Dating Thread 135 - Will Harry Ever Meet Sally?

[Kinunir]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

so I'm thinking of trying Bumble first this time. I find it very hard to do more than one site at a time. I'm going to swerve guardian soulmates, even though I had a lot of success on there, as I think xp will go back there and I'd rather avoid that for a bit.

I'm also in the camp of looking for a relationship. Can't see the point of anything else!

Margo I have had a quick look and can't see how to do it - there is a number on the help section to ring. I have the app and have it on my laptop as well - it's easy to do there!

Kin Sorry the date didn't got better.

Val Sounds promising. Online dating feels very much like buses. You wait for ages for a decent guy and then several come a long at once.

Jax I hope Thursday goes well.

Daffo I struggle with more than one site at a time. So for now I am sticking to Tinder. As it's the one I have the most success with. I downloaded Bumble and had a bit of a play with it and if I get bored of Tinder will give it more of a go.

I am not fully decided whether I am looking for a relationship lite situation or a fully fledged relationship. It has just been me and my DS for 6 years so I struggle imagining the dynamic of adding a guy to the situation. But if I meet the right person who knows.

As of last night night I now have a date arranged this evening with Mr Finance been speaking to him on and off for almost 2 weeks and he asked to meet me for after work drinks this evening and I though why not.

Also date tomorrow with Mr Red who is refreshingly keen (in a nice way).

Mr Grammar hasn't been heard from since Wednesday so that pretty much means Saturday evening isn't going ahead. I was last to message so I ain't chasing.

margo i think you might have to do this:

“On your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch:

Go to Settings > iTunes & App Store.
Tap your Apple ID at the top of the screen.
Tap View Apple ID. You might need to sign in or use Touch ID.

Tap Subscriptions.
Tap the subscription that you want to manage. ...
Use the options to manage your subscription.”

i’ve had to do that for other apps that autocharge, like MyFitnessPal, not sure if its the same for dating apps?

esk1mo - thank you!!! I've done it now - perfect instructions.

vista - good luck with your two dates this weekend.

crikey bumble is odd. I'm not used to messaging first!

Daff I like the way Bumble works but I have to say that, although I got quite a few matches, only 3 messaged back with 24 hours. Of those I've had 1 date so not a great success for me.

yes the time limit worries me! Do they all just disappear after 24 hours?! I'm not very good at timescale stuff - I'm likely to not remember to look every day and I guess the next day they are gone!

I have messaged 3 people. Does it even show you if they read them?

daffo yes, once you match you have 24 hours to message. I've had one date from there. Then he ghosted me! I find messages seem to tail off, but that might just be me not making the effort.

A friend of mine is newly single and wanted to try Tinder. Somehow she persuaded me to have another go with her. She's 10 years younger than me but we have some overlap in age range, so thought it would be fun to see if got any matches the same.
In 3 days, I got 1 match - turned out he was just on holiday here.
In 24 hours, she got 20 matches, is messaging 5 and has dates lined up with another 2.

I've got good photos (tested using Photofeeler,com and friends' opinions), a short but hopefully interesting write up. I have no idea what I'm doing wrong. I had the same last time I tried any of the sites - complete lack of interest from anyone. Wish I'd never gone along with her idea now.

I'm on Tinder and Bumble, I find Tinder better overall as I forget to message people. Plus I have a sneaking feeling that loads of the Bumble profiles are fake, they all look a bit too good to be true?!

My date from the other evening, lets call him Mr Chatty is still chatting away but no date suggested and its like chatting to a friend...I'm not sure I want to suggest date 2 really as on the fence re chemistry, so I'm slowing down responses and lets see.

yes I thought that too cool about the profiles but I have avoided the ones that look obviously too good to be true lol

The quality on Bumble seems much higher than on the others - they don't disappear after 24 hours but you can't message them again - unless you pay to extend and I've not bothered with that.

Ticket got for Queen on Sunday - my first gig flying solo - will be interesting to see who I'm sitting next to - would be so nice to meet someone in RL and ditch this madness.

yes it would be good wouldn't it Val

I am going on holiday on my own AGAIN this summer for around the 7th summer in a row, sigh!

Daff I'm mainly forward to it but a little bit unsure - I'll chat to anyone so hopefully will meet some like minded people!

runs were you just swiping on who you really fancied? i know alot of people will swipe on everyone, then wittle down their matches.

you can also pay ~£4 to get tinder plus, or ~£8 for tinder gold, and see who has already liked you. that way you can go check out their profile, and if you like the look of them you can swipe & it’ll be an instant match!

esk1mo - I swiped right on just about everyone, except the ones that were obviously just looking for sex. I tried the same thing a couple of months ago. Same result - nothing.

I thought about paying - it cost £35.99 for one month - but I don't see how that it will help me. It will show me who has liked me but they will be outside my distance settings otherwise I would see them anyway.
I got a free trial on Bumble awhile ago, lots of likes but I rejected them all because they were miles away.

runs, bumble does a weird thing where it shows your location where you are at the exact point you are online. So some bloke messaged me back and it looked like he was far away but he wasn't because he just happened to be visiting there for work!

But i totally get not wanting to even start a messaging thing with someone miles away.

the bumble thing is odd - I've messaged 3 people who matched me or whatever it is. 1 has disappeared (I'm guessing he decided he didn't want to match after all, not sure how he did that, I need to learn how to do it - I guess it's a deleting thing!), 1 has just said thanks for the message (fgs!) and then the other replied. It is an odd thing!

also I think (like the other sites I've been on) there are a VAST amount of men lying about their age. I really really wish they wouldn't!

This OLD really takes a lot of effort and energy..am I the only one who forgets what I've said to who? Just hope they like ditzy " I love Lucy" types.. I'm sorting a potential date for next week.His pic I think shows him in a Kabul and shades so I'm keeping an open mind.

kagoul not Kabul.. Afghanistan would be a he'll of a commute..

@Runs, yeah I debated Tinder Gold but it's really expensive. And I never last a whole month consistently on Tinder!
And I'm not sure it's worth it?

cool i read somewhere the price depends on where you live, is that true? i live in a big city (in Scotland) and its £8.99 per month, but runs just said its £35 for a month!

i think i remember pudding saying tinder plus/gold was also a different price (allbeit in euro)

ok, after a quick google i have discovered that its cheaper if you are female and cheaper if you are under 28

how is that allowed?!

I've googled and esk1mo is right - Tinder is a lot more expensive if you are over 28. And somehow they are able to get away with it.

Tinder plus gives you unlimited swipes, swiping anywhere in the world, one boost a month, 5 super-swipes and the ability to rewind your swipe.
Tinder gold is the same but you can see who's liked you as well.

The general consensus seems to be that it's not worth paying for unless you like setting up dates with people outside your usual area. The other features like boosts & super-swipes shouldn't be necessary if you've a got profile and are not going to help you if no one likes your profile anyway.

I'm just going to resign myself to being single forever.
Good luck to those with dates this weekend.