The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Step Into Our Christmas Thread!

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

A HUGE welcome to the Bus!

This is the one and only Gerald. Over the years, we've travelled far and wide gathering some truly remarkable Babes along the way, all of whom have been (and remain to be) at different stages of their own personal journey to sobriety or controlled drinking, depending on what it is that they want to achieve.

We have those who drink daily, those who drink occasionally, and also those who have been sober for some time. The one thing that you won't find here, is any judgey knickers! We're ALL here because at one point or another, we've hit our own "rock bottom" and then smashed the shit out of the FUCK IT button! (makes a note to order a new FUCK IT button)

This is without doubt one of the hardest times of the year for many of us, what with Christmas parties, alcohol on tap, supermarkets who have offers galore of various tipples stacked from floor to ceiling, and EVERY advert on TV shows you what an amazingly cool person you can be if you were drinking whatever brand of alcohol they're flogging! Even Christmas puddings and Brandy creams are tempting fate because as soon as you digest even a small amount of alcohol, it makes your body crave more, just like smoking, medication and recreational drugs................

Then there's the gifts that you're given! Champagne Truffles, Liquors, wines, spirits, you name it! So unless you've told people about your planned journey, people assume that buying gifts like that completely acceptable. So, some may feel obliged to consume such gifts and why not? It's Christmas after all. Then we have the New Year festivities..... parties, friends and family over to have drinks because you'll stop drinking after New Years' Day won't you?

It's so damn hard not to drink if that's what you've been doing all year anyway before you even reach this time of year!! How will you cope with your Great Aunt who will check for dust by running finger over ever surface, or Uncle knobhead who will be there in his cream suit, with that suspicious stain on it and his burgundy shirt asking for a Babycham! Also, let's not forget the in-laws/out-laws! We can sometimes put so much pressure on ourselves that we convince ourselves that we DESERVE that glass or seven of wine etc.

At the end of the day, if you want to drink, then you will. I appreciate that doesn't sound supportive but it's certainly true in my case. As I have said before, the most amazing thing about this Bus and those who travel along with it, is the fact that every single one on board has a story, a reason why they're here, and we all need support in one form or another. Yes, alcohol may be the one thing that we ALL have in common but it goes way deeper than that doesn't it? Life, love and laundry for a start!

Even if you're not ready to stop or cut down on your drinking yet, that's fine! You're still welcome to hop aboard the marvellous Gerald. We're a very varied bunch of Babes but we welcome anyone in need of support, even if you're not ready to say everything that you want to yet, or you feel the need to name change, that's fine! Just know that we're here for YOU for as long as you need to be.

Mouse xxx

THIS IS THE PREVIOUS THREAD IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO CATCH UP FROM WHERE WE LEFT OFF

Hey guys! Just checking in to see how you all are. Another positive step taken in a new me...I'm currently sat in the solicitors office getting my divorce application signed.

Don’t beat yourself up Time, it’s happened to us all. Just try not to drink today. Keep posting if it’s a good distraction, there are a lot of babes on board at the moment.

Oh Venus, thanks for the beautiful photo of the Kingdom, made me miss it so much.

I wanted to share this latest post from Belle, it’s a bit long so bear with me, I just love the idea of sobriety as a long car journey.

“I’ve always equated being sober with driving across the country, from Maine to San Francisco (or from Plymouth to Inverness-ish here).

you start off, you head in the right general direction, you make a bunch of small decisions every day. you adjust your course every day. you look at maps, aim, recalculate. you add in more sleep when required, more fuel when required, and you have faith that if you put in the days, let the calendar pages flip over, one after the other, that you can arrive in a new place.

and, importantly, it's a new place that you can't see when you begin AND you cannot adequately know or understand until you get there.

the advantage to having a day-by-day approach, though, is that you can do all the small adjustings required. you're not just plopped in the middle of the new place, unprepared. you get to practise your self-care each day, refining the process. you get to deal with smaller hurdles before larger ones come. you learn about prelapse so that you can prevent it. you learn when to put gas in your sober car and when to have a snack.

it's in the travelling that you are preparing. it's in the travelling that you're learning what you need to know.”

I absolutely love that margie

What a fab way of describing it! Day 2 here, quite chuffed with myself. I’m a work in process for sure.

mint I haven’t read back, but what are you doing these days. Did you ever get back into vet nursing? X

Last year she was a tiny puppy...

Now she's all grown up, her bag is packed and she's off to the grown up school to train as a guide dog [proud] and 😢

CuileanDubh Yep. A fantastic place with amazing people. Couldn't ask for a better job. They were fantastic when my Mum died 5 months ago. And I'm finally learning to drive too.

venusandmars Now that's a whole lot of awwwwwwwww.

Oh Venus she looks so grown up and responsible. Such a wise look on her face. It’s heartbreaking but brilliant as well.

Mint, I'm so glad about the support at work, that's fab. You sound super strong - just fab.

Venus, ohhhhh my heart hurts even looking at her and having to say goodbye so heaven knows how you must feel! But what a wonderful thing to do, and what a wise and lovely looking lady she is.

Beaches really hope you're feeling better and Ma that you are ok, what a crap feeling yesterday.

I'm ok - this is all, cautiously, becoming the new normal. Which is good in many ways but bad in that I am less zingy and zealous about it which means that temptation is more likely to creep in. Sweet, I've nicked your £5 a day idea which is great - thank you! Hope you're doing ok and not working too hard.

I've run and done yoga today and am doing Pilates in the morning. For anyone who knows me, this is all just extraordinary - I have spent my first half decade in total denial of any kind of exercise. I do find having running and steps competitions with friends is a massive incentive (I am categorically not competitive. Not at all).

Anyone tracking their sleep - can you let me know if you see a big difference in your sleep patterns when not drinking? I don't think my app is very sensitive and we all know that alcohol wrecks your sleep - but even so, I remain astonished that I have clear, big chunks of deep and light sleep since 1 Jan, whereas before i would veer from one to the other loads of times (like, 30 or 40) during the night - now it is only 7 or 8. Sorry, I know I have banged on about this before, but I am mesmerised by it. Mind you, I am so mindful these days wtih all my meditation apps and what have you that I could easily be mesmerised by my big toe for several hours.

Hope everyone is ok.

PS Trust I meant to say thank you to you for your thoughtful message yesterday. The short answer is I don't know what I am looking for but am going to take time to let it come to me, rather than shoehorning activities and new things in for the sake of it. That's the idea, anyway. Hope all's well with you.

Goodness you are all so good at name checking, you put me to shame. mint well bloody well done you!! I can't believe how much you have gone through since you joined the bus and look at you!!!

Thanks for all the kind messages. A better day today. Ceiling still damp and DH still a tosser but life goes on. Finished Week 1 of C25K, which is unbelievable. Definitley a bit less flubbery and wobbly. Was craving something sweet so DS kindly made me a mug of hot chocolate. probably blown the diet but better than a bottle of wine. Day 9 and nearly into double figures!

venus she is gorgeous! Looks just like the one I lost in November. You must be so proud of her.

mint well done you, so many milestones for you.

Day 3 (or 5/8) done here. I feel less bloated but thick headed. I’m sleeping better.
Watched part 2 of Luther tonight so hopefully no nightmares, just dreams of Idris. ❤️

Night all

HAPPY NEW YEAR BABES!!

I hope all is well with you all

I’m having a really hard time of things lately because Nemo isn’t sleeping and is scared of something but we’ve no idea what. He’s lay in my arms since NYD and sobbed, begging me not to let him fall asleep and we just don’t know what to do or where to turn so life’s super tough right now. I’ve lost so much weight because I’m simply not hungry and sleeping to rest when I can.

Thank goodness I’m not drinking as I used to. It breaks my heart and Mr.Mouse is super exhausted as he’s got to work and take care of us all.

In other news...........

DD passed her driving test yesterday first time!! We are so super proud of her, as she’s also been having to revise and do assignments for her degree to become a teacher

I hope to be more supportive once we’ve got our darling boy the help he needs.

Much love and support,

Mouse xxx

Sending love to the babes, Mouse I hope things settle with Nemo’s sleep. Bloody well done to your daughter!

Smallfox. Sleep improved for me really quickly when I stopped drinking - the lack of waking at 3am with The Fear helped - and over time I’ve noticed I recall more dreams. My REM sleep generally is a bit all over the place tho’ due to the menopause. Not sure if that’s much help? I do feel more rested from my sleep now and am better at getting going in the mornings.

Hey babes. Reading back and really want to NC but my laptop is away being fixed and too annoying to type on my phone. Still got bad back and frustrated at lack of exercise... got chiropractor appointment on Saturday (private, bloody expensive). Will NC properly when I get my laptop back but loving the dog pics

Fingers crossed the chiropractor has magic hands hope and gets you back into an exercise ready state.

Venus that fat puppy picture! . It must be hard sending her off to the next step but what a wonderful year spent getting her ready.

small normally I am very interested in sleep patterns but at the moment being ill means mine are screwed anyway, even without the wine. I know last year I noticed my bpm dropped by around 10 when I wasn’t drinking. (Not sure if you watch that also)

ma if a hot chocolate is enough to blow the diet then we are all doomed.

Mouse poor little Nemo, I wonder what has got him so shook up. Remember to take care of yourself as you take care of him. X

Waves to slings, crafty, mint, trust, sweet, dubh, Margie and time. I know there are heaps more than that but you are all on an earlier page and I can’t scroll back. Have a good day.

Hi all, still hanging o in there, but I have loads of work to get done before term starts and I'm in hospital for a small op tomorrow so I need to get stuff done so I have the weekend to recuperate. So sorry not to NC, but you are all AWESOME!

Thanks Beaches . Me too. I failed and had a G&T last night cos so out of sorts at missing gym and putting on weight over Xmas and not being able to address it. I realise this is the most feeble excuse EVER . Back on it today anyway. (And off the endless self pitying snacks).

Sweet hope your op goes OK and Ma ... I know that sitting in the car outside the house feeling so well. Your WB is a twunt for lending £200 to someone before Christmas. Can you pawn something of his to recoup the cost until he has the spine to ask for it back? Arse! At work now so have to go but hugs to all babes and apologies for being the Dry January dunce and failing dismally

Hope, just one day,, and you're back on track now. It's so easy to get distracted.

I'm on my last bottle of Limited Edition Fevertree Clementine tonic, which means Christmas is definitely over - so Spring must be on its way (please?).

We're heading into double AF days for DJers, we need to be watchful, it's one of those moments when the WW starts whispering about rewards!

Evening everyone!

Thursday is the start of my weekend but I’m too tired to even think about drinking tonight.

venus what a lovely dog- I sponsor Guide dogs and I feel sad when a puppy graduates so can only imagine how you feel.

sweet I love fevertree but haven’t seen the clementine so I will look out for this.

Any sober plans for weekend? I’m thinking early nights and long lie ins! We have thick icy fog here tonight so I might not leave the house!

still dry here. Don't let one day spoil it hope
got shit news today that my lovely lovely boss is leaving in April. We share an office and a sense of humour. he's become a good friend, mentor and confidant. Am absolutely gutted. He's a big part of why I love my job so much....

hope count the dry days, ignore the blips.

sweet that clementine fevertree is lovely, I bought one bottle before Christmas and when I went back for more it had sold out everywhere. I’ll stock up early next time.

ma shame about your lovely boss leaving, but maybe you’ll get another lovely one?

Day 4 done this week, 2 last week so 6/10. My personal best for a long time.

efc, it's a Christmas special flavour, and was the last bottle in the shop!

Ma whoop whoop! day ten done for your then? I know how you feel about a good colleague leaving. I spent years working with people I didn't really like and was then literally saved by two wonderful people in another department. I live in fear of either of them leaving, though with. the state of academia at the moment it's unlikely.

Well done Slings, are you using an app to keep track? I found last years DJ app (now called Dry Days) good because even when I fell off the wagon, I could see I had done almost half of the year dry in a couple big stints of a month or more at a time, and some odd days and weeks. It made me feel I have made progress on the year before.

Any way, time for bed, I can hardly keep my eyes open. Night Babes.

Morning,
sweet yes, I’ve got the dry January app. It’s good seeing the units, money and calories saved. They mount up.

Morning! One of my new year resolutions is to be on MN a bit more to cheer you all on. I miss you lot, I've been hanging out on the bereavement boards as I didn't want to depress anyone.
Still AF and still can't quite believe that I have made it this far.
I wish weight loss would hit me. Since my Mum died I've become an eating monster. Grief certainly hadnt hit me in the no appitate way! I'm disgusted with myself. I've put on double the weight I lost not drinking DP got me an exercise bike and a rower machine from a job but I can't use them thanks to my fractured elbow. Two steps forward one back right now.
Congratulations on your DD driving test mouse I've had to cancel my lessons thanks to my elbow for now. 2nd resolution this year is to pass mine!
sweet I'm still addicted to my rose lemonade. Have you tried that? It's amazing with crushed ice and a sprig of mint.
Venus Why a wonderful thing to do though for the guide dogs. toffs hat and raises mug of tea to you
And waves at everyone else I've forgotten to mention.
Spring is coming, slowly. Let's hope 2019 is kind to us all.

Beaches Hi, and look after yourself. The weight will come off when you are ready. Staying AF after a major bereavement is huge. Looks like a beautiful place where you live too.

Waves to all the babes. Off for a walk this afternoon and hoping the weather holds.