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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Husband had an affair

113 replies

RDOlem · 05/02/2019 17:18

Just found out my husband has been having an affair and I'm devastated. I feel sick, I feel gutted and I feel absolutely heartbroken 😰
He told me about a fortnight ago he wasn't happy and hadn't been happy for a few months. Said he needed time to get his head together. I so didn't see it coming. I admit it hasn't been great, we've both been so busy. We have three small children, I had a lot of work pressures going on and he works away 3/4 days a week. We'd forgotten to make time for each other.
I was shocked with this revelation but gave him his time to get his head together, however on on Thursday he left his work phone behind and all became clear... my worst nightmare became a reality. He was having an affair with a work colleague 😰
When he got home and I challenged him, at first he denied it - but eventually admitted he was having an affair... he claims she started out as a confidante but developed into an intimate relationship. He tells me this only started a month ago...
I have never felt pain like it.
He's ended it with her and wants to repair and rebuild our marriage, but I feel he still has feelings for her. I love my husband but I bloody hate what he's done to me and our family. I'm numb 😰

OP posts:
Orange6904 · 06/02/2019 13:40

Keep getting support from friends and don't be rushed into anything. x

desperatesux · 06/02/2019 14:02

It was only going on a month yet they were both planning to leave and set up together. I don't for a second believe it was only going on for a month, unless they were spending every waking moment together it is simply not possible to get that involved that you would leave your whole life behind in a month, Going on much much longer me thinks

Also going to be much harder to move past it if she is still pursuing him (which she is) - he has shown he has no will power. Personally I would cut my losses

Chinks123 · 06/02/2019 14:09

It is possible for people to get that involved in a month. I was only seeing this guy for a few weeks when he said he loved me, wanted me forever etc. I think when the guy knows in the back of their mind it’s false and he won’t actually do it, it’s easier to promise all these things.

Dragonboobs · 06/02/2019 14:29

I haven’t read the whole thread but I have been in your shoes. I second surviving infidelity website. Read the healing library and get your husband to read it too. My husband proves himself everyday and we have reconciled.

RDOlem · 06/02/2019 14:57

@Dragonboobs
I've joined, is it the articles list under the healing library?
And I'm so happy you left a message, I hope we can survive this too 😞

OP posts:
SandyY2K · 06/02/2019 15:02

If he is serious about reconciliation...he needs to look for another job.

I also wonder...why he's suddenly gone from not being sure..to wanting to do anything......despite making plans with the OW.

Were they just plans to meet up or plans for a future together?

I agree that he needs to feel what losing you would be like. If you just roll over...he's basically gotten away with no consequences.

MsDogLady · 06/02/2019 15:07

Protect him?
I wouldn’t collude with my betrayer to keep his dirty secret. Are you trying to please him?

He has deeply wounded you. Why should you take responsibility for protecting him from painful consequences?

By informing his parents and your parents, you would be creating accountability for him and gaining much needed support for yourself. Actually, he should be required to tell his parents.

Bring the TRUTH out of the darkness and confront it head on. He was happy to deceive and demean you by sharing intimacy with the OW and telling her that he would leave you.

Dragonboobs · 06/02/2019 15:12

Yes the articles are really helpful. The forums are also helpful. I read so much and also wrote down a lot down. I made my husband tell his mother (the night he told me, as I kicked him out to start with) and she was very supportive of me. I relied on my best friend and sister too.

RDOlem · 06/02/2019 15:38

I hear you.....
but I'm scared, I'm shocked, I'm heartbroken. And I'm going through those motions you're warning me not to...
the more I read though, the stronger I feel.
Thank you all so so much, this forum is a saviour x

OP posts:
importantkath · 06/02/2019 16:02
Thanks
Flippinflipflaps · 06/02/2019 16:50

My partner had a one night stand, similar to your story, young children, work stress. I knew something was up and had been badgering him.
He confessed, though to start with he said he had just met someone who made him question his feelings etc etc.🤨

We had a couple of days apart before deciding to try again. I wish I had sent him away for long story. I knew he was lying, it was months of trickle truth.

4 years later we are still together, he tries really hard, but I will never feel the same. I have done lots for me and have lots of new interests and friends.

I don't trust him anymore, not in the sense that he will go chasing his cock again, but that if we were in a bad place again he would put himself above his family.

I think with hindsight I should behave left. I am now in the situation that it is not bad enough yo leave. Disappointment doesn't seem a good enough excuse to leave a relationship.

Flippinflipflaps · 06/02/2019 16:53

Sorry for typos, my phone is really hard to type on and as for auto correct 😠🥴

claraschu · 06/02/2019 17:16

I think Esther Perel is really helpful for understanding and coming to terms with infidelity and helping marriages to survive affairs.

Here is one of her talks- please do listen and see if it might be helpful for you.

MsDogLady · 06/02/2019 17:34

He tells me he got sucked in and just went with it.

Nonsense. Did the OW zap him with a spell, leaving him with no control?

He is minimizing his decision to cheat, pretending to be a passive bystander. He is not taking full responsibility. This does not bode well.

Taking Full Responsibility
-Acknowledging that he wanted to cheat with this woman. He chose to have emotional and physical intimacy with her.

-It is his job to determine why he had the affair. What were his motivations, excuses and circumstances that allowed him to cross the sacred line? Counseling would help him investigate this.

-How does he plan to strengthen his boundaries when the above triggers pop up again?

-It is irresponsible to promise to not cheat again when he hasn’t worked out why he cheated in the first place. Remorse is not enough to truly strengthen boundaries. Regret is not a reliable preventative.

Whatever ever his issues were, there was absolutely no justification for his having an affair. He created the distance between you the past few months. He was cheating.

safetyfreak · 06/02/2019 17:51

Interesting...I guess they had made plans to leave their spouses for each other. The OW did this by telling her husband the truth while your husband decided to string you and the ow along while he made his choice.

I would still be wary OP. The OW is single now, there is a great chance your husband will still go back to her.

This is not over.

Dancingtothemusicoftime · 06/02/2019 18:51

Safetyfreak, I entirely agree with you. My H had left his OW in no doubt that he would be leaving me for her - they even looked at houses together and bigger cars which could accommodate our three DC and her three...

When I found out and he told her I knew she immediately told her husband and went to her parents to wait for my H to 'collect her'. Meanwhile he is busy minimising it to me...

Once she realised that the arrival of the knight on a white charger was going to be a bit delayed she went all out - really all out - to destroy me first, both personally and professionally (we worked in the same organisation) and then after that - after my H had really broken it off with her, which took a while in reality, whatever he said to my face to the contrary - she put the boot into him professionally.

The impact of her campaign against me and then him has been incalculable, both in terms of my overall professional and personal self-confidence but also his career. It was his fault, I hold him entirely responsible , but it's another aspect of the very profound consequences these affairs can sometimes lead to.

It's a lie that your DH has only been with her a month. They are far, far too involved for that to be the case. My H told me it was 'six weeks' but I later found out that it was many months. And before they became physically intimate there had been a slow burn over a couple of years as they too worked together.

Please remember that he has lied to you without compunction all the time you didn't know. He obviously did that very easily and very convincingly. This is the same man you are now relying on to tell you the unvarnished truth.... I thought I really knew my husband, also one of the 'good guys', inside and out. I was wrong. Please don't be me.

CatnissEverdene · 06/02/2019 19:08

I think you need to seek a professional on this. He's going to gaslight the hell out of you. How can you trust a word that comes out of his mouth when he's been lying to you for months?

Talk it through on your own with someone who can help you make sense of what you are feeling. Do not for one second blame yourself for "neglecting" him - you have a young family that he is equally part of, only his idea of being a Dad is to stick his dick in someone else when the going gets tough.

You are the one in control now. You decide IF you want to try again, not him. You decide if you can forgive. He's lost any rights with you. Don't forget that Flowers

ImNotKitten · 06/02/2019 19:32

MsDogLadys posts are spot on.

He told me about a fortnight ago he wasn't happy and hadn't been happy for a few months. Said he needed time to get his head together

But now all of a sudden he definitely wants to work things out with you? Either he’s lying or he’s panicking. Both have horrible implications for you. He isn’t being genuine, if he was he would admit why he did it (he didn’t get sucked in, it was a conscious choice).

This is so much worse than a random one night stand even though both are revolting. He has repeatedly and deviously set about building an emotional and physical connection with her. Thinking about her and making plans with her. His deceit has been ongoing, not a one off mistake. He would still be at it now if you hadn’t found what was on his phone.

I wouldn’t be able to ever trust him again.

Sassyk · 06/02/2019 19:52

Op I so feel for you.
Last year I was in your position and quite honestly it was probably the most horrendous time I’ve had. I didn’t eat for days, I couldn’t look after myself let alone by DD.
However we are in the process of rebuilding our relationship, very slowly and it is incredibly hard. Very few people will tell you they have survived an affair and it’s not been a mistake to stay in the relationship. I don’t have the answer for my own relationship; all I can tell you is I believe the affair has ended and I believe he wants it to work. That doesn’t stop me feeling paranoid sometimes and extremely hurt, it’s got easier but I’m not sure if we’ll survive.
Like someone else said only you know you relationship and marriage but whatever you do remember your worth and his affair was no reflection on you. I did the same as you, children, working and no time for each other. But ultimately he made a conscious decision to have an affair rather than work at the relationship, he took the easy route. And for me it’s more about, if things get tough again will he look for the easy route out?
Please look after yourself Flowers

Iamnobirdandnonetensnaresme · 06/02/2019 20:06

FlowersGin

I’m sorry op.
I’m one year out from my ‘bestfriend’ Telling me about the affair she and my ‘d’H had 9years ago.
There is no pain like it.

  1. Eat
  2. Give yourself some space- leave him to deal with the kids, visit a friend for a few days and do something fun.
  3. Start being selfish
  4. You don’t have to make any decisions right now.

I’m a year out, I’m better but broken, I have no trust for anyone. I don’t feel the same way about him and he is less in my eyes, I can’t say that when my kids are older I won’t leave him.
In a weird way I think our relationship is better than it has ever been, more open and affectionate but I feel like I’m waiting for that bubble to burst.

Your husband needs to read the book ‘how to help your spouse heal from your affair’
He needs to find a new job.
He needs to make you feel safe.
Survivinginfidelity.com is a good site

Be kind to yourself

SandyY2K · 06/02/2019 20:29

I agree about not telling your family if you wish to reconcile.

I know if I told my family they wouldn't feel close to treat my H the same again.

He'd get squeezed out of lots of stuff in the future.

It depends on your family.

I met a man who told me he had an affair and his wife's family were told. He said it really brought home what he'd done when he had to apologise to her parents and siblings for the pain he caused her.

There's no right or wrong.

WhoKnewBeefStew · 06/02/2019 20:50

So sorry Op. Flowers

The reason you were having a shit marriage is because he was having an affair, he didn’t have the affair because you were having a shit time.

Please tell family and friends, they will help you. Don’t protect him by not telling people. He has to deal with ALL the fall out of his behaviour

RDOlem · 06/02/2019 20:54

I cannot thank you all enough, your words of wisdom and advice are what's keeping me going. I am seeing a counsellor on Monday - And he has agreed to arrange himself an appointment. He has also agreed to answer any questions I have. Maybe he'll lie, maybe he'll tell the truth but I will give him the opportunity. I will take some time to get my head together, I will likely commit to attempting to reconcile, because I love him but I love my children even more.
I don't know what will happen but I have to try...
albeit will enter this with my eyes wide open, and be as brave and strong as I possibly can.
I'm looking forward to the counselling, I need to talk this out.
I thank you all for your counsel, these last few days have been the worst of my life but sharing it here has helped me no end and for that I am so grateful xxx

OP posts:
desperatesux · 06/02/2019 22:01

Even if you are committing to reconciling I wouldn't be telling him that. This is all too easy for him and all on his terms. There is no threat to losing you so whats stopping him keeping it going until he gets bored, or leaves you for her.
You must kick him out, even short term to get some distance and clarity. He will also reveal if he goes running into her arms. Really think you are playing this all wrong, especially if you want things to work out. You are desperate, which I understand but he will be able to smell it a mile off

Ferfeckssake · 06/02/2019 23:53

Just being able to make a decision to actually DO something is a huge step in your recovery.
I too relied on MN at the time as it was my only outlet. Wish there was a RL equivalent .I really appreciated hearing from women who were going through the same feelings - made me feel more " normal" .And benefited greatly from advice of those who had already been there. Even if they stayed or not.
Brace yourself for hearing unpleasant things - but they can't be worse than your imaginings. And tell him to tell the OW to fuck off.NO CONTACT means just that or he is failing at the first hurdle.
If he really is remorseful and wants to stay married , he too has to suffer the consequences of his actions.
FlowersI wish you all the best .Would love to give you a hug - get your friends to.
Hope that you too, in 4 weeks time are in a better place mentally, no matter what you decide to do.Maybe update?

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