DRY 16

[vxa2]

If you're quitting alcohol for a brighter sober future come and join us here. A very welcoming bunch supporting each other every step of the way.

Link to Dry 15

http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2726334-Dry-15?msgid=65047780#65047780

Hi Moaning. - resident gent checking in. You are in the right place for some support. I personally have just over 16 weeks sober - the last time I had that length sober was before I was 18 and didn't drink!

I think a lot of us on here are heading for our first sober Christmas in a long time - I wasn't planning on being sober but Domestic situation guided me towards it.

I go by two things, one day at a time. I'm not going to drink, just for today, it breaks the issue down into manageable chunks.

The other is don't take the first drink. - that's the one that gets you, hooks you meaning you want more and more.

Hi moaningmyrtle and welcome

Hi all, just popping back for mutual support over Christmas. Day 220 for me, determined not to drink over the festive period, have been pouring drinks/ opening wine for guests and only feeling a slight pang! I think we've got this!

Hi moaning and welcome. Lots of support here and no judgement. It sounds like a good call you've made. Look forward to hearing more from you.

finnish good to hear from you. Well done! So far this month I have been to two carol services, work Christmas do, neighbours drinks, dinner with a dear friend and a work outing where someone placed a large glass of wine in my hand...oh and tonight came home to find DH tucking into a very nice Chardonnay. Seven occasions where in the past I'd have piled in.

Boy do I feel better for it.

Thanks for the welcome. 220 days is amazing finnish
I feel so sick. I have a really bad cold and I'm using it to my benefit. I couldn't drink even if I wanted to. I know I'll want a drink the minute I feel better so I'm going to keep reading this thread and the amazing strength everyone here has.
Thanks for letting me join in.

Hi all! I am out tonight but have stocked up on becks blue and AF fizz from Sainsburys!!

KOKO everyone :)

Day 34 here, must confess to seriously struggling though.. finished work early at 3pm and came home alone as OH is out for drinks in the city we work in. It's pouring with rain and was feeling so despondent and lacking in festive spirit - feels like the whole world is out boozing and socialising anyway I had a little cry now have put cheesy Xmas music on full volume and cleaned the house top to bottom ready for weekend. I will not be drinking alone this evening!!!!!!

Dont slip Violet - play the tape through til the end... remember how messy it gets, and how much better it is waking up without a hangover ....

Hi Ladies,

I was on the last thread briefly and have been working towards starting a booze free year for 2017. I did one in 2014 and although it was definitely good for me health wise I found it a tough year. Not because I wanted to drink (that passed quickly) but because my anxiety which I had under control prior to quitting drinking came back with avengance. I'm worried about it happening again and even now when I have cut way back to drinking once a week (although this month some of those weekly sessions have been proper full on binges - 15 to 20 units in a night) I am feeling 'off'. Anxious, jittery, waking a lot at night etc etc.

Has anyone else had this when giving up? I wouldn't say I was an alcoholic but certainly a problem drinker. Last year I was ok but this year I have built back up to near the levels I was before I last quit drinking (4-6 units a night, every night). Can I be suffering some kind of withdrawal at those levels?

Anyway I'll probably have a glass or two on xmas day, boxing day and 27th when I see my parents then NYE but after that I will stop entirely. I want to focus on my body and health next year - I'm heading towards 40 and am hugely overweight plus I feel tired and low.

Hope everyone is dealing with this time of year ok - will go back and read the thread now :)

Keep at it Violet you are doing so well. Well done for staying strong and distracting yourself. As lily says think about how wonderful it will be to wake up fresh and clear headed. Make some time for some self care tomorrow - just a bit of quiet you time if you can.

For me this evening would have been the start of five days of full on drinking. By now I would have had at least a bottle of wine with no inclination to stop. Tonight I've had virgin mojitos and Diet Coke. Early night and then a relaxing day tomorrow doing the last minute wrapping etc.

Waves to everyone xx

Hi titsy have you taken any steps to address your anxiety? I had around six months of counselling this year and it was the best thing I have done for myself. I still get anxious now but the joy of being sober means I know it is not alcohol induced which makes me feel better equipped to deal with it if you know what I mean?

Thanks lily. No booze here. Going to take myself off to bed soon and await OH's drunken return.

titsy welcome. Those symptoms could be withdrawal or anxiety or a mix of both and some more. My anxiety levels rocketed when I first stopped drinking and it has taken time to comeback down. I have always taken antidepressants but they never seemed to work that well (possibly something to do with drinking a bottle of wine each night and all the shit that comes with that !) Recently though I have really felt the medication is working. I have also had to learn how to deal with anxiety without my default solution, wine. This takes time but if you stick with it you will get there.

Once you have removed alcohol from the equation for a few weeks you should be able to gauge your anxiety better and how best to deal with it - with or without medication.

There are some good podcasts on the Bubble Hour which you might find useful. I will try and post a link. Xx

www.blogtalkradio.com/bubblehour/2015/08/17/rebroadcast-early-sobriety--am-i-ever-going-to-feel-better-1

www.blogtalkradio.com/bubblehour/2015/11/30/rebroadcast-from-self-medicating-to-self-care

These are both worth a listen. X

Thanks throughttheviolets and vxa2. I have been have counselling for about 7 years for the anxiety and have done the odd CBT session. Generally this keeps it under control now and only flares up a bit when I'm stressed (or just after a period of stress usually). The year I gave up drinking even 6 months in my anxiety was sky high to the point the CBT counsellor said she couldn't help me without medication as I was too anxious to cope! But the medications set off such big panic attacks I had to come off them.

Anyway I'm not going to let it stop me and fingers crossed just getting healthier and actually doing some exercise will help. If not I will reconsider medication but definitely not prozac this time!

Thanks I will give those a listen later :)

vxa I think we posted at the same time so sorry I didn't acknowledge your supportive post. I'm really proud of myself for having stayed distracted. I'd have usually been on a downward spiral into a five day binge too - but not this year. We have a lovely day planned tomorrow and the prospect of starting it with a clear head is the best Christmas present I could give myself!!

and festive wishes to all. X

Titsy have you tried hypnotherapy, it worked well for me. I have found my anxiety is generally better without alcohol. I was in a spiral of drinking to blot out anxiety then having horrible hangover panic attacks, which I "cured" with more booze.

I've had an interesting day today. Left home at 7am for a four hour journey to a wedding. Halfway there DD barfed so we had to do an emergency service station run for wet wipes. The service station sold wine. In my other life I would have deserved some stress relief. I would have bought the wine and a little bottle of water. Then I'd have gone into the toilets and drunk half of the wine. I'd have emptied the water bottle and filled it with the rest of the wine then hid the wine bottle behind the tampax bin. Then I'd have eaten a Locket to mask the smell. So clever little me would return to the car half cut with a secret stash and no trace of alcohol on my breath because of the magic of Lockets!

And from there I would have carried on and on until I was barely able to walk.

I didn't buy the wine. I went to the wedding sober. I stayed sober (wasn't easy). I'm in bed now and I'm still sober. It's a Christmas fucking miracle!

I've eaten a week's worth of calories in a day though so I might be starting a weight loss thread in January.

Hi folks, something happened last night that was really good for me I think.....something which would definitely not have happened if I was still drinking. I'm hoping that things work out for the best, but it's the one thing that was stopping me being happy while sober.

This might be a happy Christmas- but is def going to be a sober one!!!

Hi all

Day 96 here. A bit hard ( well a lot tbh) but off to bed sober. Hoping everyone else is feeling good and keeping on keeping on :) xxx

I am loving all these Friday evening sober success posts!!!
Through well done, welcome to your lovely clear headed Christmas Eve. Enjoy it. You've earned it
User ... Ooh, very coy .... looking forward to hearing more ...but very happy for you.
Rrrross I love your post. I'm so pleased for you. You did it!! It's a Christmas fucking miracle

Titsy welcome to the thread. Lots of advice and support here for you. There was a time when if I'd quit drinking it would have exacerbated my anxiety, because I would have been quitting for the wrong reasons and therefore, would have been very resentful iyswim.
I'd have quit to help deal with the anxiety as opposed to quitting because I really needed to quit the alcohol.
There is no doubt at all that the two go hugely hand in hand ....... but in my own personal experience, there is a degree of separation. Quitting the alcohol is the best decision that you could ever make. For me, the key was to embrace it and be grateful as opposed to resenting it. Boy, I am so grateful for my sobriety. It is so important to me.
The best piece of advice I can give you is to listen to the Andrew Johnson quit drinking app. I think it's also got a calming effect. There are a few of us long termers (it's 12 months for me on 28th December ) who have used that. I can't recommend it enough and I think it costs a couple of quid.
Put it on sleep mode, I never got to the end of it but it still works!!

Sobersarah I know .... but it's a tricky time for you. It's the tricky time that's hard, not the lack of alcohol. The lack of alcohol is a gift

Tricky times all round. I hosted a birthday celebration meal yesterday for my lovely daughter's 25th birthday. My lovely mum and dad came.
MIL was here too. Our relationship isn't what it used to be and there is a whole other threads worth to explain why. She even lived with us for 2 years which was a complete disaster .
Suffice to say, it's been a very challenging and at times heart breaking 5 years, with a situation that sparked it all involving my DSD who is her DGD.
Alcohol made all of it so much worse, it really did.
Anyway, like I've already said, it's the times that are tricky, not the lack of alcohol. I have no desire to drink and I put that down to three weeks of listening to that app at the beginning of my quitting alcohol.

Lily hi! Lovely to "see" you here. Looking forward to the piece on the radio
next Thursday. What time are you on???

Vxa great, supportive posts as ever. Me too!!! This weekend would have been a continuous binge fest that might have ended next Tuesday, but probably would have been right through to 2nd Jan

Hi guys and a very happy Christmas Eve. I'm hoping that this finds you all sober. The wine witch will be out in force the next couple of days. - don't let her win.

Thanks user. Merry Christmas to you too 🎄

I've been saved from Christmas Eve temptations by DS (6) pulling his pants down in the kitchen this afternoon and saying "Look what I noticed when I went to the toilet!" (two hours earlier!) There's a lot of swelling in his abdomen and balls, he's complaining that it's sore and he's walking like he's been riding a camel. I think it may be related to the hydrocele repair he had when he was 3. So we're in OOH for what promises to be a long evening. One of those times when I value being sober.

Hello my sober chums....

Day 27 here! But better than that is my liver function test came back as normal functionality - no damage done after 13 years of on/off binge drinking.... so very relieved!!

Doctor still keen to try the medication that makes you violently sick if you have a drink - I forget the name of it..... don't know if I was just being over sensitive.... he was also a little dismissive of me not having attended an actual support meeting - I did tell him I had joined a very supportive 24/7 online help forum, but he wasn't impressed!!

But it's worked for 27 days so far, so sticking with it...

No issues so far being at parents... although mum asking if I'll be having a drink at some point.... just said 'we'll see' - lovely and noncommittal!!!

Driving tomorrow so that's actually easier.....

Not feeling quite 100%, just incredibly tired/run down so sleeping a lot, and lots of fizzy water...

Keep the faith, we're all stronger than we think...

Love to all....

So, turns out mum has bought me a really lovely bottle of gin for Christmas - bought before she knew I was off the booze....

She then apologised, which has made me feel a little grim....

But we've agreed I might have some at some point in the future, which I might, I don't know...

Feel like I've disappointed her twice now - once for having to be on the wagon in the first place and secondly for her feeling she has to apologise for for what, 27 days ago, would have been a brilliant Christmas present.....