Sigh, can't believe I'm doing this.

[user1482775337]

First things first, I'm an avid user of this site, had to use a different username to not let people know this is all from me,

Well, where do I begin,

I'm a male! I guess that is a good start,

Well, 2016 has been another year of being nice to the wrong people, not getting anywhere with any female, being used for my good heart (Something that my male friends all agree on) still being single and getting hurt and jealous by everybody I know, as I don't see anybody else with this problem I have.

I fail to see where I'm going wrong, I start the conversation, listen, give advice, ask various questions (Just about their day etc, nothing personal or sexual) which somehow ends up with me being blanked and never spoken to again..

I don't mind listening to other people's problems and advising and helping, as it takes me away from the fact I'm pretty much failing to have a relationship,

I'm on Tinder and various other sites but I've come to notice, and read that its just on looks basis, nobody gives a damn about anything else, I've had a few matches, 3 were just scams telling me to sign up to a website for a "show" ... one was somebody just to take the piss.

At work, I do try to speak to females, but it just somehow ends up with me being insulted, like I literally just said "hello" which was met with a range of insults to "I wouldn't want to sleep with you even if you were the last guy on earth" to "I have better standards than you" .. all I said was Hello? I know I have barely any confidence, but that's taken a hell of a lot from me.

It's come down to the point that I've asked, (begged) for somebody to set me up with literally anybody, which again has been met with a sea of no's, even with the offer of money to help.

Honestly, I don't want much, just to be wanted and loved, so I feel valued, needed and not lonely. I don't know what else to do, going out on a night out is my last option but with who?

How has something so easy become so hard? Many of the people I know have cheated/are cheating on their partners, which gets me quite upset because I know deep down how happy I'd be for just one female to want me.

How can I grow in confidence when nobody wants to speak to me at all? It's effecting my day to day life, I have started to hate everything that can be associated with having a partner, for instance Christmas, giving gifts, buying her whatever she wanted, I want that.. yes I'm aware you will all think its stupid and pathetic.

There is so much I've not yet experienced, or done yet, I'm starting to believe there is really something wrong with me, it has to be the way I look because that's the first/only thing you'd know about me from the second we spoke.

I doubt anybody will get this far, but if you have thank you for listening to my rambling mess about how I've never had a relationship, and struggling to find a female just to speak to, let alone date.

I'm just a nice, quiet guy who will listen to anything you have to say, NEVER judge on anything, who will just do everything possible for you to smile,

Sigh, I can't believe my life has turned into this mess.

I don't think it was a wind up.

He's basically asked for help and advice, somewhat desperately, and been slagged off for being a weirdo, using the word 'females' (which I've seen plenty of women use - it's a bit awkward but not misogynistic) and told that he's a sex pest. Obviously he has social issues but it's been fairly consistent character assassination.

If I were him, I wouldn't post on here anymore either.

I've been here for a very long time and I haven't seen posters, female or not, use the term in the way that the OP did.

good, I hope he does go.

This site is not 'better' for the influx of 'confused gay teen', 'strange single man with no kids' or any of the others who come on to have their egos stroked by silly women. ;)

Agreed, Hodd

Op has vanished I see.

I thought the "user" usernames were randomly generated for new sign ups so don't see how he can be an avid member of the site.

Stop calling women "females" for a start.

FWIW. I don't think he is/was a wind up and the use of the word females in a mans mind isn't that offensive to a man but it is to this group. I sometimes used the word ladies and that has caused offense in some circles too, so we modified the behavior;!

So here we have someone who is in a very desperate situation and I have over time known some like him they just don't seem to be able to attract or pull a woman 'scuse the wording. Of course desperation is the best way to repel any woman around. And nice can be much the same i know someone who is a very nice person and he's a real PITA! if i were a woman i'd be off to them thar hills PDQ;!

I very much expect he's here to get the opinion and advice of these "strange aliens" in his mind as he sees them and he has been from some posters, derided, shunned and criticized but from some other's been given very good and valuable advice too:)

I'd ask a question if any woman poster here was him where would you turn for help and advice as oddly as you might word it?

And we have had others who I think were genuine they to have been treated much the same as I'd expect they would from the mixture that we are here!

Also agreed Hodd.

Justaboy I'm unable to resist the urge to challenge you this time. Our paths have crossed many times on here and I find some of your opinions and the way you express yourself to be particularly irksome at times.

the use of the word females in a mans mind isn't that offensive to a man but it is to this group

this group ? You mean 'women'?

There is no reason to ask to be excused for using the term "attract a woman". That's normal.

I know several nice men. 'Nice Guys' are a very different matter.

And to answer your direct question. There is nothing wrong at all in coming here and asking the question (I know that not everyone agrees with it) but I think that if your wording of the question is so universally offensive, then you might have the answer to your question anyway.

Aww, Just. I thought you were starting to improve 'n' all

Well I'm much clearer about the OP now it's been mansplained, don't know about anyone else. Thanks awfully Just

I remember you OP - changed username or not. The issue last time was your seeming entitlement to women and lack of respect. From your post I don't think these things have changed...

The OP seems desperate as fuck.

Not a good look at all and I'm a bit at the language he used.

He needs to take a few steps back and chill out, begging people to set someone up with him screams entitlement.

Entitlement, or just watching too many Hollywood films in which an intelligent, stunning woman is forced to spend time with a man who is unattractive in multiple ways, and though initially repulsed soon falls (for no apparent reason) under his spell.

The post mainly made me wonder if OP is on the autistic spectrum.

Well I'm much clearer about the OP now it's been mansplained, don't know about anyone else. Thanks awfully Just

Definitely mansplaining and a touch of othering with 'this group'.

He's gone hasn't he?

Why do these men always write their posts like a novel?

My guess is he was hoping for some simpering 'female' to take pity on him and think he sounded oh so sensitive and loving. 3 PM's later no doubt the cherished dick pic would arrive

Tweasels, I'm on another discussion board that is mostly men. I've never seen them write posts in that "why use two words when twenty will do" way - but there seem to be a few male posters on MN who do that. So does my dad, I think he thinks it makes him seem more important.

Your dad is on MN Lorelei?

Sorry Boundaries, I meant he talks that way IRL.

I know Loelei, I was just being silly

I think you're right, about the making themselves feel important - I think there's a dose (on here, with some male posters) of deliberately trying to phrase things in a way they think "females" will like/respond to. Rather than y'know, just talking to "us" as though we're people.

That'll be why they write as if they've never spoken to another human being in their lives?

Trills

Indeed Trills.

Boundaries I think you're spot on with that. They write as though they are addressing 'females' rather than women/people.