Dating Thread 129 - Time to put a new spring in your step

[RunsforCake14]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread

Thanks all. I have boring paperwork to do this morning but I'll be very busy this afternoon and evening, so no time to think of him.

MissCatt our relationship was far from turbulent. It seemed to be going really well. We'd discussed plans for Christmas and beyond then suddenly he ended it with no warning and no explanation. He swore blind there was no one else and wanted to be friends. He stayed in touch occasionally until just after Christmas then I decided it was best not keep contact with him.

I've unfriended him now. But he has no privacy settings. The whole world can see his post!

Runs I can see how that situation makes it all the harder to understand then. Things going well... then boom! It does sound like maybe there was someone else infiltrating around that time... but who knows, and you may never know the truth. And it's more important you focus on yourself rather than what he's doing. I'm sure you 'got this'!

Yes, unfriending is one thing, but by blocking him (he doesn't have to be a friend for you to do that) then you won't have to see anything he posts and there's no risk of peeking. He won't be able to see your FB either. It'll be like neither of your profiles exist to each other. But I'm sure you know that.

If I might add, it doesn't sound like he treated you very well or gave you the sort of rational, respectful ending that you deserved, especially after making plans etc and having a good relationship before. I've had the whole 'let's be friends' thing too from Mr Headfuck and then a day later he announces a new woman. I told him to eff off. Then, a few days after that, he sent me naked pics of himself and lewd messages. I'm sure new woman would have been thrilled. He basically wanted me on his reserve list in case new woman didn't work out... anyway, I digress! Good you have a busy afternoon and won't be thinking of him.

Ok, I've just had to make notes to try and keep up with you all (not joking either).

Love, Tech & Cover - sorry you are all feeling poorly but hope you are on the mend soon.

Vet & Spring between Spraying & Splooging it is hard to keep track of all the bodily fluids. Jesus wept, what are people like?!

Esk1mo - great news on the third date.

Kin - really sorry steak & vino didn't happen & I second or third what all the others have said about not going on holiday with the woman who doesn't do sex for two years.

Ignoring - the kiss before hometime sounds yummy.

Alison - need to know more about why Mr East End is so hot you have come over all marriagable.

Smeaton - exciting about the date.

Runs - really sorry about the FB post from your ex. I struggled when my ex got re-married. Stuff like that just sucks, but you've got to remember all the reasons they are a twat.

So, I'm still chatting to my potential date - Mr Wales. Looks like, blizzards permitting, we're going to meet on Thursday. His DC are a bit younger than mine, well one of them is quite a lot younger, but I'm trying not to let that put me off at this stage.

Had my first approach from a woman on POF, which took me by surprise as I'm not bi or a lesbian. If I were a bloke, or into other women, she looks hot and she seemed very keen, but I'm not, so she's wasting her time trying to tempt me.

Runs that is shitty. Sounds to me that she overlapped with you. Horrible pain but you are better off without him.

Cover god that old fella and custard. Mindboggling!

One month dry here -and the very attractive delivery man is in danger. !

Trouble is I do have willing volunteers but for various reasons don't want to go there.

I see fisticuffs over Kin and his holiday (no actually a great move to give to a deserving neighbour. Well done) And well done re NC for Ms I in future - that is the way of healing!

Nice iron has disappeared and new ones aren't interesting. Its all now on the speed dating later this week. No pressure. At least going with a good mate so will be a laugh

Vet Glad you have a good date at last

Rosy welcome back. I dont like an age gap like that myself. 7 years each side is usually ok -except when body and mind are so attractive you cant resist- I wouldnt get too far ahead to be honest - a lot to navigate before that.

I haven't had the date yet Mum, I'm meeting Mr BBC today for a coffee as I'm going to be driving right past where he lives. I'm typing this from the M5 services, it's all glamour in my life

Runs I'm really sorry, that sucks. It's easy to say don't dwell on stuff like this but it's bloody hard not to even when you know it does no good. Onwards and upwards x

Pog I'm assuming he doesn't get many takers

Vet think of the 'alternative' sites as Crufts for Cocks. There are a variety of poses to which you can attribute scores and the Best in Class rosette could be awarded to a Great Dane or a Chihuahua...

I think I'd be looking for a nice Labrador, medium sized but sturdy, attractive and always up for some action

Kin - Sorry steak night didn't work out. Hope you have some luck with the adult sites

Bloody - I know its rough but it really is their loss.

Margo - I would keep an open mind re the children especially until you have met him.

Mum - Good luck with the speed dating.

Get well vibes for all those who need them x

Looking forward to my date with Mr SA on Wednesday. He has gone very quiet on the messaging front since arranging the date. To be fair we didn't exchange that many messages before he asked me out so I suspect he is not really keen on messaging people loads before meeting. I hope this is not an ominous sign though.

I have one other potential iron who I shall call Mr Bull. Good looking, shared interests and similar sense of humour. We have not been chatting all that long but I think I may actually like him more than Mr SA. I don't know much about him still but I suspect it is going to be fun finding out.

I have learnt this week how unattractive neediness and over eagerness are. After exchanging literally a couple of messages with a guy he declared that I was his perfect woman and proceed to ask me out. I unmatched sharpish.

I also am going Speed Dating at the weekend again with a friend. Never been before so don't know what to expect but it surely can't be worse than trawling the dating sites.

Vet Hope it goes well with Mr BBC.

And Vet if you can teach the Lab to come when you whistle well you'll need a drawer full of treats...

Good luck with your coffee. I have high hopes. Having been an expat child I find that mention of the BBC reassures me and gives me faith even if that makes me an anachronism.

Am I the only one who wonders whether BBC refers to his job or... I must behave.

Vista I've had some interest, I have a few hours to decide whether to progress with it. Think I'm only considering it because Miss I has left me with an outrageous need for MB.

Mum Good luck with the speed dating. Never done it myself, but it sounds like fun.

Margot Fingers crossed Mr Wales turns out to be the kind of guy you'd like to get snowed in with.

runs that’s so shitty and would really knock me too.... hope you can dust yourself off and get out and meet someone much better.

I have an evening date on a Wednesday (snow permitting) with my first POF iron 😊.

Typically FWB is being a lot more friendly after I decided to pull back. Think there is too much potential to fall for him and be hurt so I’m hoping Mr POF will be nice enough to divert my mind. He is very attentive, kind, keen so w shall see....

What does the SA stand for Vista?

hatty44, fingers crossed for your date on Weds. Sounds better than potential over-investment in Mr FWB.

Looking forward to hearing how Vets coffee goes with Mr BBC!

Margo if my memory serves me correctly, SA is South African.

vet good luck with Mr BBC. I admire your energy for dating.

I recovered quickly from this weeks hangover, was a great night though. One guy I was chatting with who was totally wasted, added me to Facebook yesterday. We have mutual friends (one of them is my good female friend) and she said "you should go for it, rumour is he is hung like a donkey". If only I fancied him........

Signed up to POF today, tried to delete my account as I can't pay anything here (not sure why wouldn't accept my payment) so its a bit limited, but cannot for 24 hours.

An old contact from before xmas popped up yesterday on tinder, we started chatting again. I really like this guy, but he is a busy boy and its difficult to actually find the time to meet. He has really nice warm eyes. Also chatting with a cute guy from Cape Verde (Portuguese). Portuguese Jason Mamoa never replied to my message....boooooo.

I still

Pudding POF is free back in Blighty. You can pay for an upgrade but I think it adds very little. I know some people confuse POF with Plenty More Fish which you do have to pay for (I've never tried Plenty More Fish) so thought I'd mention it. Chances are you have to pay outside of the UK though.

Pud - I was in Cape Verde a couple of weeks ago - a good contact to have - wish I was back there now brrrrrrr

It went ok with Mr BBC, he's very nice, interesting, considerate... but he didn't pass the kitchen worktop/looming test I couldn't imagine kissing him, although to be fair I barely ever get that on first meetings. He looks older than in his photos and he's already at the very top of the age range that I go for. He's keen to meet again (of course! If I'd fancied him I would never hear from him again) and I think I would like to see him again but I don't see anything romantic coming out of it. Bollocks! I'm disappointed as otherwise he's perfect for me.

runs
just wnted to say my dd had the same thing happen to her
The guy said could they still be friends and then even proceeded to send her a picture on watts app of the two of them together
Just no empathy whatsoever
However she has now met a lovely guy who is worth a 100 of this guy but i know how hurtful it can be
The ex had the audacity to say to her he didnt think she was worth the effort she was too nice and just because you are nice dont expect someone to be nice back - shocking I was livid on your bike mate
Interestingly he seemed quite proud of the fact his friends thought he was heartless
She is with an absolutely lovely guy now so hopefully there is light at the end of the tunnel

Twenty minutes to decide whether or not to jump in the car and go meet a much older women from an 'alternative site'. We've barely spoken, I'm really not sure about the kitchen worktop, I can't help but feel it's seedy still but... I has needs after being dicked around for so many months.

I'm not normally indecisive...

Which way are you leaning Kin?

Kin - the one local to me? Just to warn you - it has snowed heavy here but ok now but think more is on the way - you may get snowed in😋

I know I'm a damn good catch and, yet, Miss I has certainly left me feeling 'undesirable' for now save - I fear I'm leaning in a direction I'm not overly comfortable with.

I'm not an expert but surely you will chat first and then 'decide'. Worth a flutter?

It's a 40-45 minute drive normally but likely to be much worse with rush hour traffic on the M25. Also the idea of snow is putting me off. Think I need talking out of it to be honest.

kin if it is that one, you'll be lucky to do it in that time - the M1 can be a sod at this time of night - particularly the junction you need to get off at. How bad is the itch you need to scratch?