Does my friend fancy my DH?

[shelle07]

This has been driving me nuts. I think my married friend fancies my husband. First it started that she instigated they share lifts to our children's rugby matches, then at Christmas we all had a few wines and she was sat up closed she to him on the couch, virtually on top of him, chatting away sharing private jokes. It wound me up a treat. We walked them home (her and her DH) as it was a nice eve, and when we all said goodby she "accidentally" kissed my DH on the lips. My son saw it and confronted my DH on the walk back.
The final straw was when I saw our mobile phone bills - DH's was unusually more than normal, and on one eve they exchanged 37 texts. As it transpires, the following month he had arranged a surprise birthday party for me and she had been helping him to arrange it, hence the surge in texts.
She used to invite herself round, and in one occasion when DH was watching the football, kept finding excuses to sit with him and join him, and wouldn't leave - even when my DH told her that he didn't want to keep her from catching up with me!
My DH swears there is nothing in it on his part, he sees her only as a friend and wife of his mate, and he has totally backed off. However, whenever I think things have calmed down I find my suspicions rising again. A couple of weeks ago she called by when my DH was working from home and he said he couldn't get rid of her, despite lots of hints. She knew I was at work.
I see her running past our house (she lives at the other side of the village) and driving by a lot. I feel like she's often checking to see who is home.
I possibly wouldn't feel this way if it wasn't for her ignoring me in public of late and avoiding me. Her behaviour is just so weird. Yet when my DH is around she is jovial and upbeat.
Am I being paranoid?

I think your DH should be blunt with her. He should say to her that he finds her behaviour towards him not appropriate x

My DH wasnt blunt last year with an assistant of ours who was a bit keen on overcommunicating tittle tittle at all times and he ended up hiding it from
Me as he was embarrassed and it then blew up when I realised he was deleting and hiding , although I do know it was all crap as I was tracking unbeknown to him, not proud of that but it did make me think why the hell do guys do this rather than just tell someone to give it a rest

Be very wary. I can think of two relationships right off the top of my head which involved so called female friends who stole husbands right from under the nose of their wives. They come around supposedly socialising and being all normal,caring and friendly to your face when secretly they have designs on your partner. They beguile them slowly but surely and then one day they make their move. It usually involves some impromptu physical touch or suggestion and before you know it,,well,,men can be weak...i know its no excuse but if the circumstances algin, they can bed another woman just out of pure sexual desire and then all is lost.

Seen it happen twice that i can think of.

Trouble is of course that if you raise it and put your kitten heel down, you will be seen as mad, paranoid and the wrong one.

HE has responsibilities too. I would advise keeping schtum but observe and gather evidence discretely,make plans and then if /when you find he has been fucking her, dump him and clean him out.

It does sound like she's got designs on your DH. I would demand that he cease contact with her also. And tell him to block her number on his phone.

Are you sure there's nothing going on? Sorry to ask.

Abiut 6 months ago my friend crossed a line with my boyfriend and I dropped her immediately.

A couple of months after that I got a text from her to say she had lost her job and then not long after that she broke her back. I still haven't spoken to her. She can fuck right off.

Get rid of her, she is no friend.

I had a childhood "friend" who was all over my then bf one night out. I told her over coffee at a later date I was uncomfortable with it and I'd prefer she didn't. Then she did it again on the next night out! Stroking his chest and everything. I haven't spoken to her since. I suggest you do the same x

@Myheartbelongsto

I like your style.

female friends who stole husbands right from under the nose of their wives.

Point of information: You can't "steal" a person. Humans (including husbands) are autonomous beings who make a voluntary choice who to be with. There is no property in a person.

You can be alert to situations that might increase the chances of a person developing an inappropriate relationship and it sounds OP as if your friend is trying to create those situations.

I think you need to address it.

Myheartbelongsto....err..yes,,quite right.
Pink Tiger.. you know what i mean ..

he said he couldn't get rid of her, despite lots of hints.

I think your husband is secretly enjoying the attention - otherwise he would have made it VERY clear by now that she's bang out of order.
Why did he even let her in the house?

If he thinks all this is 'funny' just wait until she makes a false accusation of sexual assault against him.......see how 'funny' and 'harmless' he finds her then!

You need to be very blunt with her - both of you.
Ideally with your husband in the room, so when she looks to him for support over your 'paranoia' he can very clearly tell her "i agree with my wife".

If he says anything to her when it's just the two of them there's a high chance she will make a false accusation against him out of spite and hurt pride.