Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Dating Thread 129 - Time to put a new spring in your step

999 replies

RunsforCake14 · 21/02/2018 20:14

Dating thread rules:

  1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
  2. Develop a thick skin.
  3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
  4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
  5. Trust your gut instinct.
  6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
  7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
  8. If it's not fun, stop.
  9. Loo update is mandatory.
10. No dating the thread
OP posts:
Thread gallery
20
Kinunir · 26/02/2018 17:31

As bad as I've ever known in my life by a long, long way Val

ValMc1 · 26/02/2018 17:33

Kin - well perhaps you need to scratch it then Grin

SpringtimeSun · 26/02/2018 17:39

Kin if you're not in the right place for that other site, it might scratch that itch but you'll feel much worse after.

Have you had clear pictures from her and preferably chatted on the phone? Many on that site are NOT who they say they are.

Kinunir · 26/02/2018 17:40

Couple of pics on the site and messages exchanged there is all Spring

SpringtimeSun · 26/02/2018 17:43

I wouldn't meet anyone from there without chatting or having a social 1st.
Or you're likely to have an 'interesting' story to tell us.
I'd be vary of any woman who's happy to meet a man who's new to the site and unverified without chatting on the phone 1st.......what's she hiding......

Kinunir · 26/02/2018 17:45

I've never used such site before and have no idea of the protocol - does this sound dodgy?

saveyourkissesforme · 26/02/2018 17:47

Are you going to her house or meeting in a bar? If you're meeting in a bar then that's a good chance to check each other out. A bit different if you're going to her house.

esk1mo · 26/02/2018 17:47

kin you’ve waited long enough...whats a few more days/weeks for the right woman?

it’d be worse if you got there and she didnt want to DTD. id probably advise against, but alas, you know your needs Grin

SpringtimeSun · 26/02/2018 17:49

It sounds dodgy Hmm sorry

Kinunir · 26/02/2018 17:49

Her house. I've never, ever dtd with someone I've never had an emotional attachment to. The thought of changing that, being a 'bad boy' even, excites and scares me in equal measure. Think I'm going to pass as she was cagey about even giving her number out which I kind of overlooked.

esk1mo My real fear here is that my judgement is skewed and I might end up using someone by mistake.

SpringtimeSun · 26/02/2018 17:51

Her reaction to you asking to video chat should tell you all you need to know.

Use an excuse to keep your options open but in the mean time ask her to video chat.

BeenThereDating · 26/02/2018 17:53

Kin you need to meet her for a coffee or drink and a chat somewhere neutral. Then if you hit it off you both know it's not dinner that's on the agenda. Please tell me you're not going straight to her place. She might be even older than she says!!

saveyourkissesforme · 26/02/2018 17:53

What Spring says.

And if you 'lose' her as a result that may be no bad thing.

BeenThereDating · 26/02/2018 18:01

Spring how is anyone 'verified' for goodness sake? For the record I rarely speak on the phone so your 'safety' advice is skewed.

Kin It's simple. It's no different to a normal date. You behave exactly as you would on a normal site. You meet in a public place, you have a drink, a chat, spend an hour seeing if she's who she says she is, see if there's chemistry and then you decide if you go back to hers. Anything else is reckless. She might be 75 or a bloke.

SpringtimeSun · 26/02/2018 18:05

Been Because on this particular site there is a verification process to prove that someone is genuine.
This can be by video chat or in person.
Getting verified is an accepted part of the process and forms a kind of 'review process' because you can choose to make some or all our none of these verifications public so others no you are genuine and what kinda person you are.

BeenThereDating · 26/02/2018 18:15

Thank you Spring. There's no way I'd allow myself to be 'verified' on any dating site, let alone a hook up one, other than administrators checking my photos are of a human. I've used a few hookup sites over the years and fortunately not had to do that. I would never do a video call and I rarely hand out a phone number before the first meet and either communicate through KIK or the dating site until I've met them and verified them my way! I'd get 0/10 on that site then.

Lovemusic33 · 26/02/2018 18:24

Kin I has someone come to my house for MB, we had chatted a lot first and to begin with we were going to meet for coffee first but then decided to have coffee at mine. It’s not something I usually do but it was naughty and fun. He’s just messaged me today asking when we can do it again. I have no attachemebt to him at all, I know he’s not relationship material and I wouldn’t ever want a realationshio with him (he’s quite childish and not my type).

I’m still laid up with tooth ache, now on antibiotics until I can get the tooth pulled out. Can’t arrange any dates as I don’t know when I will feel up to anything.

I do have a new iron who lives very near by, he seems interesting so far so hopefully I can meet him when I’m feeling better.

ignoringthechoc · 26/02/2018 18:44

Runs Sorry you are feeling low, try and remember any unattractive traits he had that you are glad to not see any more, nose picking, farting etc.
Vet shame Mr BBC (yes I wondered Kin) is not a contender, it's definitely the way it goes, the ones I like are way less keen than the ones I'm not fussed about- sod's law.
Margo Hometime kiss was indeed yummy, absolutely kicking myself I didn't get his number (or even name!- was quite drunk)
Hope Mr Wales turns out to be nice.
Pud Will need to be more than just well endowed to get your attention off Mr Perfect, but there may be someone worthy out there.
I'm talking to a few,

ignoringthechoc · 26/02/2018 18:45

oops pressed send before adding....but not really being blown away by any :)

VetOnCall · 26/02/2018 19:03

Call me dim but what else does BBC stand for?! I'm assuming it's something that Sir David of Attenborough wouldn't want to be associated with...

Kinunir · 26/02/2018 19:04

Big Black Cock @ Vet

ignoringthechoc · 26/02/2018 19:07

Sir David might talk about big black cobras and he wouldn't be a million miles away :)
But no we cannot sully his name by mentioning the two in a post, imagine if he google searched himself!

ignoringthechoc · 26/02/2018 19:08

Not driving then Kin?

Kinunir · 26/02/2018 19:09

I’m in a pub car park, waiting...

ignoringthechoc · 26/02/2018 19:10

Hope it goes well x