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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

Need help leaving once and for all

114 replies

Dancetothebeat32 · 11/03/2018 09:07

As I type I am sat with my 2 year old shaking and crying, he has hit me for the last time today, I truly mean it. I am scrawling through women's aid and refuge, waiting for the police to arrive my other 2 children are still in bed I feel like such a failure to them for allowing this to go on for so long

OP posts:

Mary1935 · 13/03/2018 22:57

Hope your ok Dance. Thinking of you.

JD360 · 14/03/2018 00:24

It takes a while to finally make the brake. But when you know you have to do it you do it. It will get better I hope everything is okay and you have all the support you need

Italiangreyhound · 14/03/2018 02:08

Hope you are OK, OP.

NeverTell9871 · 14/03/2018 03:37

Thinking of you

RedPanda25 · 14/03/2018 08:20

I've just read all of this thread and wanted to say that I think you are amazing and so strong. I really hope you managed to sleep last night.

Original poster

Dancetothebeat32 · 15/03/2018 13:20

Hi, sorry I haven't been back on sooner but it has been a whirlwind couple of days and I just needed to recoup my mind

We are safe and well, the journey went as smoothly as it could, the eldest are just happy to be out of the toxic environment, the little one is happy wherever I am.

I am just going through the motions,
One minute in fine the next bawling my eyes out.... I think I am in a state of shock and it is going to take me a long time to come to terms with what's gone on the ast couple of years, I'm feeling so many emotions it is hard to pinpoint...... but the most I feel is relief and know that I have done the right thing for me and my babies.

He is not allowed to contact me whatsoever which has made it so much easier not having to listen to the manipulation and desperation....I'm just taking my day as it comes, the rough with the smooth and looking to the future

The support on this thread has been amazing, truly believe that I may not have got through those first crucial hours without the help I received on here.......so thankyou from the bottom of my heart because you helped me to change our lives for the better xx

OP posts:

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 15/03/2018 14:05

That is fabulous news OP!

Well done.

You're bound to be feeling emotional, you've been on a rollercoaster. Be kind to yourself. I think all you can do at the moment is exactly what you are doing - taking it one step at a time.

Just cuddle your babies and look forward to the rest of your life.

Icepinkeskimo · 15/03/2018 14:13

Dancetothebeat32 I cant even describe how happy seeing your post has made me today, I was worried so about you and the children.
As the previous poster has wrote yes be kind to yourself, and now you can look to the future, a smile on your face. The tears will stop eventually, and you will face each day without dread.

Dragongirl10 · 15/03/2018 15:07

DANCE......another one so glad to hear your update!

Very, very happy for your family and l am sure the tears will gradually ease (maybe think about some couselling later)and all good things ahead.

Never be taken in again by him or any other man, keep that guard up and make any potential guy really prove his worth before you give him the time of day.

Original poster

Dancetothebeat32 · 15/03/2018 15:34

All these lovely kind words are making me very emotional right now,

The support I have had off people in RL has just been immense, and in here too

When you are told for so long that you are worthless and nobody cares about you, you truly start to believe it.....I won't lie I am a complete bag of nerves and I know it's a long road ahead of me and these 3 to finding a new sense of normality but I am just so glad that I finally made the break

For any other woman/man living under the regime of domestic violence and are reading this thread I am proof that you can break away and make a better life, because for me anything is better than the existence I had 6 days ago

Thankyou all and I will keep you all updated as to how we are coping..... probably be sick of me posting in the.end

OP posts:

Adora10 · 15/03/2018 15:45

Never be sick of you OP, you are an inspiration!!!

BewareOfDragons · 15/03/2018 15:47

I'm glad you are away and safe with your children.

One day at a time.

Find someone to talk it all through with.

Stay strong ... and remember that even strong people need support and have days where they struggle ... you can do this.

Good luck OP.

Mrstobe90 · 15/03/2018 18:20

So glad it went well! Sending positive vibes your way xxx

Mary1935 · 15/03/2018 20:20

Am really pleased for you Dance - well done and you will go from strength to strength. Take care

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