The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Braving The Wine Witch & Her Alcohol Free Autumn

[Mouseface]

Hello

I’m Mouse one of the Brave Babes who ride on this wonderful Bus, called Gerald, along with all the Opal Fruits wrappers and of course Barry The squid.

We all have a wise variety of life experiences and experiences with alcohol too. We’re not admirers of hang overs and we certainly don’t do judgey pants!

We’re here to ride along with you, when life is pants but also when it’s not as well and you my want to celebrate that bit too much!

So find a seat and come take a ride. I’ll link the previous and also the very first link and the reason we’re all here.

*Mouse

I didn't. But I will now! Thank you

Things have got even shittier since I last posted. I am in hospital right now as I refractured my elbow. I was told to come in at 7am yesterday, nil by mouth etc. At 2pm I got told that they wouldn’t be able to do my op because they had had too many emergencies to deal with but they encouraged me to stay overnight as, the longer I’m here, the more of a priority I become.
So this morning I was all set, gowned up, surgical stockings on etc and told that I was 2nd on the list. Saw the anaesthetist etc.
Then at 9.30am, I was told that it wasn’t going to happen today because they need a specialist doctor who isn’t available today.
So I’m still here.
‘D’H has surpassed himself with his unreasonable behaviour over the last week to the point that I have needed to involve the Police to be able to access the home that I own half of - not to move in but literally just to be given a key so I can go in and pick some things up.
I will read everyone’s posts later and give a more detailed update later - I just haven’t felt up to it over the last few days.
I just feel so lonely. I really think H has poisoned the DC against me.
He does have some genuine reasons to be angry with me and I would happily take that on the chin but he seems to just utterly hate and despise me and some of his recent behaviour has been downright sadistic.
I just miss the children. It feels like I’m being airbrushed out of existence.
There is more to me than just being an alcoholic. There are things I have done that I’m not proud of but I’m not a bad person.
I have put so much love and time into those children and it feels like it has all counted for nothing.
It frightens me how my life has completely fallen apart in the space of a few months.
I am just so lonely.

MsHooliesCardigan the more I read about this H of yours the more I get the rage.

He doesn't have to like any of this, he doesn't even have to be supportive of you (I suppose). But by god he has to help his children navigate their relationship with their mum. Not just brutally pull the plug.

I am so so sorry

There is more to me than just being an alcoholic

Yes there is MrsHoolies. And those of us who have got to know you on here realise that. As do your family - including your DCs. They are being manipulated by a nasty man. Addiction is an illness. It is not who you are. You will get better and piece things back together. Do not let him derail you. I am so cross for you. Actually bloody furious. For you and your kids because he's not helping them either. I hope you have someone to talk to IRL as well as on here. But we are always here for you. Much love

Looking Thank you, you don’t know how much that means to me right now. I feel like I am literally hanging on by a thread.. i will fight this with every breath in my body. Thank you to all of you who have offered support. I will beat this

Hi again. Still in a mess with my not-quite-ex.

Keep hoping for a miracle but having to face the fact that he's set on making me the fall-guy and refusing to accept that we BOTH need to deal with our demons.

Still in the fizz, sadly but one thing at a time. At least my mollycoddled, entitled, pandered kids are safe and un-stressed x

Bah humbug.

Had a shit day. Had a shit week. Car died, phone died. DH didn't speak to me for 3 days for no real reason at all.

Tonight, had my fill of shit. Bought kids tea from McDonald's as a treat after car broke down and it took me 3 hours to get home from work. Have drunk a bottle of wine and had it out with DH.

So, I'm not perfect. I think I sound like a sanctimonious twat on here sometimes. Can't post on dead phone so no grin!

Learning so...

mshoolies so glad to see you back. I've worried about you. Please keep posting. You need to keep on keeping on, no matter what

ginger you can only be responsible for yourself, lead by example and be marvellous!

If I have to pick a good thing - and I think we all should no matter how shit things are - my eyes look less yellow!

ginger Hang on in there
I was thinking last night what a lovely bunch we are on here.
There is so much stigma about alcohol/substance misuse - so many people see it as some character defect/weakness/ lack of willpower etc when it’s just not that simple. There is a large body of evidence that there is a strong genetic predisposition to alcoholism. That isn’t to say that the individual has no responsibility but that some people are at higher risk of developing problems than others.
I briefly worked in eating disorders and there is a a lot of research emerging that anorexia has a strong genetic component.
Nobody with any compassion would tell an anorexic that they should just eat and don’t they know that there are people starving to death in Africa but there are plenty of people who think that people with drug or alcohol problems are scum and that they ‘just’ need to stop.

Morning all, think it’s about time I hauled my large arse out of the sidecar. I haven’t read back so hope that everyone is well and happy.

Plonks herself down next to misshoolies, gives her a big hug and then starts moaning about the state poor Gerald has been kept in.

Tut. Tut. Tut.
X

Hello everybabe,
misshoolies you are a quite remarkable person for staying so strong in the face of so much difficulty, I can't imagine how tough things are for you. I suppose your husband has been through the mill a bit but he sounds very cruel and obstructive (you say yourself he has genuine reasons to be angry and I guess he has but...)
Would it help to write down all your thoughts and feelings in some kind of journal, I find it marvellous for clarity of thought.

I am sorry once more that there are a lot of stressed and sad people here, I don't feel right posting when I am Snow Whiting

The house is chock full of bottles for Christmas guests, I haven't touched any of that, but continue to have a beer here and there, actually it is creeping up a bit so I really have to be careful and I'm looking forward to another Dry January to get back in the swing tbh.

Nearly a year since I first posted - one champagne binge in that time (if your'e gonna do it might as well do it in style eh?!)
So much change in that year, mostly for the best - I sense more change to come, this has been a 'laying foundations' year.

Lots of love to everyone, stay safe in the storms and snow (none here yet) and keep busy, keep hydrated (I know, I always say it but it's so important in keeping the cravings at bay)

Hugs and Opal Fruits all round

It's me, checking in to say I'm still bumbling around the back of the bus. Things have been pretty crap, I cannot wait for this goddamn season of good cheer (sic) to end. At least it's not snowing, oh, wait...
I'll catch up properly later.

Hey all. Crap end of week for me too. Boiler still bust, no hot water or heating. Got home exhausted after a week of covering several hundred miles, probably more, using every conceivable mode of transport in all weathers. One 5am start and two overnights and late finishes. Two hour drive home tonight which should have been 45 mins due to roadworks. Dh is watching football. Tells me I need to go back out and pick up ds s he cant go because he's had a few beers! I refused to go. He stormed out complaining about people not helping. I then found the remains of Wednesdays dinner still in the oven because I havent been home since then and he is too fucking lazy to keep on top of things while Im working every hour God sends!
At the dinner last night my photo was shown on the big screens and I was mentioned by name by a very senior speaker to thank me for my work with Veterans and got a round of applause from several hundred people. I was so proud. He hasnt even asked me how it went........ I phoned him from the train today and he said he couldnt talk and would call back in 20 minutes. He did call back.Said he couldnt talk before as his football team manager was giving a press conference....what had I phoned for? I said, nothing, it doesnt matter.

Oh ma
New year coming, fresh start?

I'm working on it lux. I now have my own bank account for the first time since we were married. That's a big step.

It is a big step ma I'd love for you to be snow whiting too x

Hey ma xxxx

Hey guggs xxx

Hey Lux and Spanna and Hope and Mint and Margie and Joey and everyone else.

Hey Isinde and venus and mouse

ma good for you. Another step in the right direction, YOUR direction.

faire good to see you! Are you still up oon the roofrack?. Wanna see my triangle?

mint I'm sorry your having a crap time I hope it improves for you.

ma congratulations for your hard work im pleased your work acknowledged. I'm sorry your dh didn't even ask about it...

Mshoolies you are so right about stigma I would prefer to tell people I have mental health problems rather than I am an alcoholic.

Day 36 af. Have been unwell for the whole of it. Coming to the end of tonsilitis now too. Felt very fed up and tearful about it. The reasons pushing me to drink have left my immune system very low it's just frustrating that I have so far not got to feel ok or good af. Was so close yesterday to giving up as what's the point when I feel like this.

Anyway keeping going. Watching dh drink 2 bottles of wine helped to remember why I don't want to.

Hope you all have good days x

Morning all !
Day 150 something for me.
Dont give up Say
It took me a while to feel "well" and AF doesnt mean you wont get all the usual virussy crap going around.
Interesting discussion Ms
I feel that being overweight is far more stigmatised and that alcohol misuse is celebrated in our society.
Certainly noone has used the word "alcoholic" in my friendship group but most drink way too much ( triple what I did) and its all under the guise of Prosseco time and Gin o 'clock .
I think the tendency is to minimise and as you say stigmatise those who have the courage to say they have a problem.
Feeling tired but happily spending my evenings crafting and whoo hoo The Crown is back !!
Have been working my way through the flavoured tonic waters -Fentimans Orange is winning atm
Not long until Dry January and we are on trend

Hi everyone. Brand new to MN. I only joined in the hope of getting a seat on the bus, I've had enough and it looks like a great place to start.

welcome grotbags. Always room for another one.

Thank you. Having my first Saturday night off in ages. Only because (when I was hungover this morning) I told my husband I'd pick him up from his Christmas drinks. Been regretting that since I felt better at 4.00!

Welcome Grotbags just join right on in.

I'm starting another bloody cold 😯 hate this weather.

Going to watch the end of strictly and go to bed. Hope everyone else is OK.

Welcome Grobags Make yourself at home. I’m very much in the sidecar at the moment but hoping to get out of here soon and get back on the bus.
Whether you’re 3,years sober on 4 bottles of vodka a day, we welcome you x