I bloody hate men.

[Horriblegrandma]

After all these years I've come to the conclusion that the vast majority of men are bastards. I have been sexually, emotionally and physically abused, some of these multiple times. I've been cheated on and lied to and taken advantage of so many times.

All men think about is sex. I just don't want to know. They are all obsessed with it like it's the only thing that matters in life. I see women objectified all the time and used by men.

I am so sick of it all and don't think I could ever trust another man as long as I live.

I know I'm probably being over the top and that some of you have got lovely husbands but my own experiences are so far away from that. I don't want to feel like this but I'm so done with it all. I have a partner but he has also let me down recently.

Good guys are out there, but I don’t believe they’re the majority sadly
Sadly, I completely agree!

Interesting thread, and to read about the abuse.

I probably have had more difficulties with women actually, but mainly because I don't know many men in real life and nearly all my worst dealings have been with women ( at work, in the family, in the nursery etc). Men usually keep to themselves and their family/work so unless you are related to them or work with them you don't really have dealings with that many of them.

I think personally I had a lot to offer the right man, so I do judge wonder about men negatively for not choosing me, but then OTOH maybe I was happier single, or no man was good enough for me. The more permanent relationships I had (for a year or two) weren't great, so I could honestly say I never met any of these great, good men; I just don't think there are enough to go around. So if you don't meet one, its better to be single. Much better.

This whole relationship malarkey is nonsense. I am married but if I had my time over, I would just plough through life independently. No point putting any of them on pedestals. No point at all. I hate some of the fuss and nonsense that a lot of women do to attract and keep a man

^agree with TimeforTea

Though its also heartening to read Shirley's positive thoughts re. the fantastic ones out there.

Though I agree with alot of what MistressDee says (are things getting worse its quite worrying), I can't agree with her conclusion that one will arrive if you are psychologically ready. Firstly there are varying circumstances working against many women (e.g. single parent, poverty or over 30 lets be honest). And more generally, I think its a bit of a myth (and a lottery)

I think the shark cage metaphor is really useful for thinking about boundaries:
www.psychotherapy.com.au/fileadmin/site_files/pdfs/SharkCage.pdf

Ohyesiam - are you me?!

Wow a lot of man hating bile on this thread. Plenty of horrible women out there as well fyi.

Yes there are femidom and unfortunately I was befriended by a very toxic female whilst I was going through my break up. I have since cut ties and I am down to only two friends who I trust. It’s made me learn my boundaries were very fragile so before I even contemplate new relationships or friendships I am taking care of me.

femidom let’s cut the shit with pretending women are just as bad huh? Men have a long history that proves you would be wrong to do so.

With the online dating apps, men think they'e at an all you can eat brothel

This is so true!

It’s taken me until my late 40s but i’ve given up now. I wouldn’t even say i’m bitter, more sadly resigned to the fact that at my age pickings are slim to begin with and virtually every single guy in my age group that is single, is single for a reason or looking for someone at least 10 years younger. And I don’t want to go way younger or older (not that I think it would make a difference anyway).

But i’ve Made a certain peace with it now and, in a way, I feel a sense of freedom that I don’t have to invest any time or emotional energy on someone else. I just have to take care of me and tbh, I treat myself better than most men would!

Sorry AngelsSins I don't agree.
There are a large number of horrible men out there.
There are also a large number of horrible women out there.
And if my opinion doesn't cut the mustard with you, then we must agree to disagree.

Charming...

I don't just look at Mumsnet forums, I also look (and contribute) to forums mostly used by men.Every now and then you'll get someone who posts sexist crap like this Bloody women are all the same etc..

The big difference is that the posters get called out on it. You don't get 60+ posters piling in to agree with it. Would you all be happy with the following??

"I bloody hate muslims"
"I bloody hate blacks"
"I bloody hate gays"

Followed by a stream of anecdotes about their own personal life which somehow allows them to apply their prejudice to millions of individuals they have never met

I think not.

If everywhere you go smells of shit, check your shoes.

What does that mean Disquieted1?

Sorry AngelsSins I don't agree.
There are a large number of horrible men out there.
There are also a large number of horrible women out there.
And if my opinion doesn't cut the mustard with you, then we must agree to disagree.

Ok, care to point out all the ways that women have oppressed men and taken away their rights? You know, things like the vote, ability to have a bank account or own property, rights over their own bodies such as marital rape, not allowing them to hold a patent, stolen their achievements, not allowing them to work, or judged them on their sex lives and withheld contraception etc? Or ways in which women have historically made rules that exclude men, such as who can be religious leaders or directors of companies or MPs?

Or maybe you can name the many wars women have started? Or the number of female serial killers, or just murderers compared to men? How many women rape men? How many men are murdered each week by women?

Maybe you can name a school where we learn all about female history and hardly mention male achievements?

Maybe you can give examples of women exploiting men, maybe by paying poor or trafficked men for sex, or to perform online because women getting off is more important than a mans welfare?

Maybe you can tell me how much women owe in unpaid child support out of the 3.8 billion currently owed? Or how many women walk out on their kids and never look back?

Maybe you can explain where women hold men to double standards? For example, don’t be stupid and wear a short skirt\get drunk\walk home alone because it’s your fault if your raped, but also don’t suspect men you man hater?

Maybe you can point out where women are unsupportive of men because I see women supporting men in sport, comedy, film etc, but see men putting women down in the reverse situation.

No, women are not angels, but they don’t even come close to men. You can’t claim women are just as bad and offer no proof to back up that claim.

2boysDad no need to take it so personally. Men are not an oppressed minority like the other examples you’ve given, they have held all the power throughout history. Sorry if you can’t see the difference.

I'd say it means seek the common denominator Mrsmadevans.

"they have held all the power throughout history. Sorry if you can’t see the difference."

Even if that was true, I don't care. It's irrelevant.

I haven't held any power. I just turn up to work, get paid, look after my kids and try to behave like a decent human being. Sometimes I even look at Mumsnet, mostly for the amusing "stuff that has happened at weddings" threads.

I don't appreciate being told how much I'm hated and how much I deserve to be hated because of what other people may or may not have done. I'm an individual. Don't lump me in with a group due to my skin-colour/religion/gender/sexuality/nationality/any other nonsense.

My sympathies to the OP - you clearly haven't had much luck with the men in your life. Apologies if you feel I've hijacked your thread, that wasn't my intention.

I hear you

Sounds harsh to hate so many of them but I really do

Single free and so happy

Personally just not meant to be in a relationship
They have all damaged me - physically, emotionally and mentally

Even if that was true, I don't care. It's irrelevant

Irrelevant? So women’s history, women’s lived experiences are all irrelevant because you're a nice guy (even though you don’t seem to have any empathy)? Is that what you’re saying? Women should shut up about the evils men have committed because it makes nice guys like you feel bad? Try listening rather than getting so defensive.

Black people were oppressed purely down to the colour of their skin. Women feel disillusioned with men, or angry with men for very real reasons.

Brilliantly put @AngelsSins
I agree with every word.

Thanks hungryhippie I fear I’ve gone into rant mode

AngelsSins Couldn't agree more with every word you posted .

Totally agree with the OP, the majority of men are complete bellends

With the online dating apps, men think they'e at an all you can eat brothel

I've just had an example of what I consider rudeness/entitlement from OLD. I agreed to meet a guy for coffee in our city centre on Saturday - he said "meet me at 1:30pm, I would like to photograph an acquiantance as she goes to be married at 2pm" (in the city centre registry office).

I feel I'm worth more than a half hour window at the busiest time and day for coffee shops! find table, queue, glug coffee, goodbye..... no thanks!

When I was separating from my ExH 3 of his friends tried it on with me. All good friends, all married. It seemed that from the moment of separation I was seen as fair game. Especially it seemed as it wasn’t amicable and I was quite going though a meltdown vulnerable
The worst of that is I’m sure if I’d have accepted all these kind offers then I would have been called a slag’....
So I get where you’re coming from OP. Even in the late 90’s working in a call centre it was observed that all 4 male managers had at some point had affairs with one of the younger girls on the team.
I do however think that a lot of women excuse bad male behaviour though, which does help matters (‘she threw herself at him, what was he supposed to do?’ I’ve heard from one wife)