Brave Babes (Hygge) Battle Bus: Snowed in and Drinking Hot Chocolate instead of wine

[SweetLathyrus]

Hi, I'm SweetLathyrus, Sweet for short, and I've been on and off Gerald the Brave Babes Battle Bus since 2014. Over the years, lots of us have maintained the thread, most of all the lovely Mouse, who has been here since the early days, and still scurries onboard when she can.

The bus is a place of support, safety and occasional silliness for those of us struggling with our relationship with alcohol. Some of us are sober, some are trying to be, some are moderating and aren't ready to give up alcohol just yet.

So whatever your reason for questioning the whys and WTFs of your drinking, hop on board, make yourselves comfortable and join in. Driers and Triers, all welcome.

2018 has been a busy year so far, lots of new travellers as well as old faces; if you want to read back on the journey through Dry or Dryer Jan and Feb so far, here's the link to the last thread

And in case you want to know how it all started, here is the link to JWN's original, inspiring thread

We've donned the snow chains, topped up the antifreeze, and turned the heaters up to loud, so even though it's cold outside, our welcome is always warm, so hop on and join us.

Also I am scared that if I allow myself a glass of wine this evening I will not stop and need a clear head for the mountain of work awaiting me when I get this fucking nightmare presentation out of the way

It sounds like a nightmare looking! Not helped by the indecisiveness of your co-presenter.

I truly hope everything works out and you get through it with your nerves intact

Remember to take it hour by hour tonight. The only thing worse that a shit day at work, is a shit day at work with a hangover! Stay strong xx

Clearview wise words indeed! Made it through and hopefully won't have to have to do that for a while now (though apparently it went well - but hoping there won't be many more events near me as it's written and done now so anyone can present it)

Tempted to have a large wine when I get home but shall go via Step and Spin classes on the way and hopefully will feel too healthy to spoil it. First dry day since last Thursday

What are the rest of you all up to tonight? (I shall be unblocking a drain when I get back from the gym. Being newly single isn't all upsides like choosing the TV channel and more space in the wardrobe, as I am finding out.)

Hope there are upsides though. The adjustment is going to be huge but you are doing it. You are, you're doing it! Just take it one day at a time. Stay off the booze. The presentation is behind you now and the blocked drain will be too. Baby steps.

How do you get on with Becks Blue? It's good in a pinch. Don't worry about healthy eating for now. Bung a pizza in and just get through the day without a drink x

Well done looking - you made it through the shit work. Sorry only just got back from my client so reading the thread now. Step away from the wine and go to step!

I know exactly how you feel about a 9-5 easy job - sometimes I would love to just be on a checkout with a beep etc. Do you have any options to change jobs if it is really bad?

clear good idea on the bath. I took a bottle of Radox muscle soak with me skiing this year and I'm certain it helped - usually we just buy some random bottle in the french supermarket but this year I was thinking ahead! I will aim to get some tomorrow and or epsom salts...my legs will loosen up shortly but they're out of running practise since Jan.

I've already got into bed. Am absolutely shattered, been a manic day client-side and I need to be in again tomorrow. One of the two people I've recruited starts on Monday so was making plans to get them in today along with a whole heap of other chaos. My mindset is a million times better now I've got my team sorted out.

OK going to sign off and put my pjs on now!

Hope I'm glad the presentation went well. I suffer with imposter syndrome too and it's awful. Really anxiety inducing. I think I've spent years trying to drown my lack of confidence in alcohol. It's hard. I think being single will be good for you in the long run though even if it does involve unblocking drains!

Ma I don't think I could manage that many different types of plant! I had high hopes of growing all my own salad and veg when we moved here but it's not happened so far.

Hope everyone's having a good evening. I've been in bed since 8. Reading a really good book. It's the first of a trilogy and I can't put it down.

Morning all - am up with the larks again. I was also in bed at 8 baking. Cannot keep my eyes open much past 9 at the moment but love these light mornings...just want it to be a little bit warmer and then I can have my coffee in the garden between 6 and 7 :).

Am off to the client for the day and then we're jumping in the car and down to the coast tonight - haven't been down for 2 weeks so cannot wait. Taking our cat with us as next door are replacing their fence imminently and it may send him a bit loopy.

Cannot wait to see the sea and have a chill - have date night lined up tomorrow at a spanish restaurant (I will be driving) and then just a ton of relaxing...good times.

Have a good day all. xxx

Morning all
Hope well done on the presentation. I find when presented with about 50 people all in one room it is very intimidating so I feel your pain! But you do get through it as you say.
Morning Twattage great that you are getting back into your running. I used to love it and belonged to a running club but after twisting my knee and ankle when playing netball I am resigned to very low impact exercise now. Zumba is great though and tonight I will be doing spinning.
Hopefully I have turned a corner after a few “down” weeks and starting to get my exercise mojo back. Definitely helps when not drinking. Also for the past couple of months I have been taking all sorts of supplements such as iron, magnesium, vitamin D, evening primrose to try and lift my mood and sleeping patterns whilst going through the change.
Last week I went to doctors as was feeling a bit down and emotional and exhausted and she is sending me for a blood test next Monday for practically everything. So I decided to come off the supplements until then so that there would be a true reading at the blood test. Surprisingly my mood has lifted this week. I’ve not been drinking and this always helps. Maybe it’s all psychological because I’m hoping she will pinpoint something but there is no doubt that I have more of a “boing” since stopping the supplements.
Baking sounds like you are doing amazing this year staying AF. I did Dry January with you and you have just taken it to another level. You must feel proud.
Anyway hi to all the other babes and I hope you have a good day

Morning all.

hope so please the presentation went well...at least you can relax a bit now

I woke to a realisation this morning. I have thought for the last few years that I was starting with rosacea as I had really red cheeks most of the time. Since giving up booze 11 days ago, the redness has dramatically reduced. Perhaps it's a coincidence but I think not

I also ran my quickest 6 mile last night and am feeling more positive this morning about a difficult work project I have been dreading.

twattage I know what you mean about a 9-5 easy job. I found myself envying the co-op staff this morning wondering if they ever lose sleep over their job in the same way I do. Might have to rethink the work life balance once I kick the booze demons ass!

baking 8 o'clock bedtime sounds like a dream...I may have to aim for that tonight with a good book

trust hope you're feeling better soon xx

Twattage I'm waiting to be able to sit out in the early morning too. We're always up between 5.30 & 6am. I'm just a bit nervous it'll make me want to smoke. I'm starting to get the odd craving now the weather's picking up.

Trust I definitely think not drinking improves your mood. It's made a big difference to mine although I was kind of hoping for a miracle cure and that's not happened. I still get very anxious on and off. I've never tried zumba or any gym kind of exercise. I've never been in a gym. Sometimes I think I should give it a go. The only regular exercise I do is swimming.

Clear I also envy supermarket staff at times. They don't have to worry about an error getting them struck off! But then I think it's all relative really as they probably live in fear of their tills not balancing or miscounting something. I kind of think it wouldn't matter what job I did I'd still go home and worry. It's the way I'm made.

Not much happening with me today. I'm about to collect DS from nursery. I'm going out for a meal with friends tomorrow night. I've volunteered to drive. I'm not as nervous about being AF as I was last time.

Evening all - going into the sidecar for one night now.

clear - the redness will be the booze, however depending how much you've caned it you may have some permanent redness. I have my face lasered now once a year as I am very fair anyway so I always go bright red anyway irrespective of booze!

For a whole face lasering you're looking at around £150-200 but I've also had the small blood vessels around my nose done for around £70 in central London. I would wait to see how it settles - certainly I'm looking quite pale right now after pretty 2 weeks fully off.

Night all. Off to the coast now with my boy. x

Thanks twattage. I never thought of lasering but I'll see how much it calms down and review gives me yet another reason to stay off the drink

Have a fab time and enjoy the sea and the spanish food xx

Morning all babes - I'm up early again!!!

That will be because after stepping into the sidecar I was fully back on the bus yesterday. Went into town for an amazing tapas (I can still taste the garlic now) - we had patatas, meatballs, prawns, mushrooms, hamon, croquettes - total nommers. I drove both ways :).

The weather's not great (did we have summer last week) but it's so nice to be out of London. V little planned for the weekend other than a run. I may do it this morning (feeling a bit full) or my pause until tomorrow.

Hope all babes got through Friday evening in one piece. I've had a really good week actually when I think back. This one night a week thing is really working for me at the moment. Feeling a million times better than earlier this year. xxx

I was up at 8 which is early for me on a Saturday. Got a new bed so will be assembling it later.

I'm guessing there will be a few regrets from last night for some of us but today is a brand new day. If nothing else, maybe just commit to saving a fiver and not drinking today.

Have a good day babes

Woohoo I've just run 5k on the beach for the first time since Jan.

I'm feeling amazing today!!!

Morning all. Just had a difficult conversation with WB about DS’s 18th. I am trying to be fair and inclusive when it would be so easier not to be but feel it is being thrown back in my face sometimes. Off to gym now. On day 4 not drinking but will no doubt have a glass of something on Monday to toast DS. It’s all very tricky. Work continues to be super stressful, house is a tip and I am not built for conflict (or housework it seems). Love all you early risers and runners out there... I’ll return to read back later. Have an amazing Saturday friends x

Well done Twattage! There's something satisfying about beach running. Go you!

Hope All you can do is try your best and aim not to let it upset you too much. It's bound to be awkward because the splits so recent and WBs an arse.

Faire Is the bed up yet?

I had a good sober time yesterday. Enjoyed the meal. So much easier driving myself/other people. No hanging around etc. Food could've been better but the night was good.

Today we were on a train to the city at 9am! This would never have happened if I'd drunk last night. We had lunch out, looked at toys, went to the museum. Behaved like tourists basically.

Anyone who's been dry and then introduced alcohol back in. How did you do it? Did you regret it?

Evening all - quiet around these parts again! I hope that doesn't mean there are a lot of sore heads today?

baking - no I don't regret it but have to remain vigilant. Are you thinking of trying to moderate?

faire - I am currently on the original thread and I can see you were posting in Jan 2012. You seem to be doing well - have you been dry since then (sorry if I'm being nosy).

I've done absolutely nothing apart today apart from read the paper and come back to London. I am feeling slimmer so need to get on the old scales tomorrow and see what's what.

x

Oh wow 2012 that seems such a long time. I've never been completely dry Twattage because that's not what I wanted. Although I'm getting close these days.

I'm one of those 'controlled' drinkers who drinks mindfully (and rides the roof rack on the bus). These days I drink on high days and holidays. Most of the time I much prefer a cup of tea and a good book.

The bed is up! It's not mine, it's for ds and will be a surprise for him when he comes home from uni in a few weeks. It's one of those light up ones.

Ah I see - I guess I am also on the roof rack with you!

I know what you mean about tea and book. I am on a mission in 2018 to get through the backlog of my kindle wishlist. I'm a total bookworm but I've had years where I've barely read due to prioritising booze over almost everything else. x

Hi all, back from a very sober but very enjoyable weekend in Cheshire. Must admit to feeling a bit smug when sat around friends at breakfast who were nursing the morning hangovers

twattage - well done on the beach run x

Hope everyone else had a fantastic weekend xx

Twattage I'm considering moderating. I never intended to be dry. I just didn't want to be drinking daily. But I'm fearful I won't have the self control and it'll creep back up. I'm doing so well at not smoking too and for me it's all linked together. I quite like being sober in some ways. I do a lot more but at the same time I feel like I'm missing something. It's silly. I had 15 years of getting wasted pre DS.

Clearview Glad your weekend was good. Cheshire's a lovely area. It's good you enjoyed it sober too.

I've come up to bed as I'm really enjoying the trilogy of books I'm reading. I'm half way through the 2nd. Started them last Monday. I'm trying not to stay up too late. It's hard when you get really into something.

Hope everyone else is good. Where are you all?

Morning all - 10 hours sleep last night! On the subject of books, I am also reading a series at the mo (not in the correct order annoyingly) but I think I passed out at 8.30 or before.

baking - it's been 4 months hasn't it? I would give it a bit longer being entirely dry and see how you feel. How do you feel this morning? I see that was posted quite late on! Much easier to feel the call in the evening!

clear - well done :). How did you find the evenings?

It's the end of the month and I am taking stock (it's also invoice day - always a good feeling to bill the client) - this has been my dryest month since Jan by quite some way. Not perfect given I had that run of 8 days going crazy in week 2.

Aim for May is 26 dry days and to get some weight off. I've basically been maintaining in a stone bracket that I really don't like to see since coming back from skiing, so I've still got 12 pounds to shift off before my holiday on 1 September.

I feel like April has been a real transitional month for me between old, creeping bad habits and going back mainly to sobriety. Roll on May and hopefully some sunshine for longer than a few days! Coffee in the garden 6-7 awaits me.

Have a good day all - I'm WFH today which I'm quite pleased about as the weather is dreadful.

x

Morning all. My lovely DS is 18 today. Feeling emotional. We all have work and college/school so celebrating tonight in a low key sort of way and have decided to involve WB as a) want to do the right thing and b) don't want to create resentment. But worried it will be awkward and am also sad. It's ended up a far cry from the family life I dreamed about when he was born by traumatic c-section 18 years ago and became the love of my life. I feel I have let the kids down by not making a better marriage and family life. Even by being an only child with older parents who were both dead by the time he was 5. To make it worse my oldest friend posted a soppy post on FB last night about how it is 25 years since she met her (wonderful and successful and supportive) DH and I remember her son's 18th last year which was a party in their huge country house with a live band in the garden and over 150 friends and family. That is the sort of life I envisioned but WB and his family don't mix well and my family are non existent. So just me and the kids. DS has plenty of friends and is more excited about celebrating with them next week. He always reassures me he is happy. But still ... can't help reflecting on the day he becomes an adult, thinking I could have given him a better childhood if I'd been married to someone else or just had the bottle (and support) to bail out earlier. Anyway... off to wake him up with some embarrassing maternal gushing. Have a good day all xxx

Ps Baking, Twattage,Clearview, Faire am full of admiration for all your abstinence, exercising, reading and positivity at the moment. Am determined to adopt a more positive mental attitude in May after finding the last 2 weeks of April utterly overwhelming post-holiday. Shall look to you all for inspiration