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Original poster

Dating Thread 135 - Will Harry Ever Meet Sally?

999 replies

Kinunir · 21/06/2018 10:16

Dating thread rules:

  1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
  2. Develop a thick skin.
  3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
  4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
  5. Trust your gut instinct.
  6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
  7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
  8. If it's not fun, stop.
  9. Loo update is mandatory.
10. No dating the thread

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
MinnieMul7 · 25/06/2018 11:40

Just catching up again after a busy weekend.

Kin I had one guy pick me up from the house, I didn't even think about the risks until after. We had been speaking for a few weeks and I stalked his social media and his families so I guess I had a gut feeling it would be ok.

Vixen I agree with Hatty that a third date with each may give you an answer but just enjoy both and see what happens. I am sure these things have a way with working themselves out.

I feel like I am being ignored a bit this morning. I usually get a morning text. I havent today. I then text as I had something to ask, no reply. It is not unusual the time in replying as generally he isn't quick but I would have thought I would have had a reply by now. He has been on social media this morning too Confused. Trying to ignore my phone and get on with some work but it is hard.

Lovemusic33 · 25/06/2018 11:50

Vixen I agree that you should go on date 3 and then maybe thing about choosing (or maybe not). I maybe in a similar situation after this week but I doubt it very much, I have a couple dates but not getting my hopes up with any of them.

Just had a message on POF, saying ‘love your profile, looks like we have lots in common, what are you doing at the weekend, maybe if your near (miles away from where I live) we could meet up?’, so I look at his profile which is about 5 billion words telling his life story and how he loves watching tv and box sets and going out on the piss (nothing in common with me at all). What a weirdo, I can’t see anything we have in common, if anything he is my complete opposite.

Lovemusic33 · 25/06/2018 11:52

Val Mr musics run down on his cholesterol sounds annoying, I like to eat what ever I like so someone telling me not to eat meat would probably end with me telling them to f&*k off.

Original poster
Kinunir · 25/06/2018 12:10

hatty dating a geek in London... wonder if I know him? Hmm

I don't think letting a man know where you are/pick you up/drop you off so early is necessarily as dangerous as the media portrays Minnie but when it goes bad, it can be really bad. I've only ever often a first date a lift when it's been obvious that she'd be walking home in the dark but even I think that's still dodgy and I'm (almost) a saint!

That sounds like a very lazy copy and paste message Love. Ignorance is bliss in such cases.

OP posts:
Original poster
Kinunir · 25/06/2018 12:11

offered, not often - too much sunshine wine already today Blush

OP posts:
A4710Rider · 25/06/2018 12:17

Couldn't summon up the will to go on POF this weekend.

Vistaverde · 25/06/2018 13:12

This has been a busy thread over the week.

Val That sounds promising. I often find that when expectations are lower dates are better.

200 I don't think I would message him unless he has a very good excuse.

Love Sounds like you're in for a busy and interesting week. I have been chatting this week, to three guys who have very similar names and it has got a bit confusing at times. Two are now on Whatsapp which I find easier.

I have two new irons.

Mr Red - Walking date arranged for Saturday morning. He asked for a phone call and we ended up speaking to each other for about an hour last night so if nothing else we should have plenty to talk about.

Mr Grammar - We have bonded over a mutual liking of correct grammar and spelling Grin. Date tentatively arranged for Saturday evening but I didn't hear from him at all yesterday so I'm not going to hold my breath.

Mr Whatsapp - Guy who I seem to have been talking on Whatsapp for ever is still showing no sign of wanting to go on an actual date but I do quite like talking to him. So still undecided as to what to do about him.

Also, a question. I am talking to another guy on Tinder who I shall call Mr Security and whilst I am enjoying the chat and find him very good looking I can't see anything long term happening. How do I broach meeting up for a bit of fun?

marriednotdead · 25/06/2018 13:16

Found you Smile

POF boring me now, same old faces and bullshit. Had a few messages with a guy who disappeared after 2 pleasant phone calls that seemed pretty keen on his part. Pass, I cba to ask.
Meanwhile had a spontaneous second 'date' with Mr Tennis having already confirmed a later one iyswim. He mentioned he was going to a car boot fair and I tagged along. He's very easy company and there's definitely a bit of a spark although he's not as tall as I'd like. Not sure exactly what he's looking for, suspect we may need to have a talk soon as I am not looking for a FWB situation. The one I've already got would step aside if I met a serious suitor but he's made it clear in his own way that he's not willing to be simply substituted and tbh, the sex is too good to disagree. I suspect he's upped his game even further since he's known I'm OLD, he's not making it easy Grin

coolcahuna · 25/06/2018 14:07

I've just the ' no spark' text from my date on Saturday. Fair enough, he was very nice about it. Strange date though as we had lunch and then he suggested we go to the next town for a mooch and coffee, which is a bit odd for someone not feeling it.

It was quite a nice date, he was nice looking and clearly a nice person but there was no banter really - more like a good chat.

Back to the drawing board :-)

coolcahuna · 25/06/2018 14:07

I've just the ' no spark' text from my date on Saturday. Fair enough, he was very nice about it. Strange date though as we had lunch and then he suggested we go to the next town for a mooch and coffee, which is a bit odd for someone not feeling it.

It was quite a nice date, he was nice looking and clearly a nice person but there was no banter really - more like a good chat.

Back to the drawing board :-)

hatty44 · 25/06/2018 14:25

It did take me a while to post @kin in case it was you! But you have more children so I think i’m safe. Mind you I only have good to say about him so I guess it wouldn’t matter too much Wink

LiteraryDevil1 · 25/06/2018 14:29

Would it be bad to join a dating site with not much intention of actually going on a date unless they appeared to be amazing? I enjoy chatting to people but won't carry on pointless conversation by text or the site if there's no sign of meeting up. I don't want to go on lots of dates. I'm looking for quality not quantity. Hope that makes sense.

Original poster
Kinunir · 25/06/2018 14:43

As long as he's not short and bald hatty I can rest easy, knowing it's not my old boss Grin. Glad to hear it's going well.

Literary if you do whatever you want to do then that is the correct answer. I think only dating amazing is what we are all intending to do, even if it doesn't always turn out that way.

OP posts:
Jaxinthebox · 25/06/2018 15:15

kin was your old boss my old husband? Grin

Ive got a date on Friday and Im chatting to a few nice guys - but I cant be arsed with POF at the moment. Im busy with friends and family and work so although Im getting asked out Im being more choosy than normal... which is pretty choosy.

Original poster
Kinunir · 25/06/2018 15:23

Yes Jax he was, I'm talking to him about you now Grin

OP posts:
Carouselfish · 25/06/2018 16:44

I want to ask, what do you say to 'irons' who you are now giving up?
I've had two on the go, Mr Motorbike and Mr Theroux for 3 dates and 2 dates respectively and whilst they're very nice people, I don't desperately want to jump into bed with them, IYKWIM. Then, I went on a first date with someone I wasn't hopeful about, Mr Mafia. Well, we talked for 6 hours in a couple of pubs and I really fancied him. Very rare for me. Really seems to tick all my boxes.
I find it really hard to maintain any enthusiasm for the other two, even though it's only been one date. Texts have been five a day from Mr Mafia and I'm the one who's rubbish about replying, so that's the most I can cope with really, and it's nice. I find I'm checking my phone to see his name.
Too early to ditch the other irons? How do I do it nicely? I know Mr Theroux will be really hurt. one of the reasons I'm less keen on him, he's a bit overly keen

MargoLovebutter · 25/06/2018 16:46

Carousel you can't carry on dating out of pity! Mr Theroux will get over it. Glad you found someone you fancy Grin.

ValMc1 · 25/06/2018 16:50

Carousel I agree pity is not s good reason to see someone best do it sooner rather than later.

BendyLikeBeckham · 25/06/2018 17:09

Has anyone got any good advice about something really silly? It's the transition bit on a first date when it goes from normal to physical. I.e. kissing, touching etc. I'm so rubbish at this and always feel awkward, like we both know it's coming but neither wants to make the first move in case it's wrong timing or whatever. I feel like an inexperienced teenager!
I've actually made the first move twice now, just to end the torture! Both times were responded to very enthusiastically so I know it was wanted. What is wrong with guys? Both dates were with a view to eventually being FWB so it's not as if we both weren't expecting to have a snog.
Anyone who says it all happens naturally is wrong!! for me anyway

Original poster
Kinunir · 25/06/2018 17:14

Bendy I just pay close attention to body language and how the whole interaction is going and, if the answer is well or neutral plus, in for the kill I go. Don't think I've ever been knocked back at that point so I'd say it's all about reading the signs...

OP posts:
ValMc1 · 25/06/2018 17:17

Can I tap in your wealth of experience - I'm on Match - signed up for a £5 for a month basic sub - I've had lots of views and favourites but not one message - am I missing something or is it no-one has the urge to contact me!

Original poster
Kinunir · 25/06/2018 17:48

Bugger! Just went on POF to arrange a coffee date for tomorrow with the only potential iron I had to discover she's deleted her profile. Hey ho, at least I still have a strong emotional effect on people Grin

OP posts:
BendyLikeBeckham · 25/06/2018 18:00

Val just make the first move. there is no point sitting and waiting! you've got nothing to lose.

kinunir in for the kill!!! love it Grin
yeah that's what I did out of sheer proactivity but I'm so awkward at "the signs". They make me want to laugh out of embarrassment or change the subject or something. I need more practice!!!!

Sorry to hear your prospect disappeared. the next one is only round the corner you know!

ValMc1 · 25/06/2018 18:25

I have but no messages - don't have connect so who knows ?

ValMc1 · 25/06/2018 18:26

Kin I'm sure (hope) it's not personal - what did you say to her? Lol