Anyone quite happy to not be in a relationship?

[BigbreastsBiggerbeard]

Anyone else feel that they're quite content to not be in a relationship, and actually enjoy not having to make all the compromises having a partner brings?

Just the thought of entering another relationship these days is enough to make me come over all exhausted and need a long lie down with a good podcast

I think one problem is that women are no longer appreciated, for want of a better word. Its a bit of an old fashioned term for something thats hard to describe , but hey-ho, thats the truth as I see it. If you're just a domestic worker or just a financial partner for a joint mortgage or [whatever] I don't really see the point, for the woman tbh. The level of disrespect on Relationships for women is stratospheric (e.g. using prostitutes, gambling joint finances away) is enough to send anyone to a nice single room with a cat for company.

Petal stretch the last bit of your post make me smile and I think you are right by the way.

I'm more than 'quite happy', I genuinely feel lucky that I don't have any need for a man in my life. I was out with some friends last night one of whom, like me, is a single parent and she's just so miserable without a man, posting sad memes on FB etc. I cannot relate at all and feel sad for her and women like her who cannot enjoy their own company. Been single a long time and much prefer it to being in a relationship. I can safely say I have no intention of ever sharing my home with a romantic partner. I have however been told no less than twice this week alone that 'i just need a man now' No really, I don't. A man is the last thing I need! And one of the women who said it is in an abusive relationship, there are actually women out there who would rather have a violent partner than no partner, blows my mind.

I dunno petal I can see where you are coming from but my last relationship was with a woman. I felt appreciated, on an even standing and we both mucked in equally with things that needed done. So for me it wasn't that.

I think in my case I have dc, they take up the majority of my time. Add in a relationship and there is barely any time for myself. I'm an introvert and it makes me feel exhausted and smothered.

I simply have no need for anyone else and have got used over the last 7 years to provide for myself and be selfish to a certain extent with my time and what I want to do.

hello OP, I've been around the block many a time. Whilst I haven't actually shut up shop so to speak, I did end a couple of dalliances last year as I needed some breathing space. As a now empty nester, I have the house to myself for the first time in decades.
Tonight I have T2 and Ab fab movies, dog, real fire. I have a specially selected wine and good cheeses/chocolates and I may experiment with my new eyeshadow set. I also have nice underwear on today, for me. I do wonder where a man would actually fit in here - is it a bit rude to tell them to leave in between starting T2 and Ab fab?

cheers likelylass sounds like my kind of Saturday!

(clinks large wine glasses with NellMangel)
Cheers!

here too, although I am feeling a bit lonely tonight. Don't want a partner but just a mate to chat to. They all off in the land of Saturday night coupledom however. Book may call me soon.

I just don't feel at a loose end enough to want/need a partner. Ds still keeps me busy enough at the age of 12 and the spare time I do have is for me. I would resent having to give it up for somebody else.

If I was completely on my own I would just get a dog. Much better company in my view!

I don't mind the initial excitement of the start of the relationship, but it quickly palls for me. Even then, though, I often resent having to make the effort. So, yes, from now on it's me, a very dusty home and hairy legs. It's the way forward, I tell you

I have been genuinely happily single for a while. I get up early every day as have various animals that need attending to, and I was just thinking in the bath this morning, how much I would have to change my routine if I had someone living here. I like to get up, potter about, in and out of the bathroom at my leisure, check news/weather etc on iPad and maybe read a few bits if they take my fancy. All of this from about 5.30 or 6am at the latest.

I've always been an early riser and would hate to think I had to consider someone else ! Selfish? Maybe. I guess I could try for a relationship where we didn't live together, but I really like the fact I can please myself. Go out when I want (or not ) arrange various vet visits without having to work around anyone else and no one to care if I'm late home as I decide to to last minute jobs whilst out.

More than happy with my lot at the moment !

OlympicBonfire - that sounds very relaxed. Not selfish at all - it's only selfish if you actually have someone else to consider. If you're on your own you can please yourself. And gosh, it's wonderful....

Sharing holidays would be nice, a bit of interesting conversation and cuddles. But all the relationships I've had, they've never lived up to what I wanted them to be. I'm not putting effort into meeting someone. I'm not panicked about it although I do worry about the being old and going through things like parents dying without some close adult support. The sex thing is what keeps me from hunting for a relationship actually. I used to be very, very into it but as soon as I had a baby, it 99% killed any interest in the subject! I do find being a single parent shuts you out of a lot of the socialising circles though.

I love my husband very much, and cherish our life together. But he is the last man I will live with. If we were to split up or he were to die I wouldn't want another relationship. I was single for 6 years before I met him and I loved it. I have great friends for all the good adult company and needs and my children for unconditional love.

You have to strike it incredibly lucky to find a partner with whom living/sharing your life is a smooth sailing and doesn't involve those dreaded compromises and headaches. So yes, living alone is often a better choice. When you have total control over every aspect of your life and time, that's the closest you come to freedom.
If you are happier with someone though than being single, then go for that.

Loved reading this thread.

I thought it was just me..... as once again this weekend someone said to me.... 'time for a new man'. No, it isn't and I don't want one, thanks very much! She then said that I will grow old lonely and with a house full of cats. I was a bit offended really, why can people not see that having a man around, isn't the bloody bee all and end all. Grrrr

I could think of nothing worse right now, I like sleeping alone, I like eating what I want, when I want, I enjoy doing spur of the moment things with the dc without having to check first if there are any other plans that were made, I love vegging out on the couch if I bloody well feel like it. I like the fact that I can leave the dishes for a day if I want to, I like the fact that I can blast the music I LIKE while I'm cooking (the food I want) to, I like that if I don't feel like shaving then I don't, want to wear my fat pants, then I can. And NO SNORING. Has to be the best of the lot. I have never in my 20 years of marriage slept as well as I do now. I look better, I feel better. I know that if something breaks in the house, I can fix it (most of the time). I don't have to ask anybody to do anything, which then gets spat back at you for nagging, no arguments, no stress. At this point in time, it is not likely that I will enter into another relationship.

Thinking about it seriously, I don't even miss sex. I have had a moment or two when a nice meaningful hug might have been nice, but a good gulp of wine (or a bottle if I feel like it) was a good substitute.

I don't get why everyone seems to think that having a partner is so up there. Had a do at my house with weekend, all of my friends are married or with long term partners. All they did was moan and bitch the whole night. There I was thinking to myself... thank fuck, I don't have that, don't miss it at all.

Scrabble I have another friend like that too. She is still with her husband, although he is in the midst of a five year affair which she knows about. But she cannot chuck him out. He has manipulated her so badly their whole marriage that he has made her believe she cannot live without him around.

But, she decided that she would do a tit for tat and signed up for every dating site going. When I asked her why, she replied that she isn't like me, (?) and NEEDS someone if her life, even if its a fake profile person chatting to her (and sending flipping masturbating videos over messaging etc). Sigh. She needs the attention all of the time. It is not going to end well, as if she is here and someone has not replied to her within an hour, she gets all moody and upset. Its mindset I think, she cannot see past what her husband has always told her. Quite sad really. I worry for her.

I too have a friend that flits from one to the next. Madly in love within weeks then when it all goes wrong a short time later cue the depressed posts on fb. Barely blink before she's truly deeply with someone else. Sometimes it's a bit like watching a car crash and I feel sad for her that she only seems to think highly of herself when she has that validation of a relationship. Gives her heart away far too easily.

The only thing that does worry me is possibly regretting being alone when I get older. I've seen it with one of my parent's friends lately. She has always been by herself and now her child has finally flown the nest she is very depressed by herself, drinking far too much and dealing with the stresses of aging parents herself with no-one to support her.

Absolutely!! I love being single, plus I have a five year old and I don't want him to experience people coming and going from my life in that way.

In the future I can see that a bit of dating and flirting could be fun but I seriously doubt I'll "settle down" now.

I'd rather be single after reading some replies on here of how low the bar is set.

I don't mean on this thread I meant in General terms

Yes, me! I've been single for the last 2 years a LOVE it! I love having my own house, just me, the kids and the dog. It's so relaxed and stress free. I can do what I like without consulting anyone. I don't have to put up with moods or some grumpy middle aged man moaning and complaining about stupid little things. I can leave al the lights on and have the central heating on tropical with no complaints! I get the whole bed to myself and don't get disturbed by snoring.

I can't imagine ever living with a man again tbh.

We should share this thread with all the people who are in awful relationship but worrying about being on their own.

Can I say thank you for this thread. Have just finished a 20 year relationship and needed some positive stories about being in my own! Dp on the other hand is desperate to be with someone and is already on dating sites

I've had a "traditional" relationship, living together, kids, the works.

Lasted a reasonable length of time, and i was happy for the majority of it. I've had a few relationships since, but nothing that's been comparable and frankly I'd rather be with no-one than be with the wrong one.

Subsequently I'm quite happy to be single and enjoy my time with my kids, and have casual dating as and when the opportunities arise.

I'm certainly open to the idea of another long term committed relationship, but I set the bar quite high and I'm an ugly fucker so I expect I'll enjoy being single indefinitely :D

pleasestopsnoring - well, you'll be able to change your username for a start!

For me it's getting to know myself all over again. Total self-indulgence (out of work hours anyway), doing what I want when I want. Like making a pile of banana pancakes on a Saturday morning & eating them in bed with a pot of coffee & a good book. Or having friends round for lunch with 24 hours notice because we realise we're all free & it would be fun. Or decorating my flat completely to my tastes, including the sense of satisfaction when I find exactly the thing I was looking for.