Post here if you love your partner!

[Rigamorph]

...and if you wish, say why.
Just to balance the books against all the depressing relationship threads!

My DP is the love of my life, adores me and our 6m baby, makes me endless cups of tea, and forgave my dog when he chewed the DP's wallet on our 3rd date. For starters! (The list goes on).

My DP is sweet and caring. Thinks I’m wonderful and absolutely brings out the best in me. He’s kind, hugely clever though self deprecating and there’s nothing lovelier than seeing my kids happy with him.

I have this board to thank for getting me out of a violent, abusive relationship and for helping me to learn self respect and boundaries.

It's actually quite refreshing to see a positive thread about relationships. I'm recently separated and usually threads on here make me think men are shit in general.
It's nice to see there are good ones out there.

I love my dh. We will have been married for 20 years next May. We have been together 27 years.
Two children (19 and 15).
Usual ups and downs but we have always been able to talk things through and sort things out.
But I love him. And he loves me. And I could not imagine my life without him.
He's simply lovely :)

After two severely abusive relationships I finally found love with a man that I dated for 3 years in my late teens/early twenties. We moved in together last year, and got married last month after 21 years of being apart due to work. We work because we can just be ourselves with each other.

My grandmother is a widow, she still talks about my late grandfather with love and affection, he was definitely the love of her life. Depends whether you believe it is possible to still love someone after they are gone, I guess. (I do).

Equally I don't believe all love has to be eternal to be 'real'. What's wrong with enjoying the moment?!

As to whether I believe in 'the one' I believe that people become that way over time if conditions are right. I will use a tree analogy if you will bear with me!

The twin trunks of a twisted bay tree wind around each other perfectly as a result of careful years of training, but each has space from each other and will remain standing if the other is cut down, but always keeping the memory (shape) of the partnership.

Other relationships are like divergent trunks - they grow steadily away from each other over time, and loss of one barely affects the other.

A third type of relationship would be like the ivy that grows up a large tree - it clings and has no strength of its own and will fall to the ground without the other partner, yet the tree is barely affected by the ivy.

In another type of relationship (co-dependent?) you could imagine two strands of ivy winding round each other - together they have a certain degree of strength but both parties are weakened and fall if the relationship fails, and do not keep their original shape/identity.

Sorry for the horticultural babble, hopefully someone will understand what I am trying to say!!

Oh so going back to my original point about whether there is 'one' person out there...

To begin with we are all seedlings, with potential. Many trees grow independently, and that is how they are supposed to be, but if you want to think about partnerships: two bay seedlings will obviously be more compatible than an oak and a bay tree. But if you imagine one trunk of that twisted bay tree left after one has gone....for that remaining trunk there will only ever be one perfect match, due to the way they shaped each other over the years.
For an ivy plant, any strong partner could be perfect!
For an oak tree, no partner is needed.

I know we are not trees (!) but that analogy is how I see human relationships.

Sorry, more babble!!

My husband has looked after me all year emotionally and physically, I've now had my surgery and he is amazing. He's cared for me and never made me feel a nuisance. I'm very lucky and very grateful and treasure being his wife

I really dislike it when people try to ruin feel good threads. It just seems that some posters are more content when they believe that everyone is miserable in their marriages or relationships
There are some people who have great relationships. I want to hear about them

I love my DH for so many reasons. He's the most upbeat and positive person I've ever met and is like a ray of chatty sunshine in my life. & we're so very similar in our values and interests - it makes our life together so easy with almost no conflict.

I went on hundreds of first dates to find him, so I know how rare he is & I appreciate him every day.

My H was fab, till he wasn’t quite so fab and did hurtful stuff. Now I am more sanguine and realistic about stuff. However I do still love to see that others after many years are still fine and dandy, I think the secret seems to be that most who seem fine have partnered with calm , cheerful even tempered blokes. Far too many women on here who let their own current shit show seem to almost wish nasty karma on others, sometimes it can feel a bit like get the knitting out by the guillotine. !!

Helped me escape the worst period of my life in a very abusive relationship, is the most kind and supportive person I have ever met! I feel incredibly lucky every single day of my life.

I haven't got a shit show, I'm very happy. The OP said 'post here if you love your partner', so I did.

Freedom of expression, and all that.

I still think her OP was somewhat insensitive in her remark about 'depressing' relationship threads. It must be bloody depressing, yes, for the women stuck in those relationships, seeking help.

It could have been a lovely feel-good OP without that bit. Which is basically what quite a few other posters have said.

And of course I'm glad lots of women are happy. Very glad, actually.

ErickBroch DP and I both had pretty grim divorces and helped to pick each other up. You never forget stuff like that.

There seem to be threads like this pop up periodically.
I think everybody here is aware that there are good relationships and good DHs. Do we really need evidence?
I just wonder A. About the genuine motives for posting a thread like this. Surely, it is rubbing salt into the wounds for those who are suffering (as per title talking about depressing relationship theads).
And B. I suspect most on these so called depressing relationship threads would have described their DH in similar glowing terms to what we see on here at some point.
I honestly think people post on threads like this to gloat - and nothing more.

croprotationinthe13thcentury

I honestly think people post on threads like this to gloat - and nothing more.

Other reasons for posting would include:

• to see what qualities other people value in relationships
• to assess what you see as valuable in your own relationships
• to evaluate whether your relationship is healthy/can be improved, and to allow others to do the same.
• to pass time reading and joining in on a nice conversation

I don't think it's only for gloating.

Clumsy choice of words, maybe, in the OP.

What would be waaaay more interesting would be a post called ‘people who thought their DH was perfect and The One but he turned out to be a twat.’ Now that would be worth a read and I am sure a many great MN readers would have some empathy with it.

Isn't it a sad world where you can't have a thread which shows healthy loving relationships because it isn't as interesting or as good a read to people such as croprotationinthe13thcentury

@croprotationinthe13thcentury that made me laugh! I am one of those currently stuck with a twatty one!

So what if someone wants to talk about great their Dp is. This isn't only for bad relationships or advice on bad relationships.

It's about relationships. And sometime it's good for some people to think about the nice things their OH does.

Talking about something happy isn't a bad thing.

croprotationinthe13thcentury it would be good. I could post on there too. That still doesn't mean this thread shouldn't be here. If you don't find it interesting, don't open it and/or don't post.

I love reading about things that make people happy. I get happy from other people being happy.

This thread makes me laugh. I have however had inspiration and am off to post a thread entitled “Anyone on here who is such a freaking great parent, has awesome and perfect children and never has to worry about anything?” Just to make up for all the posts where people are asking for advice and opinions to get them through this parenthood thing.

@Newerversion I'm an average parent(scale tipping lower than higher), I'm a ridiculous worrier but my kid is pretty awesome. what do i get?

Rebel two out of three ain’t bad

Newerversion I think it would be lovely to start a thread asking people about all the parts of parenting they truly enjoy/love.

People are such joy sponges on here honestly. What is the problem with a nice thread about healthy relationships? Plenty of people going through shit times have said it gives them hope etc... Me included when I was there.

You don't have to be negative about absolutely everything in life. Lighten up and be happy for other people! So much bitterness on this thread it's sad to see.