Would you date a man...

[PrettyLittIeThing]

That doesn't work? (Just wondering.)

Well I'm married to a man who doesn't work but that's different as he's bringing up our children.

I would want any man I was involved in to have a bloody good reason for not working eg studying, caring responsibilities.

My friend dated a cocklodger who didn't work, able bodied, no kids and I met him a few times and to be honest I lost respect for him as he was just choosing the lazy options in life.

Like the song says, gotta have a J-O-B, if you wanna be with me! (love that tune!)

Really? Why?

When I say that I mean the tiny subset of people who would rather stubbornly sit and starve to death than stack shelves in a supermarket. I don't want to live in a society that would let people needlessly die when we are so rich and have so much (even though our current government likes to give much of it away to billionaires and very rich companies it still stands that we are a rich country with more than enough to go around.)

No I def wouldn't - not as a lifestyle choice.

Did you date my exH, OP?

I wouldn't do it again. God, it is really, really hard to fancy a man you've lost all respect for because he won't pull his weight and needs providing for. Literally, he didn't see why he should. And he's done it again with wife 2.0. She tells me every year he's going to get a job this year.

DH no.2 works part-time, as do I. We've decided to live more modestly than we might do otherwise, partly because we both have tendencies to depression/anxiety and do better with less stress. And that's really important to me as I have a daughter, and for my own health, and so there's time to develop my craft hobby into a small business. So I'm all for working less; but we pay our way.

The red flag here is him challenging your right to decide you don't want to date him. Maybe you've dodged a bullet?

I wouldn't be attracted to a man who had no drive or ambition.

Hope, but at least 2 family members had dc with people like this - one of them told me ‘working is for fools and horses’. Surprisingly, neither relationship lasted more than 10 years and sadly they’ve infected their dc with their own special lack of work ethic.

So I do think someone will have him, that doesn’t mean it’s a good choice!.

With that attitude I would give him a second glance. It would stick in my craw the fact that my taxes were going towards his choosing to sit on his backside and claim benefits, just because he didn't fancy working. If there was a medical reason or he was trying hard to get work, that's different of course. But that doesn't seem the case here. He has a very high opinion of himself by the sounds of it. Unbelievable!

Not a chance in hell. Maybe if they had inherited wealth and spent their time volunteering and doing something creative or similar but a career benefit claimant? Gross

Not in the situation you describe, OP. I don't understand (as in, I don't think I could feel attracted or connected to) someone who didn't have a purpose in life. If they had inherited millions or won the lottery I would still find it odd if they didn't do something (charity work, pursue a hobby that took up most of their time).