DRY 16

[vxa2]

If you're quitting alcohol for a brighter sober future come and join us here. A very welcoming bunch supporting each other every step of the way.

Link to Dry 15

http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2726334-Dry-15?msgid=65047780#65047780

Day 5. Bring it.
Still got that bushy-tailed feeling...

And I would guess a big happy smile too!!!

Chesil try not to worry too much - it just sounds like you are a bit anaemic. Whilst I am no doctor but I doubt you have messed up your liver from what you have said

People do love to scaremonger and of course we do like to wind ourselves up with Dr Google but I find this hysteria isn't really conducive to a calm mind which is what you need to tackle going dry. If you are in a wild panic it won't help.

The withdrawal panic/hysteria needs to be managed a bit better on this thread as well. Whilst it can happen to some people the majority of women who drink wine in the evening (albeit it far too much) are not going to suddenly have seizures and the DT's from quitting! From what you have said about just drinking in the evening you clearly don't fall into the category of people who have become physically dependent and need a medically managed detox.

Not belittling alcohol abuse in any way but just trying to be rational and realistic as scare tactics don't help anyone. Put google away :)

I am sure your doctor will reassure you when you see him/her.

Positive steps you can do for yourself is to go and get some multi vitamins and some milk thistle, eat well and lots of green leafy vegetables and rest.

100 days Gotta!! [halo

That is AMAZING well done to you xx

withdrawls - I've not really absorbed the 'panic' of these on the threads, but yes the need for medical interventions to manage these seem to be pretty hard core and not what we're talking about? Is that right??
For me, 'withdrawing' from nicotine and alcohol together has been uncomfortable physically - palpitations, sudden rise in temps, rise in blood pressure it feels - dizzyness from time to time, shortness of breath. The psycho bits have been challenging - anxiety mainly. So far. All of it overshadowed by the lovely feelings.
Obv withdrawl will mean differing things to differing people so it's hard to generalise, imho

Folks I think I'm one of the Ines who mentions withdrawal the most (more to newcomers than anyone else) - I wrote a post about it and usually refer people to go back and find it, the reason is two fold

1. Withdrawal is serious if people have been dependant drinkers -some were and don't realise they were - this gives them an awareness of withdrawal and the ability to take action/research more about withdrawal.

1. (Sneakily) it gets people to read the whole thread, or a large part of it, meaning that they are picking up tips, seeing what has tripped/tested others, but more importantly seeing how you ladies (and this gent) are getting happier without booze!

Day 80 alcohol free - one day at a time

Nottoday - a very small percentage of drinkers may need a medically managed withdrawal from alcohol. Generally these people are physically addicted rather than physiologically addicted. I have known if two people like this and both drank all day long. One had to have a drink in the middle of the night so would leave vodka in a glass by the side of the bed so he could top up in the night. Now whilst I accept that it can be dangerous to withdraw from alcohol cold turkey if you are physically addicted, in general terms most evening drinkers are not physically dependent.

People on mumsnet in general bandy around this fear that anyone who mentions they like to over indulge is suddenly going to keel over if they stop the booze and it is ridiculous scare mongering.

You are also clearly not someone who is going to keel over from abstaining!

Day 5 - wow I am super impressed! I have never managed that ever! You rock

By not managed that I mean fags and booze together!!

Been nearly 2 years off the fags and 72 days off the booze but couldn't do them together! Well done

Hi all,

I'm starting my day 13 reasonably positive ☺

Gotta 101 & counting...that's a fantastic achievement! Finnish biscuit eater, well done on 190! & thank you both for sharing your success - it's very motivating Lou, your cruising through your 70's too - great job
Aziraphale, how are you doing, your in your early days too?
Mnaddict, think you'll be celebrating 2 weeks tomorrow like myself? I feel up & down in my early days too.
Maudlin, I hope the work night out on Wednesday went well?
User, 11, nearly 12 weeks is great...so pleased for you 'sir' (sorry again for mixing you up)
Through the Violets - it's lovely to hear you feeling so positive congrats on 6 & 7 tomorrow!
Borage, your sounding great also, do stick around
Not today, well done on getting over your 4th day hurdle & I very much agree that really taking care of yourself helps in the early days x
Chesil, welcome to dry ☺ Im sorry that you got a shock from the Dr. I hope it won't be anything too serious. Sometimes a 'wake up call' although a fright can be an opportunity to take something positive from & I have found choosing to abstain from AL really rewarding. Hope your feeling ok today?

Wishing you all a safe and sober Friday

Hello everyone, I haven't caught up on the thread so am probably a bit out of step. I've been struggling not to drink since my Dad's death and funeral a couple of weeks ago. I didn't drink in the immediate aftermath as my panic levels were so high - it was an instinctive thing and not hard to stay sober at that point but as things have gradually stabilised, it's been much, much harder not to escape into a bottle of wine. I've given in a couple of times, not drinking huge amounts - yet - but I know it's only a matter of time. It's like teetering on the edge of something every day.

I'm back at home, my mum's health stabilised finally and I could leave her. She is however, coming to spend the winter in my house, and the only way I can cope with that - and whatever future decisions have to be made about her - is to be positive. And to do that I have to be sober. So here I am, trying again. I won't drink today.

agree lou re the MN exaggerations thing, but then ime EVERYTHING is exaggerated on MN!! Cigarettes and alcohol? Yes I found I couldn't mediate between the two - both cue each other, in my head, so they both had to go at the same time. So far soo good. It's just the grim determination, isn't it?
jojomo - difficult circumstances and I for one will be thinking about you and look fwd to you posting about how things are going? Lots of changes to be managed and booze isn't exactly a good assistant!

wondering where violets is. She's sort of my big 'dry' seesta! At least by a day. [smile[]

Hi all,

I'm really grateful for all the support & advice on this thread but I have a very strong (personal) opinion on the discussion of withdrawals also.

Alcohol is a disease which symptoms are described to affect a person in 4 stages. Only in the fourth and final stage will a person have developed such a physical dependency on AL to experience the 'DT's (Delerium Tremens). These are a potentially deadly kind of alcohol withdrawal that will usually affect the person immediately unless they receive receive alcoholism treatment.
No one suffering with stage 4 alcoholism should attempt to abstain from alcohol alone without RL medical support.
Although unrelated specifically to withdrawals stage 4 alcoholism is also accompanied by a chronic loss of control. The drinker will have difficulty holding a long term job & will have begun drinking earlier in the day. A choice that existed in earlier stages as to whether a drinker can take that first drink no longer exists. They need to drink to function on a daily basis. During the fourth stage, the alcoholic benders are typical. The alcoholic may become helplessly drunk & remain that way for days sometimes weeks.

I think discussing withdrawal in a vague context without providing fact isn't productive at all. Because someone considering they may have difficulty controlling their AL consumption & wishing to seek help may be frightened to do so by abstaining for fear of suffering 'withdrawal' of a 'non descript' nature which isn't helpful at all.

Although when the topic is brought up, I do not agree that it is sensible to minimise the seriousness of this stage of alcoholism & it is an inaccurate statement that this stage only affects a small percentage of alcoholics. Alcoholism is a progressive disease in that all persons who are suffering from stage 4 alcoholism with an inability to control their alcohol consumption/problem drinkers/alcoholics began at stage 1 and progressed through to stage 4.

I am thankful I never reached stage 4 alcoholism but I am under no illusion that I have the potential to deteriorate to that stage should I not choose to seek help & become alcohol free. Although this is very serious & quite a shock to learn - the more understanding I have about what I am fighting for & gratitude to be making that choice is very empowering. I will not let AL win.
LS

Am with you LS re the vulnerability of wandering/deteriorating to a Stage 4. My drinking was becoming sooo roboting and accummulative that I was breaking barriers and boundaries to the extent I didn't even recognise were there. I am hopeful that me or someone else would have said and done 'stuff' before I hit that stage but I can't claim any immunity from it. No-one can.

LS I fully agree that stage 4 should in no way be minimized. I have never said it should be minimized.

My points are getting misinterpreted and lost so will just leave the subject be now.

Good luck for the weekend everyone.

Jojo, so glad to see you back here, you have been through an incredibly tough time so it's no wonder you have slipped, please don't beat yourself up! Onwards and upwards towards a positive new start

I think everyone needs to preview their posts before posting, with a view of "If I am giving advice, does what I am saying offer evidenced based advice provided by substance abuse professionals in main stream support roles, or something else?"

If it is something else ( personal experience, other anecdotal evidence (even though very well regarded and well recommended as something that works) then people should say so.

All the links I have posted make this clear, one way or the other. As they should do.

We are a diverse group of people, with one aim - to get and stay sober. We have done this in a number of different ways.

In all cases if anyone is in any doubt about the effects of suddenly stopping your alcohol intake then do seek MEDICAL advice before stopping - not the advice of a group of (however well meaning) people on MN.

We are here for support, NOT a source of medical advice. My opinion but one which is echoed across MN and elsewhere in other support groups.

Well done Gotta .....and have a happy sober weekend everyone, whatever you have planned.

Thanks all. Feeling good. I'm meditating most days which helps with the rage when dealing with stubborn 3 year old and overtired stroppy 5 year old! Very tired but in a wholesome full of fresh air way of that makes sense. I forgot my tonic water this evening as I don't associate 6pm with needing a distraction from not drinkibg anymore, that's a great thing.
Time to sleep!

Evening all.
Can still do competitive sleeping on behalf of the western hemisphere. New developments are aching muscles and tight chest. Am suspecting this is to do with nasties making their way out of my body and kicking the furniture in a childish rage as show them the door. Or something like that!
Ans still eating rubbish. Now on a bag of jelly babies per day, getting the sugar in a different format. That's got to end. I'll just get fat until I explode.
Day 6 tomorrow. Bloody hell.

Hi all,

Sarah I agree we are all here because we want to become sober & maintain sobriety. My apologies for not referencing correctly but the information I shared on the 4 stage of alcoholism & how alcoholism is a progressive disease was provided by an addictions councillor to myself in 'hard copy' format (like school handouts!) So I can't provide Web links. I gained help from them through a charity based organisation. I don't really want to write on a public forum their name in case I'm outed because im not sure if it's a national or regional organisation but if anyone would like details I can PM them?

It was given to me in terms of information rather than as medical advice & don't think it came across like medical advice? I can write information on the other three stages if anyone wants but I thought that sharing the just the info on the 4th stages was relevant to the discussion. I was hoping that anyone who is reading/posting probably wouldn't be able to relate to the symptoms & effects of 4th stage alcoholism & hopefully provide a practical useful reference to alleviate any fear about someone might have about withdrawal.

I also shared it because I found it a useful tool in relation to my own personal struggles & tried to explain this.

Personally I feel there is a very psychological element of my alcoholism connected to secrecy, shame & denial which made it hard to admit I was alcohol dependant & frightened to seek help.

I think at an earlier point if I was worried about my level of drinking & withdrawal & asked for advice, if someone explained these worries as panic/hysteria or ridiculous scaremongering it wouldnt have alleviated my fears & I would have felt I couldn't talk about my fears & felt more isolated. It's only because I didn't think these were very supportive comments that I posted the information that I did. No-One should have their opinion, whether referenced, personal or anecdotal described in this manner whether new or old to this thread, it should be welcoming to all
LS

Hey nottoday waves! I'm right here, safe and sober and checking off day 6.

Feeling rather glum today after a very long week at work. Strangely enough the thought of looking forward to greeting a weekend morning bright eyed and clear headed is the only thing that's kept me going - not a gallon of Friday night wine. Think I'm in need of a good sleep and sure I'll be feeling brighter tomorrow.

nottoday how are you getting on?

Haven't read all today's posts yet.

Another day down, started off well for me and ended badly, Im doing all I can to try and resolve issues with DW and try and get our relationship back, I popsted on a thread here and people are basically telling me how much of a bastard I was, no insight into my wifes feelings etc, how I shouldn't be trying to get her back this early in sobriety.

I know I was a selfish prick when drinking and think that (although I didn't see it at the time) there was some manipulation and control, to allow me to drink. Im trying to repair the damage, have written a letter to DW and tried my damndest not to assign blame to anyone else, making sure that that I take responsibility and determined not toi use the word "but"

I don't know if I wrote the letter for DW or me....I think part of it I done as a therapy for myself....with the thought of giving it to my wife to let her know I'm working on the issues

Hope tomorrow (today) is a better day, bloody drink has removed so much from me and I just want to get it back

LS I didn't mean anyone in particular needed to provide full referenced links etc. Just that if what people say is opinion then they should say, whereas if it was advice from a GP then they should say that as well. That's all. And I agree about scaremongering not being helpful. :)

More sleep disturbance! Yay!
Fwiw user I'm suspecting it's bad netiquette to keep referring back to the contents of a contemporary thread. Esp when you are complaining about how other people are reacting to you on that thread.

I've appreciated your posts this week esp the one about things to look fwd to.

hi there violets - still here! Yes to the bright weekend mornings being something v much to look forward to. As above I feel like I am chucking out a whole host of unwelcomed guests who have been drunkenly partying in my house for years and they are bitter at being kicked out. BUT kicked out they are are being.

Hi everyone just marking my place, iv done 7 days sober. I really am finding it easy to stay dry during the week it's just on a sat night I struggle, iv got a plan for tonight tho bath cosy night in front of tv. Hope everyone is ok! X