DRY 16

[vxa2]

If you're quitting alcohol for a brighter sober future come and join us here. A very welcoming bunch supporting each other every step of the way.

Link to Dry 15

http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2726334-Dry-15?msgid=65047780#65047780

Vidorra No! Don't go there, you need to stay strong and look after yourself, not add alcohol as another health issue. But you know that. You know drinking won't help. Despite your name change I think you are my "buddy" in terms of time AF and we've had wobbles but are both still here. (Might be completely wrong there ! ). You need time and a clear head to let the news sink in and then you will be able to deal with the challenges. Tip the booze away. Hugs.

And hello to all the newbies, you've taken a difficult but very important step by joining us here. I think my sleep settled after about a week or so, and now I nearly always sleep like a log ! And I don't nod off on the sofa in the evening ! I get loads of stuff done early mornings.
User, Finnish, misscookie, really well done ! sorry can't name check everyone, spuds about to boil over... rock n roll here !

Thanks for replying patchwork I just feel so bloody low. A year ago I was running 15 miles at a time now it's all I can do to vacumn the house and be in pain the rest of the day. My poor dc miss out lately on so many things because of my back and I'm sure everyone is sick of me moaning about it. Happy fucking new year to me I am drinking coffee and smoking away now, lesser of two evils for the moment.

Ohh I have no idea I've been on and off this thread that often and nc that much. Plus my memory is shit

I think I will take your advice and chuck the booze. Maybe leave the crate of cider at my dads now to get it out of the way. Thank you

Hi Vidorra, if you sit and look at the situation can you tell me where the addition of booze is going to make it better?

I know a worry that I had (which is still ongoing) used to be forgot about with a bit of booze for an hour or two, but then it came back, made up for double and then left that wee seed of anxiety for me to add to the issue the following day. Now if a dr said that four bottles of wine a day would solve your back issue, I'd be handing you the glass and putting the rest of the booze on ice - but we both know drink isn't going to help it.

In AA there is the serenity prayer and I think it's good in all walks of life, if you want submit the word God with your first name ....

God/universe/vidorra/whatever the Hell you want,
grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference.

The thing with your back you cannot change, your attitude you can over time, and you may be able adapt your lifestyle for you and dc to cope with it and spend time together.

Thank you so much for the warm welcome everybody :) @Vidorra ty for sharing your story too, can relate so much. I too want to stop to be a better mum, I did function pretty well but school runs could leave me cranky as hell. It's such a difference when I'm a sober, I enjoy the wispy winter mist and sing along to the radio much to this dismay of my DS.

Sorry to hear you're having a tough time today. I've been injured from running for two years and know the loss you feel when you think about those long runs. Try to be kind to yourself, I keep telling myself that no matter what problems I've got, if I drink, I'll still have the problems plus I'll be back in the grips of addiction again. Tis a sobering thought. Don't know if that helps

Sorry to hear you're having a rough time of it vidorra. You don't need any of us to tell you that drinking won't make it better. What's your favourite comforting routine? Can you make your favourite meal, eat it whilst wearing your comfiest favourite pjs and watching your old faithful film that always cheers you up? Or go for a walk with a hot flask of tea to your favourite quiet place locally? Or play your favourite game, go for a run etc...whatever turns you on, just take the time for yourself to do it.

Thanks user, the serenity prayer is actually perfect right now, despite being an atheist, and made me blub again . Only thing I know alcohol would do is make me not feel the pain (physically and emotionally) given enough for a couple of hours but yes I'd pay for it tomorrow. Probably with panic attacks on top.

Thank you too monica, it totally sucks thinking back to the peace and calm exercise like that gives you when you can't do it. Amazing how the little things can bring you so much joy when you're sober, there's a real presence to it. My ds would has pretty much the same reaction to me singing

I've dropped off all my full bottles of wine and cider to the parents, they are back from holidays tonight so will appreciate it. I may earn daughter brownie points too The rest got chucked. Feeling a bit calmer now I know there's no booze in the house. Rationally I know I'd throw up if I drank tonight, already feel a bit queasy which is part and parcel when I get upset.

I feel a bit sick so probably no eating for the time being violets. There are some fleecy pjs, a good book and open fire with my name on it once I get the dc to bed however I'm going to phone dp shortly and talk it out too.

Keep strong Vidorra. Think how great you'll feel tomorrow morning when you wake up and remember you kicked the wine witch's arse. Well done you.

Cheers Rosey and considering all the alcohol places are shut now and not a drop is left in my house, I did kick butt

Seriously though thank you all you wonderful people. I truly mean it. I have no doubt without using this thread as a sounding board I would have just gone ahead and drank earlier As it is I did headspace and read my book and can now go to sleep happy in knowledge I'll be waking up clocking another sober day off tomorrow.

user that is the first time the serenity prayer has ever made sense to me. You inspired me to hunt out the card I was given in AA with it on it and pop it into my purse. AA isn't really my cup of tea but that did give me a different perspective.

It's also made me think tonight that I will have to make some changes. I've always felt like I had to be perfect in certain ways and never quite attaining the standards I set myself which in turn makes me feel like a failure. Maybe it is ok just to be ok? Do enough to get by without stressing out that it isn't perfect.

That's me over and out with the self pity and the me me posts. Up and on with it

KOKO folks

Vidorra I'm glad I was able to help in some small way. Aa wasn't for me for a long number of years either, but I suppose sobriety wasn't for me either!!!! I'm a great believer in doing what is right for you....if AA isn't for you don't go, I don't go to a gynaecologist because it's not for me!!!!!

Well done Vidorra! Day 4 today, slept 8 solid hours which has set me up nice for the school run which starts back this morning :) My temptation moments are going to be the weekends and any triggers (stress). Was wondering about attending AA, there are a couple of meetings in my area but I've always chickened out in the past. I think my brain thinks its going to be like that smoky room in Fight Club and I'm going to end up having to hug Bob. I'd prefer just to have the sponsor element than the group setting. I'm not a social butterfly at the best of times. :/

Monica try going to an open meeting first. - you don't have to talk or anything at it, and decide from there - a sponsor is not someone you choose lightly, you are best to get to know them first.

It's one of those things that you never know until you try. I would suggest ringing the national line and they can usually arrange for some women to either take you to or meet you at your first meeting - takes the pressure off a bit.

Oh and I know which meetings bob goes to - they aren't in your area

Hi
Just checking in to say hi. (name changer, not sure if I anyone "knows" me)

I have lots of nasty unexpected emotional shit hitting me at the moment and I am trying to look on the bright side that dealing with it sober has got to be better than drinking through it and storing up who knows what for later.

I haven't been on the threads for a while but it really is a supportive thought to know that there is a whole group of women out there steadily and determinedly not drinking. Some for months, some for years, some for days or hours. But NOT DRINKING

KOKO xxx

But poor Bob likes hugs I've actually read all of Chuck Palahniuk's books, I like a bit of weirdness with my novels.

Good going monica and I'm glad you managed to get some decent sleep last night. Although AA doesn't feel right for me, it's always worth giving it a try and to be honest I wouldn't completely rule it out for myself. I keep an open mind and I may decide to give it another whirl at some later stage. It does work for a lot of people.

I found the one I went to very welcoming and you don't speak at the first one and no pressure to any other time. The hardest part is definitely getting through the door the first time, I was shaking with nerves myself. You can arrange to have someone meet you before if you wish as user said.

Pretty good night's sleep myself. Was very restless with my brain whirling at the start. Put my meditation music on and I went out like a light. Noticed this morning how much calmer and patient I was with the dc taking their time getting ready for school and had a thought of how different that would be had I drank yesterday. I probably would have been hungover and cranky at them dithering.

Oh patchwork, it came to me who you think I am. Yes I'm one of those people as soon as I lie down to sleep random things pop into my head. Alas it is not me

Antigrinch, I'm sorry you're being put through the mill at the moment. You're so right dealing with things sober is far better than burying it with booze. It all comes to the surface eventually. I read the other day 'sobriety isn't about feeling better, it's about dealing with feelings better'. That stuck with me as I have frequently used alcohol as an emotional crutch when it gets too much. I hope things pick up for you soon

Vidorra, sorry to hear your news about your back, but I am so pleased you didn't pick up last night. There is no way you would be feeling so positive today if you had have done. A drink wouldn't have changed your back situation as you know. Another little victory under your belt, you can get bad news and not drink, who knew

Hope everyone is okay, I am on day 7 again unbelievably - it has just whizzed past and both husband and I are really glad to be back in our groove and routine of not drinking, we much prefer it. I am so happy we didn't slip right back over Christmas time...

Sleeping is great again but I was shocked how out of kilter just a few days of drinking over the holidays has made me

What was weird was speaking to a couple of people on the phone last night, they are both regular drinkers like I used to be (get me ha ha!) and it was sooooo obvious in their voices that they had been partaking and all I could think was thank god I am not a slave to that anymore....bizarre how things change. This time last year I was in full battle mode to fight the witch and it was extremely hard to stop and make it to 23 days, I think it was because I didn't want to quit but now I really do - it's my choice and I am not doing it because I think I should etc.

I read a quote yesterday which struck a chord, going to go and see if I can find it and will post it but it was along the lines of "If you are sitting waiting for someone to turn up in your life and change it in 2017 you will be disappointed. There is only one person responsible for your life and that's you" now I know this is pretty bloody obvious but about 4 months ago I did just sit and think for goodness sake can you please stop moaning on and on about the same things = weight and drinking! They go hand in hand and it finally sunk it that yes really, there is only one person who can change my life (I swear I am an intelligent person really!!)

KOKO everyone X

Hello everyone and hope you are all well this fine and sunny afternoon (well it is here)
user lol at the "I don't use a gynaecologist comment" :) that made me laugh :)
vidorra well done for not drinking xxx
Finally the chest infection I've had since before Christmas is lifting :) managed to go swimming today :)

Glad you're feeling better Sarah

Well I suppose I have to get up and on with things Lou. No time to wallow with two lo to contend with and oddly there is a teeny, tiny bit of relief that at least I know now what is causing my pain. Now I'm over the initial shock I've given myself a shake. It's not the worst thing in the world, there are people dealing with horrendous situations and health issues. I have to make the best of it.

God, I know it's so obvious to me when other people have had a few, even over the phone. Glad you are feeling so postive yourself. It's exciting having more control over your own life and knowing you have the power to change it

Off to do headspace before bed and concluding my first double figures day today. Day 10 in the bag. Happy

Quiet in here tonight! Hope everyone is ok?

Quiet for a couple of days, hope the January slump hasn't sent anyone back on it?

Apparently January is the time most people start drinking again, think they have beat the Wine Witch as they staved her off over Christmas and then think they can drink normally.

She's s crafty lil bitch the wine witch

I am still here

Day 8 and feeling great! I heard that too User about people caving in January - I would never have thought that and it's really interesting...funny how our minds work isn't it?

I really thought this thread would be chocka block busy by now - really surprised by the lack of posts to be honest. I wonder where some if our fellow pre-Xmas posters are?

Those that might be lurking come out and say hi

Still here my fellow sober warriors! Day 5 for me. I'm keeping a sober diary and making a note of something each day that I've done which I wouldn't have done if still on the juice. Things such as read DC bedtime story etc. Little things but they mean alot. It's enormously satisfying ticking those days off!

Still here...day 47. Its true what they say about January being the time to fall off - tonight I am wrestling with deciding whether to drink on Saturday evening or not. No real time to post about it properly now but will do tomorrow. As for today...I am not drinking.