True with the one day at a time finnish, I am kind of taking it that way but have in the back of my head I need all the money I can get for Christmas, it's a good motivator. How are you keeping?
HALT, works for me and sometimes I replace the A for angry which is also a trigger of mine.
Yesterday I did something I haven't done in a long time and put my foot down with ex. He has decided to do something that will take a lot of extra time and asked to drop dc back early so he could do it. I told him no 
I rearrange frequently for his work, training, social stuff etc and have had enough. Told him the reason I can't take on extra activities is because I have the dc the majority of the time and that's the sacrifices you make.
It felt good to put myself first for a change. Some of my problem is I give too much to other people to my own detriment. I don't consider my own needs and end up burnt out, emotionally have nothing left for myself and end up reaching for a bottle as I feel so stressed and unappreciated. I'm going to start and be a bit more selfish 
Best of luck Half, I too feel like it's a good thing if I don't open the second bottle, like that's an acceptable amount to drink 
I spent a lot of time reading sober books on my kindle at the start before. Some distractions for night time help, I've done the odd spot of jewellery making, colouring in, knitting, learning a new subject through online courses, some exercise in the house if you can manage it once dd is in bed.
Well done Blue