Sexual harassment uncovered a bigger problem

[StupidSlimyGit]

I had a thread in AIBU about sexual harassment at my work place asking for advice on whether I should take it further and how to do so. The advice I got was amazing and the issue is resolved but, in the investigations it has emerged that my DP has been cheating on me with one of the cleaners where we both work. He has told people we are in an open relationship (we are not and have never discussed one) advised people to send me sexual messages. Original thread is here if anyone wants to read it.

I have a 7 month old baby and I'm still on maternity leave. We have been together for around 4 years. I got with him after I managed to leave a (physically and mentally) abusive relationship. I've got some health issues along with PTSD, anxiety, depression and personality disorder but I've been his carer since we got together because he has some serious MH issues himself.

He doesn't know I know, I'm shaking from head to foot and feel sick, just want to cry. My whole world feels like it has imploded. I can't leave right now, I'm very limited contact with my family who live on the other side of the country and the rest live abroad and don't have many friends because of my MH issues (find it difficult to go out meet people etc). I can't afford my home alone, and he is the only childcare I have for DD because I'm where I am. I cant not go back to work because then i owe them hundreds of pounds in enhanced maternity pay so I'm stuck for at least another 5 months.

Sorry this is rambly i don't really know what I'm asking. Hand holds maybe please?

Almost all the Freedom progs I know have a crèche or similar. I don't think it's the right place for children but they're usually in places similar to Children's Centres so there may be care.
Please ring the number and explain you have a DD and ask their advice. It's only a couple of hours at a time - could you leave her with your friend?

You will be ok. I've been through similar very recently.

Think of it like a rollercoaster - you will go up some days and down on others but you are ALWAYS moving forward. That helped me.

We are here for you.

Thankyou for the support. I didn't think it would be a suitable place for kids, the only reason I thought it might be ok is because she's too little to understand. If there's childcare there though that would be better. I'll phone on Monday when I've hopefully had some sleep to speak to them and ask about childcare while I'm there. Hopefully if there is some it won't be too expensive. I can't leave her with my friend because she is busy on weekdays and has her grandson who has ADHD and some other issues on weekends.

My landlord has given me permission to leave the tenancy if I give him 30 days notice and I've joined the council list bidding on properties. I'm apparently on a higher band because of DD and living with my ex but there's still lots of other people bidding.

I'll try to remember that rollercoaster quote teabag thank you.

Little one hasn't slept well the last few nights and I think that's just making everything worse. Feel completely on my knees. Struggling to eat myself aswell which just makes being tired worse.

Tiny bit of good news though! DD is almost 8 months now, and has been a solid refuser consistently since she started weaning but has actually eaten some solids the last week and a bit including happily munching an entire rusk and a pot of homemade mango puree. Not ideal foods but it's something!

How's things, OP?

Also checking in to see how you and your daughter are doing and getting on OP?

Did you manage to speak about the freedom programme?