Walked in with an erection

[mollymoomalone]

So my partner has a 3 year old with his ex, however he has only managed to ejaculate once in 18 months in bed with me. Albeit he is on heavy medication due to health problems he manages to ejaculate every day through self masterbation. Not really interested in sex just in me pleasuring him for hours to no good end 😢

Yesterday his ex visited , he was in the kitchen cooking and she went in there only for a minute and returned to the conservatory. A minute later he walked into the conservatory and put a cup on n the tab,le before immediately returning to the kitchen. I was gobsmacked to notice he had a definite erection sticking straight out in his shorts, I fo,lowed hi. The the kitchen and grabbed the said erection to prove my eyes weren’t deceiving me .

He says I’m being silly and he hadn’t even noticed ...it’s just because he had no pants on only loose football shorts

Not having a penis myself , I want to know is it possible that someone could not know that they had a semi erection when walking form one room to another ?... am I over reacting ?..

The grabbing of the erect penis has has me laughing.

I remember seeing a guy in a the pool area on holiday years back.

He had an erection. I'm not sure if he knew or not, but the lifeguard went to him and asked him to leave the area due to his erection as children were there.

It was quite funny at the time.

He was

Does he pleasure you sexually OP?

@Sisterlove that is vey funny.

poor lifeguard, probably doesn't get paid enough for such tasks.

Oh please LTB.

22 years difference? As in 40-18?

Yes, your partner needs to leave you.

How dare you "grab" his erection without permission. This is abuse. And I am appalled that there have been very little comments relating to this point.

If this was a man OP, mumsnet would be in uproar.

@CauliflowerBalti This isn't a marriage. They've only been together a relatively short time.

@26mcjrfm Oh get a grip! (So to speak.) This poor woman spends every afternoon pleasuring this fella, who gives nothing in return except an erection when he sees an old flame.

How old are the three of you?

@HollowTalk she isn't forced to pleasure him (from what I've read). But she forced herself on him. It's sexual assault no matter how you put it.

Ok they don't sound sexually compatible, but there is no excuse for this. If my partner grabbed my genitalia to see if I was aroused without permission, he wouldn't darken my doorway again.

Few thoughts

1. Death grip

1. Medication

1. Yes don't grab him!

If he wanks a lot it's normal to struggle to climax without that. He will need to make a concerted effort to decrease stimulation so that he can learn to finish with less
...grip?

Could be medication. DP struggled on SSRIs. But we could still have good sex, just had to do the end bit manually sometimes. Have you discussed the issue? Makes sense for him to check the common side effects of his meds and see if it may be contributing

Men get random erections but he would notice.

I wouldn't mind someone (well, a partner!) groping me in either a humorous or nice way privately. But I am assuming that it was hostile and aggressive. Pretty demeaning. Have to agree with others who have pointed out how wrong that was.

I should point out , I probably overstated the grabbing of the said erection. I walked into the kitchen and asked whats going on “,,,,,,,,,,,,” what’s that, he said “ what’s what “ and which point I held his still semi erect penis in my hand 🤚 and said this. He calmly said what, what do you mean, I said you have a boner, you’ve just walked into the room behind your ex with a boner sticking out in full view. He denied it and played it down , said he never noticed and it was only as he wasn’t wearing pants. There was nobody else in the room at the time. I hope this clarifies things for all of you concerned for his welfare. Rest Ssured I shan’t be putting it in my hand again

I’m 56, he is 54, she is 32

Have you two tried relationship counsiling? What is he wanking about? Is he watching porn?

Oh. I frequently grab DH's erection and never had any complaints, he's normally pretty pleased with himself 😁 ....but not in the kitchen - hygiene and health & safety etc. TBH OP it sounds very very dodge with his ex and all that. I think his still fixated on her.

I wouldn't mind someone (well, a partner!) groping me in either a humorous or nice way privately. But I am assuming that it was hostile and aggressive. Pretty demeaning. Have to agree with others who have pointed out how wrong that was.

To be fair, if I presented a very obvious erection to another woman I'd be bloody grateful for just an aggressive grope from my wife. I'd more likely expect her to whack it full force with a heavy object and I can't say I'd blame her.

OP - your last post does sound like a chapter of 50 Shades sans the sizzle.

I hope this clarifies things for all of you concerned for his welfar

Nice OP. You shouldn't have grabbed his penis like that. It was wrong and I trust you'd find it bloody offensive if someone did something similar to you.

I'm out.

Time to say bye bye I’d think

He'd probably have more erections if he wasn't in the kitchen doing the cooking.

I don't think its fair to jump to porn use. I think its perfectly possible for men to struggle to ejaculate due to their individual anatomy just as some women struggle to orgasm also. Some people don't do it at all.

I don't see why that means either men or women who don't orgasm during sex should be chucked on the scrap heap as unsuitable partners.