Just discovered DW has been cheating on me

[SleepingTiger]

All I said a few weeks ago was I prefer healthier food to chocolate these days. Of course, DW thinks I am talking out of my American ass.

Go to have one of my Ferrero Rocher's and they have all been eaten and replaced with mini falafels, carefully wrapped back up in the gold foil.

What would you do?

Give them to her for Christmas wrapped in a big bow

That's assuming she makes it to Christmas Patricia.

This means war.... Pranking of the highest level is in order

Your DW is a genius!!

She sounds fab. I'll take her, and swap you mine.

She is also good a moving furniture and painting the house so i'll want paying. I am very partial to mini twiz and charbonel champagne truffles

Yes Marbles but sadly mine developed the house, organised the builders, painted it, designed, bought the furniture, installed it, painted the house again, mixed the concrete herself, laid the floor in the outbuildings, then went and bought a dress in the knock down sale for £10 and looks a million dollars in it.

So not for sale or swapping.

But I will swap you my, ahem, Ferrari Rochels, for your Charbonel's?

Whoa......just realised what you meant!

You're swingers aren't you...!

Stay sweet and calm for 24 more days...and then present chocolate covered Brüssel sprouts on the 25th. Disguised as a box Dairy milk.

The piece of paper with the flavour assortment printed on it should be swapped for Divorce papers...

Practise your cockney accent and upon opening the chocs shout..."I'm leaving yer, you caaaaaahhhhh!

Cue Eastenders theme...

This is brilliant.

Totally agree with pp on the sprouts in chocolate.

I would also look at joke divorce papers on the grounds of chocolate hording and swapping. A nice pre Christmas present.

Now idea where you got the swinging reference from!!

Of course the absolute best revenge would be to buy her American chocolate...

This has cracked me up today.

Of course the absolute best revenge would be to buy her American chocolate...

This ^^^^

Or...

And Idea for next year...
Sprout Advent Calendar

Get these. Suggest re-packaging so the fact there are 6 nasty ones is not apparent until tasting.

www.amazon.co.uk/Festive-Chocolate-Sprout-Roulette-Game/dp/B01LW4ZM10

So, this weekend my options for revenge are;

1. Replace the falafels with proper Ferrero Rocher's enjoy them in front of her and pretend it never happened and see how she reacts. I can be a good actor when I want to be .

1. Say "Hey, a new healthy type of confectionary" bite into one and collapse on the floor convulsing, pretending I am allergic to chick peas.

1. Get my friend, a solicitor, to pen a letter on their letterhead dated tomorrow defining "Unreasonable Behaviour" as per some Matrimonial Act citing some fake Cases dealing with such pranks, and leave the letter lying around on the kitchen side tomorrow night. Said friend would even pop round for a drink at 7pm which would add to the authentication.

Votes please !!!

I vote no.1

deffo

2!

2! Video though or it didn't happen 😁

First one to 10 votes gets it.
Promise I will come back and post over the weekend, but no video. That would be too identifying how do I do that and upload that I am no geek just a dinosaur

Send her a Janet and Roy christmas card?

Or 3. I like elaborate pranks. I've a great one lined up for my mum.

1

Vote 1. I would also offer some to her and watch her face.

1