone, I haven't slept all night, I'm absolutely heartbroken and just want this to go away 😢 I found out yesterday that my husband (aged 23) has been sexting a 16 year old girl who's still at school, she sought me out and sent me screenshots but previously told me 5 days, ago I just didn't believe it as I thought he'd never do that to me, even after seeing evidence yesterday he spent hours denying it lying until he had to give in. We only married 3 months ago I'm devistated! We're both so happy and I always thought I'm one of the lucky girls who has a guy that thinks the world of his partner and would never cheat. We are literally each others best friends. I just found out Im pregnant aswell yesterday with our first (I have a 6 Yr old already) we've been trying since the wedding and was so excited to begin our married life together. I don't know what to do now 😭 I've been treated badly in my past relationships too and he knew this. He's been messaging her when I'm in the room with him or asleep, even when we got home from viewing a property together and before/after a romantic date. To top it off he's been bringing up he's married to make the conversation naughty and she's even said stuff like she'd f**k him better than his wife. He found her first and messaged her when I was asleep on the sofa tired from becoming pregnant which I didn't know at the time. She's just a stranger off the Internet why would he be so desperate when his home life/sex life is so good! I moved away with him aswell and now live someone with no family or friends I'm completely alone. Humiliated to say the least that my family attended our wedding recently and everyone loves him.

OP posts:
Canthearthroughmyglasses · 08/02/2019 06:40

I am sorry to hear this. Have you told him you know?

MumsyJ · 08/02/2019 06:45

Oh no OP, so sorry about this. Where on earth did he meet her and did he not know she's underage?

Some people can be less appreciative of the good thing they've got at home. What a betrayal!

I really don't know what to say OP, but please look after yourself, considering your early stage. What an idiot to have made you feel this way. Flowers

ScrumptiousBears · 08/02/2019 06:48

Does he know she is only 16?

It doesn't bode well OP.

FissionChip5 · 08/02/2019 06:53

Sexting with an adult I might forgive, but sexting a child? Nope, that’s disgusting and unforgivable. Poor girl being taken advantage of by a creep.

Sarahjconnor · 08/02/2019 06:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

QueenOfTheCroneAge · 08/02/2019 07:02

I would think very carefully about bringing another child into this mess, OP.

Variousartists · 08/02/2019 07:28

Not good. In fact pretty disgusting.

Deathgrip · 08/02/2019 07:33

I’m so sorry OP, that’s horrendous. She is a child - what a disgusting piece of shit.

You have no need to feel embarrassed, you’re not the one who’s done anything wrong. It sounds like you have a really good relationship and yet he still felt compelled to do this - I would need to ask him why but not convinced you’d get an honest answer.

Is there anyone you can stay with, a friend or family member? I think you need a bit of distance to figure out what to do.

ZenNudist · 08/02/2019 07:35

LTB

froggy1811 · 08/02/2019 07:46

You poor love!Flowers

May I ask how old you are, and how old is he? Because 16 is a child, and tbh this sounds utterly revolting!

froggy1811 · 08/02/2019 07:51

My apologies OP, I just read your post properly and can see that you have stated he's 23.

Why on earth a 16 year old child? I mean, it's bad enough he's betrayed you this way and I'd be concerned enough by that fact alone! I'd be doubly dubious about him 'sexting' a school girl though!

I know it's tremendously hard for you hun, but I think this is one of those straight forward cases where you need to say goodbye. X

mayathebeealldaylong · 08/02/2019 07:54

Under 18 and images he can get in a lot of trouble and be put on a list.
You need to really see this action for what it is, it's not a mistake it's relationship destroying and illegal.

Whatdoyouknowwhenyouknownowt · 08/02/2019 07:56

If he's sent dick pics, he's in trouble if he's reported. 18 is the legal age for images not 16.

On very, very dodgy ground...

DianaT1969 · 08/02/2019 07:58

Can you support yourself if you end up going through this pregnancy as a single parent?

There's no excuse for what he has done. Do you think he was mature enough at 23 to get married, become a step father to a 6 year old and then have a new baby? It all seems very rushed.

froggy1811 · 08/02/2019 08:01

Couldn't agree more.

This lady needs to get rid...

ShatnersWig · 08/02/2019 08:07

How old are you OP?

And how did she track you down?

And why did she track you down?

Shoxfordian · 08/02/2019 08:12

Its unforgivable and you need to divorce him

SauvignonMum · 08/02/2019 08:16

How did she track you down? Why did she become angry at him and send you screenshots?
Did they go as far as meeting up?

You poor thing. I think you'll need to confide in someone. It's too much for you to deal with on your own, being pregnant as well

Homer101 · 08/02/2019 08:29

So he is basically grooming a child online, for your own and your child’s safety to need to leave this relationship. With an adult you could put it down to a bit of fun and nothing more to it , you could forget and move on. But doing this with a child ? Massive red flag that there’s more to this man than you know and non of it is good. You need to report him to the police. They can then investigate to see if he has crossed a line and broken the law.

Babdoc · 08/02/2019 08:37

In your shoes, OP, I’d choose a termination of pregnancy, a divorce, and move back nearer to friends and family. You sound like you’ve given up everything for this shit of a man.
And take any future relationships very slowly, to get to know the chap thoroughly before making any commitment.
It might also be worth having some counselling, to see why you choose unsuitable partners.
I’m so sorry you’re having to deal with all this.

Springwalk · 08/02/2019 08:41

Op, be glad you have found out now and not twenty years down the line.
You will feel devastated now of course, but in time you will be glad that you did not have children with this man. You are right to be disgusted, she is a child.

Move back home, tell your family he is not a good man, they can support you. You have had a lucky escape, you will see that in time,

FabulouslyFab · 08/02/2019 08:42

Babdoc
“In your shoes, OP, I’d choose a termination of pregnancy,”
Seriously?? That’s dreadful Shock

Strugglingtodomybest · 08/02/2019 08:46

FabulouslyFab

Babdoc
“In your shoes, OP, I’d choose a termination of pregnancy,”
Seriously?? That’s dreadful

Is it? Why? I would too.

froggy1811 · 08/02/2019 08:50

She doesn't need to terminate her pregnancy (unless she wants to!) But she does need to terminate her relationship with this vile pearl!

Strugglingtodomybest · 08/02/2019 08:50

OP, I really feel for you, what a terrible position to find yourself in Flowers

I don't blame you for feeling humiliated, but remember, this is all his fault. Get angry, he has caused all this! Anyone in rl who hears what he has done will be grossed out, no-one will be blaming you.

Ltb, move home and move on with you life. Easier said than done but I wish you luck whatever you decide.

Swipe left for the next trending thread