DRY 16

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If you're quitting alcohol for a brighter sober future come and join us here. A very welcoming bunch supporting each other every step of the way.

Link to Dry 15

http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2726334-Dry-15?msgid=65047780#65047780

wow violets, that IS a tale. I can only imaging the feelings you'd had last Sunday. Arguing over who owes who a cuppa sounds beautiful. I think it was yourself who had been saying 'look after yourself first and foremost' or something similar'ish and I've been doing just that. Keeping everything 'on the low', not engaging with anything that could lead to a dispute, not looking up or down just v immediately in front of me. And of course eating tonnes of comfort food!

So far this week I've not even been tempted to have any alcohol, but am busy seeding the thought in my brain " you know how to start but you don't know how to finish. so don't start." Having slight fluey symptoms ( I think as lungs get working properly) but will still get out for a bit of a trot. And plan to ride my bike to work tomorrow.....ha!

Whatever, when I gave up the drink I told close family etc, - the rerason being this would make it harder for me to start drinking again as I would get the "couldn't even stay off it for...." etc

The other way I was able to do it was with Sober October - another reason for not drinking, I then sort of just siad I had my fill of drink, couldn't deal with the hangovers , and the feeling of nervousness the next day etc.....sorry it won't be as easy to do that in December, but there is always the thought of Sober January?

I'm on day 82 now, although I have to admit that this week (with a few stresses etc) has been the first week that I had been thinking of taking a drink, I haven't though and won't be

New mantra: sprouts good, jelly babies bad.

Sounds a lovely day whatever I love holiday planning. I'm also not a regular drinker. But when I do drink i put away prodigious amounts and will rarely make it to 10pm I've missed the first dance at the weddings of my closest friends and family members, and last NYE i can't recall my friend announcing her much longed for pregnancy at midnight. OH had to retell me the story the next day. That one particularly hurts if I think about it too much. It helps to know I have made a positive decision to not drink today so it can't happen today.

nottoday love the idea of only looking immediately in front of you. One step at a time.

Well done on resisting temptation user. It's not easy but nothing worth doing is.

Dec probably the hardest month to give up but I do work most weekends so that can be an excuse to say no. Well done user getting to 82 days, thThat's amazing! Violets I have shown myself up on many occasions, but now think I'm 39 and need to get a grip of this. I wish I could have a few socialable drinks but I can't. I felt so low for the first few days of this week after Saturday and thought why do I keep doing this to myself?! That's why I wanted to wait until I managed 7 days before joining here. I think to show myself I'm serious this time. Anyway enough about me. How's everybody else's Sunday going?

Oh well done everyone! There are some truly fantastic achievements on this thread it's amazing :)

Day 75 for me and the longest I have ever done. I am well known for a drink and everyone we know and socialize with drinks so this has been a bit of an eye opener for everyone including me. I gave up smoking a few years ago and that was also a bit of a shocker for a lot of people, because I was the biggest hardcore smoker out of everyone I knew. Unusually we know a fair few smokers and often in a social setting there would be 6 out of 8 of us smoking or at a girly get together there were 3 or 4 regular smokers and a couple who could handle smoking on a social situation but I was the CONSTANT smoker, I was the one who would smoke through illness, wake up first thing in the morning and have a smoke, last thing at night etc etc. Most people were therefore quite amazed when I actually gave up for good and I think it has definitely resonated with a few other people thinking well if she can give up, ANYONE can.

So back to the drinking, I think again I have surprised a few people because there wasn't really any big reason (well other than knowing I drank too much), I hadn't embarrassed myself socially (well no more than anyone else in my circle), I hadn't had a particular wake up call or whatever, it wasn't dry January or any of those things, I just sort of stopped. In my own head I had been on this thread for some time and had done various 20+ days earlier on in the year and had started the year thinking along the lines that I wanted 2016 to be a year where I drastically reduced the number of days I drank. It got to the end of the summer holidays and I realized that I hadn't achieved as much as I had hoped so far in 2016 and had been toying with trying to do 100 days for some time. I didn't tell anyone that and just kept it all to myself and took it very much one day at a time for quite a while. Once I got nearer to 50 odd days I started telling people that "I was TRYING to do a 100 day challenge but had made no promises to myself, it wasn't for any other reason than to lose a bit of the quitting smoking weight gain prior to Christmas and if I didn't succeed then no biggie".

I am nearly there with that, and after the 100 days I don't know yet, again I make no promises to myself or anyone else yet, just taking it one day at a time.

I am amazed by peoples reactions to me telling them, most people I have come across ask "Do you feel better for it" so that leads me to think that most people ask themselves why they are doing it.....I am also surprised at the number of people who I would consider very light drinkers who are obviously not!

Don't mean to sound flippant or that it was easy....

There were things of course. My memory was getting worse and worse and I often couldn't remember going to bed or the end of the TV show or that one of my children had reminded me they needed something the next day and that really worried me and I could tell my husband was getting a bit exasperated as I looked blankly at him. Then there was the weight, the bloatedness, the feeling awful the next day, the paranoia about my breath stinking of stale booze, the list goes on....

I can identify with a lot of what you have said lou. Sobriety is a much better way of life.
Today I had my lie in, made pancakes, took DD to a party and DS to the pet shop to look at animals. Batch cooked some tomato sauce and cookies for the freezer then had family to visit. Looking forward to a quiet evening tonight a bit feeling 100% but at least I won't be drinking through it!

That's great lou getting to day 75. Only 25 days until you reach your 100 day goal. Still early days for me, so doing one day at a time. Day 9 tomorrow so let's see what that brings 🙂

I can only dream of 75 days. That's aaaages away! Am sure though it will come round. Big up lou.

Still bunged up and chesty with stuff. I'd simply refuse to go through this again. So this is it. Grim determination and all that jazz.

But it's a week gone! Day 8 tomorrow. Well I never. December does present as poss tricky doesn't it? I have works do and a visit to the Christmas Markets with that lovely smell of gluvein to face. And Christmas stuff. But I feel remarkably calm about it all. I'm pretty sure I can smell the gluvein, watch others enjoy it, and plump for a coke.

nottoday do you like hot drinks? I'd rather an indulgent mint hot chocolate or posh coffee with cream over gluhwein any day

Belvoir Christmas Spice Mulled cordial. Smells and tastes like mulled wine. Its delicious!

Thanks both! I will look to getting them for the Christmas period - gluvein-sniffing could be a bad idea.

The Ribena Winter Spice is gorgeous hot too (though less grown up and glamorous than belvoir!)

Happy Monday all.

gluwein

It isn't Manic Monday, is it? It's cool, measured, unhurried Monday.

Hey all just checking in. hurricane thanks for the shout out, yes I'm still here and still sober, Day 335 I think? While 2016 has been such a Bad year in so many ways, for me it's been quietly wonderful. Sober Sarah thank you for listing and linking to all of those resources, a few pages ago, that is incredibly helpful. Do you think we should cut and paste that and have it at the top of each new thread? For soft drinks look no further than Bavaria 0% alcohol free lager, can get it in Sainsbury and it's only 26 calories or something. Brilliant efforts everyone I love to hear about people's different strategies x

Hello...

Long time lurker.... but today I have made an appointment with the doctor to ask for help with my drinking... there, I said it out loud.

Feeling a little overwhelmed, very emotional and a little optimistic...

I know it's what needs to be done, but it feels like a long road currently...

But I have to do something, and nothing has worked so far - I think seeking help will make it more real, more serious.

Only told one person so far, but have been hinting to a few others for a while and quite sure that many more will know...

Will be a sobbing mess at the doctors tomorrow, but hopefully can start that long journey.

Actually i'm terrified, and crying as I type...

One step at a time.............

wow absolute 335 days is truly amazing. Enormous congratulations I bet you feel wonderful knowing you have come so far, even if it hasn't been the best year in other ways. When I am sober I find the bad stuff much easier to cope with, and when I am drinking even little things come as massive curve balls that throw me right off track. So grateful today for my sobriety.

Welcome BGJ this is a wonderfully supportive thread of people who have been exactly where you are right now. Someone with wiser words than me will come along but for now, take all the time you need to cry and let it out. Keep it safe and slow and don't think about the long road ahead - just the next day / hour / minute.

Hi BGJ, what a brilliant and beautiful person you are, and that is even when you are drinking, just think how much your life is going better, all because you have decided to stop putting poison into yourself every day.

One day at a time is a mantra that you hear all the time, but the thing about it is that it works - every journey starts with a first step - and you have taken yours! Remember it's not a race, because in the human race of life im not sure that seeing the end is a good thing.

I have been told numerous times, don't take the first drink, if you don't take the first drink you can't take the third/sixth/tenth etc.

If you don't take that first drink then you can't get drunk, so the only drink in the world you have to worry about is that first one.....no need to worry about all the wine in France, all the whiskey in Ireland etc, all you need to worry about is not taking the first drink.

I am an advocate of AA, the reason being for the last 82 days it kept me sober, other people use other methods.

One thing I will promise, life is easier without drink. Not drinking won't solve your priblems, but drinking won't solve them either.....being sober makes them easier to navigate though.

Welcome BJG. You are in the right place. This is a wonderfully supportive blog.

It's great that you have made an appointment with you GP - a huge and very brave step. I would suggest writing down what you want to say as you are likely to be upset and it will probably feel overwhelming. Also be completely honest about how much you are drinking. I lied for a long time even when I had decided I needed help. I am sure your GP will be supportive but sometimes I have found they suggested I did not have a "Real" problem. You don't have to be drinking a specific amount for it to be a problem. If you think you have a problem that's enough, Don't be fobbed off. Take care of yourself. Rest if you can, warm baths, eat well but if you need sugar go with it. Keep posting here.

absolute 335 days is brilliant. Congratulations !!!

More tears... but also managed to make risotto for dinner at work tonight!!

Working til midnight, so that will help...

Good idea to write things down, knowing myself I will be sobbing to the point of barely being able to speak...

0850 appointment so no time to chicken out in the morning - up and out...

Thanks for letting me ramble x

Well done BGJ - good will come out of it.

BGJ, Ramble away, we have all been there, I think that is why this thread works

Afternoon all. I stumbled upon this thread this morning by pressing 'active'.

I'm on day 3. I've done dry January for around 15 years with no problem. When I'm motivated to lose weight I can go without and generally I drink 4/5 days per week. My problem is that once I start I can't stop. It's embarrassing that we can't keep any booze in the house because I'll drink it. Now that my children are of legal drinking age, they occasionally have something that had been given to them as a gift such as vodka or JD. I don't even like them but once I'm drunk I hunt them down.

I find that alcohol makes me manic - most people seem to get tired when they've had too much, I just want to stay up and drink more. I've had I don't know how many blackouts over the last 30 years, I honestly think I've been very lucky to have escaped serious danger during my 20s.

My drinking has been creeping up - on a drinking evening I used to get through a bottle of wine. I now open a second and sometimes get to the bottom of that one too. I am getting fat. I am shit at getting things done. I'm probably drink driving some mornings. My mind is not as sharp as it was. I am wasting my life watching TV that I can't remember the next morning.

I wish I was able to have 2 small glasses of wine and then stop, but I can't so I need to stop completely.

Wine is a big part of our life and I feel guilty for spoiling that part of our life and I can't imagine life without it. Scary.

Thanks for listening