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Original poster

Anyone ever shagged anyone out of spite?

80 replies

SwanVests · 08/02/2018 20:06

I’m considering it. I do actually quite fancy having sex with him but I’m not sure if that’s because I deeply enjoy the thought of his entire life crumbling around him as a result. He’s married obviously but he thoroughly, thoroughly deserves some kind of comeuppance. This is the only way I can think of him getting it.

OP posts:
StrawberryMummy90 · 08/02/2018 20:08
Hmm
FucksakeCuntingFuckingTwats · 08/02/2018 20:10

Well his life wouldn't just crumble would it? What makes you sure he'd shag you?

Confused24 · 08/02/2018 20:10

Confused what on earth makes you think this is a good idea??

Casmama · 08/02/2018 20:12

I think this must be some sort of twisted self-hatred on your part. You literally want to fuck his life up.

TheButterflyOfTheStorms · 08/02/2018 20:12

No. Just no.

BeanoNoir · 08/02/2018 20:12

Is he propositioning you? I’d think about the other people whose lives you might destroy with this too. Others may not agree with this but getting some evidence of his behaviour and telling wife may be doing her a favour and getting at him as well, without shagging him, which would just be wrong imo.

PatriciaHolm · 08/02/2018 20:12

What about your marriage?

NewYearNiki · 08/02/2018 20:13

One fuck with you would crumble his life Confused

How?

How would anyone even know unless you went all Fatal Attraction on his arse and told his wife, abducted his kids, etc.

Even if his wife divorced him life goes on, people divorce all the time.

You are not so important that you would irrevocably ruin his life forever

Original poster
SwanVests · 08/02/2018 20:13

Because he’s messaged me and made it quite clear he wants to shag me. This man ruined my life. He’s ever so successful and smug and no one can see what a monumental cunt he is. He made out I was a liar after he drugged and raped me as a teenager, told everyone he had no idea who I was or why I’d say those things. So, tbh even just the messages he’s sent me would kind of fuck him over.

OP posts:
Chaosofcalm · 08/02/2018 20:13

Why his entire life do you mean it will cause lots of stress and upset to the people in his life? As in you want to do this to upset this wife? That is very odd OP.

NK1cf53daaX127805d4fd5 · 08/02/2018 20:13

No. I can't imagine I'd walk away feeling too good about myself if I did.

Original poster
SwanVests · 08/02/2018 20:13

And yeah, it probably is self hatred. But I still hate him more than I hate myself.

OP posts:
PatriciaHolm · 08/02/2018 20:14

You know it would all end up being your fault again. And you would lose your relationship too.

NewYearNiki · 08/02/2018 20:14

Big drip feed

Chaosofcalm · 08/02/2018 20:14

Cross posts. I don’t think having sex with him is going to make you feel better OP. It is time to cut all communication with him and focus on what is best for you.

SendintheArdwolves · 08/02/2018 20:16

This comeuppance he deserves - you think his spouse deserves being cheated on as well?

Also I don't think that (morality aside) this is really going to go the way you think - so presumably you shag him, then out him as a cheater and hope his marriage ends?

So much can go wrong - you already sound far too emotionally invested in him and there is a high probability that you would sleep with him once, then again, then somehow "find yourself" in an affair with him.

Just say you do out him to his spouse - what makes you think she'll chuck him out? Most people's response to infidelity is to (at least initially) circle the wagons and desperately try to save the marriage. He'll chuck you under the bus, tell them spouse you're crazy and vindictive and trying to ruin his life - and he'd kind of have a point, wouldn't he?

TheVanguardSix · 08/02/2018 20:16

You want to fuck him over by treating yourself like chopped liver.
Slow clap for an incredibly shit idea.

You're worth way more than that. Rid yourself of this past trauma in a healthy way, one which will allow you to value yourself more. Why would this guy even have your number?

BeanoNoir · 08/02/2018 20:17

I’m sorry for what you have been through. Have you spoken to a professional? Either a counsellor who can help you and what this will have done to you, or some advice on whether you can get a prosecution. Please don’t attempt to mess with his life in the way you are thinking, I fear you will only mess your own up more.

SendintheArdwolves · 08/02/2018 20:19

Just seen your update - I'm so sorry to hear about what he did to you. He sounds like a vile human being and deserves a comeuppance.

But not like this - do not sleep with him. Get as far away from him as you can.

Original poster
SwanVests · 08/02/2018 20:26

I have had counselling but am completely unable to accept that he’s been able to do this with absolutely no consequences. It’s all just a big fuck up.

OP posts:
HoursOfFun · 08/02/2018 20:27

I completely understand your feelings but I think this would be very risky for lots of reasons - not least it could be psychologically damaging to you.

Years ago after an abusive relationship I tried kind of 'hate fucking' the wanker after it had ended to try and get closure or something (iif it sounds crazy, I was very vulnerable st the time). I caused myself no end of confusion and regretted it.

Ancientmummyofwooooos · 08/02/2018 20:29

He sounds like a massive arse, and if hes the kind of person to sleep around despite being married- his life is already set to crumble around him.
It may seem like a quick fix, but after all he did to you, you dont need to let this person have control over your body.
Also, do you really want your name dirtied and dragged into it? You need to remind yourself that you are better than that.
Perhaps some councilling may help you with your feelings- sincerely hoping you can find the strength and will to rise above it. You are deffinately worth more than you think you are, and he will get his come- uppance another way, that dosent have to drag you down too.

Armygirl · 08/02/2018 20:29

He drugged and raped you as a teenager and you are considering having sex with him?? Why on Earth would you!

Original poster
SwanVests · 08/02/2018 20:34

My name is already dragged into it. I did the stupid thing and reported him to the police - his SHL found that I had depression and as such am incapable of being raped. So it didn’t go to trial. But everyone I know knows about it and believed him. I’ve moved away, started again but then I get a message from him.

I just want people to know I’m not some crazy fantasist and unless I meet him I can’t do that.

OP posts:
Huntinginthedark · 08/02/2018 20:35

How is he back in contact with you?
You’re torturing yourself. And it will not make you feel better

More likely you won’t be believed, and even if you are the likelihood of his wife leaving him is pretty slim.

People who have genuinely wanted to have sex with someone who’s married often then get blamed and vilified and there are very few consequences for the husband. Wife sticks by husband, woman he fucked is some crazy Bitch. Even if you showed her a video tape it’s not necessarily going to ruin his life

If that ends up being the scenario will you feel EVEN worse ?
Because even if I wanted the revenge, it almost always backfires.

The best thing you can do is get him as far away from your life as you can.

Have you had therapy for PTSD? rather than standard therapy

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