Dating Thread 135 - Will Harry Ever Meet Sally?

[Kinunir]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

ok i lasted 10 mins on Badoo, it is literally the dregs of where I live. hmph

Can't say that I'm impressed with it now I've used it esk1mo

im having a look at Match now, whats Affinity?

Christ. This isn't looking good is it?!

i think im going to make a pamphlet or dating CV. i will hand it out to potential suitors i see in public. i’ll include about me, relevant contact info and a picture gallery, much like online dating. except it will be done in public, to people ive seen with my own eyes and therefore know i fancy

For those of you trying new sites, this is my top Bumble tip. I joined there again weeks ago. There was initial interest and chats then nothing. I was offered a free trial. So I did that. Somehow I ended up paying for a month in error. I've cancelled that but didn't bother with the app for a while. I went back a couple of days ago and must have had at least 30 people want to match with me. Most of them were unsuitable but I had a pleasant evening checking each profile and I have got a handful of new conversations on the go.

Two dates this week. Both irons for a while. Coffee (1st date)with Mr Scandi tomorrow and dinner (4th date) with Mr Academic on Friday.

It's a weird time for me Literary - best response rates I've ever had but not even a sniff of a date. Is anyone in a similar situation or is it just me?

How about walking round town in a billboard esk1mo? Instead of "the end of the world is nigh" yours could have a message saying "awesome woman needs coffee/dinner/something else"?

Sounds promising Tom and good to hear someone has actually got a date from Bumble!

Advice needed please! So as well as my two dates, I've been chatting again to someone who was almost an iron. We got on well but never met up. There was once some miscommunication and we stopped chatting. Anyway, he found me on Instagram a while ago and we've been talking again. The conversation became....er....interesting last week . And it was all good fun. Anyway, I've been doing some social media checking and can see that he is actually back with the woman he dated last year. When we met on OLD earlier this year he referred to her as a "psycho".
Needless to say I am really cross about this. I don't mind the chat at all, it was a lot of fun, but I do mind that he is seeing someone. If I'd known that I'd never have gone there. My question is, would you say anything? They're away right now, but I do suspect he'll be back for more.

Kin I have had loads of messages since my new profile, I have a date this morning with Mr Campervan and have been asked out on several other dates (one I am ghoasting as he lives too far away and I can’t be bothered), I possibly have another date Thursday and 2 others waiting for me to secure a date. I’m running out of time to fit them in this week . Maybe be a bit more forward and ask people out for a coffeee? I have had a few men suggest coffee after exchanging one or 2 messages.

So, I’m off out with Mr Campervan, it’s hot out already, we are going for coffee and a walk, what do wear? I live in shorts, am I ok to wear shorts? But I don’t have many comfortable shoes to wear with them, I can’t wear trainers but if we are walking I can’t wear sandals? I’m getting nervous, I can’t do anything with my hair which seemed to get bleached in the sun yesterday and has almost turned white ☹️🙄

Tom I have one of those types of irons although he is a very old childhood friend. Occasionally he will message me on messenger and there’s a lot of sex talk, he also sends me random photos of himself. I know he has a girlfriend as he posts about her on Fb. So last week when he messaged me I pointed out that he has a girlfriend, this didn’t seem to bother him and he indicated that she was bi and asked if I would consider joining them I haven’t spoken to him since. Some people do have open relationships but I think it’s best to stay away from anyone who isn’t 100% single.

Hmmmm, I normally give it about 10 messages before suggesting coffee at which point the answer is no far more often than I have experienced previously. If I ask after one or two messages I tend to get blocked or told I'm obviously only after one thing.

Good to hear your profile is working so well though - it was a genius idea!

Kin personally I do like to chat for a few days then hope to arrange coffee. Any longer than that and I lose interest. If there seems to be a real connection then I am happy if the date arranging/number swapping happens much sooner. It sounds to me like you just haven't met the right person yet. But you will. It can just take some time. And huge amounts of patience!

Love good luck with the date today. Why can't you wear sandals? That's what I'd go for instead of trainers. It's annoying isn't it, the whole sex chat thing when they actually have a partner? I was cheated on by exH so I just won't go there. Even online, it's still cheating in my book. I always felt this one, think I called him Mr Camera, was my "one that got away". We seem to get on so well. But if he's prepared to send me dick pics when he has a partner then he's actually not worth knowing. He's now my "lucky escape"!

Tom you're lucky you swerved him - he badmouths his ex, then he gets back together with her and then he gets off on dirty chat and sending dick photos to other women while still with her. You're probably not the only one he's doing that with. What a prince amongst men..!

Vet my sentiments exactly. If he was single then it might be different. I think he's an utter cock. Any suggestions for a response when he comes begging for more will be gratefully received.

so much going on, as ever!

Love good luck with the date. I think you should wear the shoes that you will be comfortable in and then you'll be relaxed and not thinking about your shoes!

I think my date tonight has ghosted me. We chatted on the phone on Saturday morning and he suggested a date this evening. We exchanged a few texts after that & then late on Sunday afternoon I sent him two different options for the date & it's been howling silence ever since. That's a fun first for me.

Tom as Vet says, I think you swerved a bad one there. Well done for checking him out behind the scenes.

Tom at most I would tell him to fuck off but really I would probably just block him. I wouldn't waste my time explaining why or getting into a debate with him, he's just a common or garden arsehole and not worth the effort.

I've backed away from Hotafricanguy this week. Decided to listen to my instincts which were telling me he was a controller. It all got so intense in two weeks via texting and we just didn't get each other's humour either. I also think he wanted a GF not the FWB I'm looking for. He told me at one point that I would have to let the other guys go when we got serious, and I said ahem I don't think so and nobody tells me what to do! Didn't go down too well. Anyway, that's my date nights this week blown out now. I've offered one evening to dreamytraindriver but he hasn't replied yet.

As a parent, it's such a faff organising babysitters that if plans fall through its extra annoying, and I don't want to waste any opportunities for me time that I've managed to create. Lots of single blokes without kids just don't realise what a premium my time is.
For example, I have Hotyounggardener who is a serial milfer and wants to meet up. He blew me out last week and then grovelled. I haven't heard from him since the weekend but I bet he will contact me as soon as he fancies a bit, and then I won't be free! Spontaneity is almost impossible.

So, I need to post on the OLD apps: I'm free tonight and have a babysitter in place. Any takers??? hahahaha

Kin I'm finding that now I have been OLD for a while that I would arrange to meet sooner rather than later. Less effort, time and energy expended that way.

Love Good luck for the date today.

I Told a guy I was chatting to this morning that basically it was a no from me (put in a very nice way) and I have received a rant back in response. I can sort of see why people ghost now.

I've just had an unsolicited "you're ugly" message - I really wish I knew what had changed since I was last doing OLD a few months ago, it's gone from extremely difficult to impossible now

Oh kin just tell them to fuck off and then report and block them.

Yeah, I've already done that. It's pissed me off though - once in a while and I put it down to trolls but that's three in two days now and if I have one pervasive insecurity it's the fact that I know I'm well below average in the looks department

Bendy sounds like you need a more Hookup-ish website like FabSwingers

You'd have NO problem with what you're looking for on there. You can chat to them and send photos just the same to check if you like someone but it's more open what everyone is after.
You certainly don't need to be interested in swinging

Kin I'm another one who helped with your profile back there last time you were OLD and you certainly don't fall into my 'ugly' category!!

You've got to 'rise above it' these small minded people probably spam 100's of these messages.

kin do you think it's worth getting some professional photos done? It might be a big confidence boost for you and you'll know you are presenting yourself in the best way possible. I know a photographer who does amazing headshots for £150 all in. I'm going to use him for my work related ones I need to get done. He is in London, not sure where you are.

Thanks for the idea Bendy but I already have pro photos - when the good people on this thread reviewed my profile a few months back I was advised not to use them (but I still have one on my profile!)