Brave Babes Battle Bus: Next Stop Fabulous February

[SweetLathyrus]

Hi, I'm SweetLathyrus, Sweet for short, and I've been on and off Gerald the Brave Babes Battle Bus since 2014. Over the years, lots of us have maintained the thread, most of all the lovely Mouse, who has been here since the early days, and still scurries onboard when she can.

The bus is a place of support, safety and occasional silliness for those of us struggling with our relationship with alcohol. Some of us are sober, some are trying to be, some are moderating and aren't ready to give up alcohol just yet.

So whatever your reason for questioning the whys and WTFs of your drinking, hop on board, make yourselves comfortable and join in. Driers and Triers, all welcome.

2018 has been a busy year so far, lots of new travellers as well as old faces; if you want to read back on the journey through Dry or Dryer January so far, here's the link to the last thread

And in case you want to know how it all started, here is the link to JWN's original, inspiring thread.

Join us on our journey, you won't regret it.

Hi all.
Day 17 done here, am in bed.
DH is halfway down his 2nd bottle of wine. Says a lot about our relationship - I feel much more in control when I’m not drinking and he is, I am clear headed, can remember conversations, and know I won’t agree to anything I don’t want to. AF is good!

Morning all. Day 8 for me. I'm not giving up but I'm cutting down and trying to moderate when I'm out

Day 26. No desire to drink. I feel like my mindset has changed and my drinking days are behind me. But there is still this underlying wariness that alcohol is just waiting around the corner. ....
Saw the MN Claire Pooley interview (thanks to the person who posted the link). She said something that resonated along the lines of - we all have a lifetime quota of booze and I've already had mine.

Happy Friday everyone!

Day 32 dawns along with another fecking sinus infection.
I'll be glad when Spring is here . It's cold and miserable today. A tropical -1.

Afternoon, finally caught up with myself.

Day 26, it is definitely getting easier, DH and I went out for lunch, roaring fire, good food, a lime and soda, beer for DH, and a bill that was about 2/3 what we would usually spend. What's more, I didn't feel I was missing out at all.

Mint, such cute wee hagis . Sinus infections are awful, every cold I get ends in one, and they were also the worst symptom for me at the beginning of the month. As it's so balmy up your way, I presume it's on with the shorts and flip flops !!

*Flowers, I think I had my lifetime supply just over December it's crazy, isn't it, here we are, feeling better (mostly), knowing it's better for us not to drink, but there is still a little voice in my head that is just saying "What, really, NEVER again?"

Glad things have quietened down sweet

I have had to throw a complete arsehole student off a course this week and he hasn't taken it well. So that has been rather stressful.

I have just got back from Tesco with more diet lemon and lime and NO BOOZE.

My grocery bills are a lot less than they used to be. I might have a tot up at the end of the month and compare with a "normal" month like October.

Rothbury, if your place is anything like ours, it will have taken an awful lot to have got to that point, and they can be vicious, we all seem to live in fear of them.

I find we are spending less because I'm not going shopping mid-week most days for extra wine, so there's not the "Oh I just fancy that" extras in the basket either.

Thanks sweet The student is a middle aged man but I suspect nobody has ever really stood up to him before and told him he isn't as bloody important as he thinks he is. Pompous wanker
He has found out that the level of his course won't entitle him to membership of the Professional Body he wants to belong to, but the level of the course has never been a secret, he just assumed it was higher......

He has gone quite hysterical actually which is fairly amusing. My boss usually has my back so not too worried but yes, there will be an Inquest

More importantly, it hasn't led to drinking so I can get through a work crisis without using alcohol as a crutch - YAY!!!

Sorry - should have explained - he wanted me to foot the bill to fund his course at the higher level . Started shit stirring with everyone else on course, couldn't be resolved. His lecturers were starting to dread having him in the room as he was such a git, so he's gone.

SweetLathyrus
Aye

If he's not smart enough to read the course information, Rothbury, he's not smart enough to do the higher qualification Glad your boss has your back.

Mint one of my neighbours is from Dundee, he has worn flipflops all winter, being down south must be terribly uncomfortable for him .

I'm doing my Sarah Raven plant order now, - blowing all my wine savings and dreaming of Spring.

checking after a 5 hour training course on our CRM System. Give me strength. Things coming dangerously close to a head with dh but it's DS's birthday on Sunday and don't want it to happen before then.

Ma that's a lot of concentrating, excuse for an early night to stay out of DHs way.

Hi all I hope everyone is doing ok Aaargh I just had TV on and a programme just started called The Wine Show, what a stupid programme to show in January that channel got changed pretty sharpish!
I've discovered another nice af drink - Rocks orange mixed with sparkling water it's really lovely and refreshing. Have a nice evening and enjoy the clear heads tomorrow.

Trying Argh!

Well, only five days left of January, I intend to carry on AF, ODaaT for as long as I can.

It has been sunny and almost spring-like here in NW England today Sweet - the wild garlic has started to emerge in our local woods. Was walking there with the dogs this afternoon and had a phone call from an employment agency who'd seen my cv online wanting to know if I was interested in a permanent job. Walking in a sunny woodland on a Friday afternoon with my lovely doggies, having decided I'd had enough for today ....think I'll stick with the freelancing for now thanks . Don't get me wrong I've had a couple of 5 am starts this week too, but it's sooo nice to feel in control.

Rothbury - student sounds like a right knob. Reminds me why I never fancied teaching. Used to be in HE as a researcher (postdoc for ages and a few years as a fellow), but never quite made it to a permanent post....probably because I never fancied teaching

ma good luck with keeping a lid on it until after your DC's birthday. Sounds tough. I just googled CRM - now I learnt something

trying I flicked past The Wine Show quickly too - DO NOT need to see people savouring and making appreciative noises no matter how resolved I'm feeling!

Off to pick up big sis (when I say 'big' I mean 'older', she's about half my size ) from the station shortly. She's visiting for the weekend and is a bit of a drinker too. She knows I'm doing DJ though and that DH says he's packed it in, and she's not the sort to make it difficult. Really looking forward to seeing her.

Nice ego boost though, Flowers. Teaching is great, but only if you love it, otherwise it's a slog; I'd teach as many lectures as they wanted if someone else could do the marking!

It was lovely down here too, though SweetDog had to be carried to the bath wrapped in a towel he was so muddy. Enjoy your visitor

Flowers It must be nice to be wanted! I wish somewhere local would offer me a job! I'm sick of the commute to mine. I want to try going locum but I'm scared in case I can't get the work or can't find the building

Ma It all sounds stressful. What have you got planned for DS?

Rothbury At least he's gone now and you haven't drunk. I couldn't be a teacher. Don't know how you and Sweet do it. The workload sounds awful.

I am on day 26 today. I went for a long walk on the beach earlier. As Flowers said it felt quite spring like. Very bright and sunny. It was good. I resorted to Becks Blue last night. Strangely I drank them as fast as I'd drink lager even though the weren't getting me drunk. Not sure if I like the idea of them or not. It kind of irritated me that they tasted like lager but didn't have the effect. They made me want to smoke too. I didn't but I think I might be better sticking to juice.

Hello all
I very nearly caved earlier on the way home from work and bought some wine. Was doing the whole "I'll only have a glass" rubbish and convincing myself it would be fine
It never ends up being just one and I just can't stop and end up hating myself.
I didn't get any, thankfully and am sitting drinking ginger beer and lime, it's lovely! I just thought of the anxiety/hangover etc and decided it wasn't worth it. Was the strongest craving I've had in almost a month!
Dh is having a beer and I'm not remotely bothered now. Strange how the mind works, eh?
Have a lovely weekend everyone!

Morning, day 19 dawns here.
Woke at 5.45 as there was a warthog snoring beside me, got up and am now snuggled with the dog on the sofa. Nothing much planned, but today, I will not drink.

Morning all,
I got through a burns night ish dinner with my mum ok. DH was drinking sherry then whisky then wine. I had a moment of thinking that a glass here and there really would be fine. I reminded myself that I’d don’t actually seem to be able to do that, and it would turn into two glasses every night, more on weekends, which is enough to make me feel awful during the day. Or a bit fuzzy.

I’m feeling a lot more competent and confident which I wasn’t expecting. I’m also not needing to leave myself a margin of hangover free. I mean I can comit myself to making an elaborate meal/having a demanding child for a play date/book lots of work in because I know I won’t be having a slightly ‘off’ (hungover) day.

I might try and write all this down somewhere.

Should have said today is my day 26.

Morning All.

Baking I couldn't do 'proper' teaching, teenagers are grim and little ones, just too damn noisy and smelly . But I love working with undergrads, even though some of them drive me mad. The workloads, are stupid and getting worse, I can't see myself still doing this in ten years time, and certainly not until I'm 68, but I'm not sure what else I can do.

Dragon, you'll be able to take pleasure in DH's hangover - that is a toxic mix . Well done for resisting, you to, Olive, that voice that says we'll just have the one is so seductive, it's WW trying to weave a spell of delusion and intoxication.

Slings sounds like a pyjama and dog snuggle day

I haven't had the 'boing' that I remember from other AF periods, but then I don't think work has given me space to feel it. I do, however, feel calm, and capable, just getting on with stuff. Long may it continue . . . and the thing is, it's entirely in my control.

rothbury and ohdear go you on not buying wine. rothbury that work situation sounds stressful and that student sounds like a bully .

I'm day 85 af! I'm going to get the coil removed. Works been very stressful this week but now I am not hormonal I'm not a complete state Which is good.

I am thinking about wine much less. I have got things I need to change (the reasons my drinking got so out of hand) but things feel more achievable.

WARNING TRIGGER WARNING BELOW

I can see day 100 around the corner! I need to think of a treat for myself. I've not seen any of the money as everything has been so tight (one thing breaking after another at the moment) but I must mark 100 days.

Since starting drinking in my teens I have never been able to drink like my friends- never had an off switch. Drinking at home alone as a student and as life stresses ramped up wine became more essential. Even sexual assault when drunk was not enough to make me stop. Just made me drink more to forget. Stopping drinking has made me realise I actually never had sober sex it was always too triggering. I hope this is ok to put here. Really sorry if not.

Thank you all for this thread last year I tried and failed, tried and failed. But could always come back here.

I have 2 small children I need to keep things going for so I can't get complacent. So today I won't drink.