looks like it's over

[mylittlestar]

well after everything you will have seen so far, and my happiness at dh and i giving our marriage another go, sadly it doesn't look like that is possible anymore.

i've been feeling down the last couple of days and couldn't put my finger on it. thought it was probably a bit of paranoia. the pregnancy scare etc. but looking back dh had also become distant and withdrawn and i think i was picking up on that.

i checked his phone this morning. there was a message in his saved items to the ow. basically said of course i'll get up early to come and take you to work. i'll leave a bit early so we can have a little kiss before we set off...

confronted him. he swore he hadn't been back in touch. then has admitted that after his paranoia that i may have met someone on my work night out last week, he got back in touch with her.
don't really know much more than that and there's no point in asking as i'm not sure i could believe what he tells me anyway.

i had four main reasons for giving things another try. my love for him. the fact that anyone can make a mistake once. the fact that he swore he hated living a double life and would never want to live that way again. and finally, the fact that he said after seeing what he'd put me through, he'd never put me through that again.

just 4 weeks later he has.

to be honest i really don't want to turn this thread into a session to slag dh off. i don't understand his reasons and never will. but i do love him.

i think perhaps it's time to let my head rule my heart and make myself wake up to the fact that he doesn't love me in the same way i love him.

one day he'll realise what he's lost and what he's put me through. and i truly believe that nothing i say or do from this point on will have any impact. it's up to him now.

i've come into work to try and take my mind off it all and calm down. so i'm ok. i'm glad i have MN to get all of this out as this time i do not want one single person in RL to know. i don't want people getting at dh. i don't want people telling me 'i told you so'. i don't really want sympathy.
i'm sick of my life being one big drama after the next. i want to focus on me and ds and i want a happy quiet life filled with love and laughter. if the only way to get that is being alone with ds, then so be it. i'm truly blessed to have him.

so perhaps this thread should be about how i can now move forward without the love of my life and my soul mate....

MLS - . What a cow to think she could give you grief! I think she has got off lightly, although I don't condone what your sister did. She should have received a loit worse from you and you have been the essence of grace and dignity over the whole thing.

(((( mls)))) its good to get angry rather than bottle it up but rant your anger out on here not at dh.

The thing is bunny boilers are all nice and sweet and accomadating till they get p*ssed off then they turn nut jobs!

I think what your sister did was what any sister would have and i would be proud of her. I dont have a sister but i do have 3 very beautiful dd and i hope to god they never suffer this kind of pain but if one did id like to think the other 2 would be there to fight her corner.

yes mel I agree. he was having the time of his life, sex on tap, nights away with her... then had a short holiday with me to try and salvage his marriage and she takes an overdose....

unsure why at that point he didn't run a mile!

the sex must have been way too easy to get
or too good

sorry - you're all getting it today! iohw's technique means I'm distancing myself from dh and not contacting him as i usually would. so blame her that i'm ranting on here lol!!
iohw where are you anyway??

or it was just sex regardless MLS !

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Julie, I thought you said on another thread. The barman asked "Where's Julie?"

Er sorry, not stirring, really. slinks off

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Damn...

lol at you trying to guess her name...

it's not sarah... and Anniegetyourgun good guess but not julie either (whatever name I used was just made up)

you'd never guess her name in a million years... in fact you'd all be 'pmsl' literally if i told you!!!

good try though

i know it's

Mylittlestar

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It was just there. i think he got caught up he told one lie then another to cover first lie and it went from there till he was in such a hell of a mess he didnt know how to get out of it. Im not sticking up for him in anyway dont think i am.

But as i have said before men are pathetic and women are very devious and very good at gettin what and who they want. Ow the little madam saw what you had and wanted it regardless of you or ds and your life and your feelings. She is niave but seems like she could be a devious little madam too with the overdosing and the pregnancy what an amazing effect guilt has on a person. Your dh has only himself to blame for putting himself in the middle and being pulled one way then another. But his priority is to you and ds now. As sad as it is she must now take care of herself and move on.dh must take care of you and ds.

Starting with putting a smile on your face today.Surely there must be a new bag or pair of shoes that you just have to have? on his credit card of course! lol

it's not very similar to someone else's is it?

gertrude?

ugly betty?

someone on msn ? yours ?

thanks mel

he did put himself in the middle, at a difficult time in his life. and then he was torn between that psycho, with her threats and guilt trips, and his wife who was giving him all the love in the world, despite everything. like you say he got deeper and deeper, as each lie had to cover the last one, and in the end was so scared of me finding out, and so scared of her doing something daft or spilling the beans, that he just wanted to run away from everything.

whilst still sh*gging the two of us of course

you're really making me laugh with the name thing

'star' was a great guess! it's a name that would absolutely not be associated with a devious spiteful bitch, put it that way!!

i will tell you on msn later if you want... as long as you promise not to kill her!!

twinkle ?

angel?

very close!

no matter what is going on in amans life they always semm to be able to stand to attention ready for action!!! My dh is sick as a dog in bed right now but still gagging for it!! lol.

angelica

just found out off sis what she actually sent to her... tbh it's not that bad and i really don't think ow had any justification for ranting and raving at me and dh (not that she would have had justification even if it was horrendous - she deserved it!)

basically, sis flipped because ow's myspace had all this stuff about having her heart broken by a married man, and all these comments to her 'friends' about how the sex was better with older men, how she was devastated and so upset... you can imagine...

anyway, here's what sis said:

"Oh hello, you little homewrecker.

Let me just say something, because i'd rather do that here than find you and be tempted to smack you... you've had your "heart broken"?! What about my f*ing sister you stupid bitch.

She didnt deserve what you've done to her. Your a selfish conceited , who's not only jeprodised the happiness of my sister but of my nephew too. You must be so proud.

And how fing dare you talk about it with people on myspace, as if your some kind of victim! you fing tool.

Your disgusting. "

Fair enough I'd say??