Ca you cheat on somebody and still love them?

[Latenightthoughts]

Following on from a dinner I've just had with a male friend(purely platonic our mums have been best friends since we were born he's like a gross older brother to me) and DP was with us, this isn't some segue into hidden feelings.

He thinks yes. I'm not sure. Especially if you're talking more than once. He thinks that's too black and white and it's perfectly possible to love one person whilst having sex with another.
I left my ex DH as he had an affair. At the time people said I was being too cut and dried but I stand by my decision. I do sometimes wonder if I was being too simplistic though.

He should have stonewalled her. He should even have been rude to her. But he wasn't. He was entranced by her. He was flattered beyond belief. And he was also determined to show that he could have her if he wanted. It was a classic chase.

Later it didn't go so well - later he realised what he was losing and he became insanely jealous about me, listening devices, recording, tracking, crazy behaviour - after I told him ok cool do what you like, and I will too. He had depended on me being there and then he realised that in focusing on the one, he was losing the chicken he'd thought safely in the coop. Whoops.

He is abusive. That is why you describe him as 'my idiot'... this is not love of the century... it is just a crap relationship with an abusive cheater.

'And the person who I still sleep entwined with every night'

So he sleeps with another woman, behaves appallingly to you - and yet gets away with it because she somehow 'bewitched him', I MUST try that excuse next time I do something wrong....