Dry 15

[glad2016]

For all those sober, or would be sober, warriors. KOKO (keep on keeping on) lovely people :)

Evening all, hope you've all had another good sober day.

choc and one hope you've had a better start to your week than your weekends - read back over posts I'd missed, sounds like you've both had tough times - well done for keeping sober it can't have been easy but a major achievement to do so.

Welcome margaret and finding you've both took a massive step today even point here so be proud of yourselves. margaret that Fitbit has arrived with perfect timing ! It is indeed a new start and any sort of exercise you can clock up on there will keep wine triggers at bay and allow you to measure the improvements you're making. finding my situation was similar to yours - no drink in the week but binges every weekend. Until I stopped I can't tell you when me last sober weekend was. I can honestly say I have grown to love my new sober weekends - lots of sleep, good food and exercise - no more self loathing, anxiety and shame. you can do it !

Just woken up from 12 hours sleep! I could sleep more tbh. Feel like I've really given myself a battering with alcohol.

Work today although I've got a bit of time to myself this afternoon. Downloaded Headspace so that would be a good time to try that.

Thanks again to everyone here How are you today Finding?

Welcome margaret and finding and congratulations on taking the first brave step to a better sober life. The support here is wonderful. Post as often as you need - that's what we are here for.

Well after over 6 months sober I had a major wobble at the weekend. I really wanted to get drunk but I didn't drink. It was close though. I have decided I need more support in real life. I need to talk to people who have been there. As kind as my counsellor and friends are - the ones who know I have stopped drinking - they still don't understand what it's like. I have managed to find a group to try on Thursday and I am going to see my drugs and alcohol worker tomorrow too for a catch up. For those who don't know, I referred myself to my local alcohol service when I first stopped drinking. They were really helpful. If you are struggling or even if you're not it's really worth a try . I am so determined to stay sober.

Stocked up on some non alcohol drinks for the evenings today - bitter lemon and bitter cranberry with ice and lemon. Cooking tonight then magazine and early night, cinema booked in for tomorrow night and on my own Thursday so I know I won't drink (or miss it) until Friday. I'll think about planning for that nearer the time.

It's been fab today to feel sober if that makes sense.

Thanks for the welcome vxa2. Hope the support group works out. 😊

I haven't rtft but I'm on day 1 and bricking it.

Are you ok Boy? Try to read the thread. I'm new to this but there are lots of very wise women here!

Welcome boy - how are you this morning?

Welcome boy Are you ok ?

I'm ok. I think. Will read on my way to work.

Welcome boy just take it slowly and think about other things to do rather than drink.

Hi all I hope everyone is ok. Iv been busy playing nurse for dp he had a injury and now off work. So had a few good talks with him and he says he wants to be strong and stay of the drink. Iv been coping pretty well think his blip made me a bit strong. How are you one
not read whole thread but welcome newbies and congrats for coming onto mn for the support.

Hi everyone

Still here, still sober :)

Gots lots on at work, and still smarting from the relationship breakdown, but overall life is good.

Out to Yoga tonight - I'm realising that I'm not really missing drinking anymore, which is great. I am missing hanging out with people and being silly -- I just need to find new people who want to do that sober!

Hi all

Today is day three. I've woken with a headache last two mornings and my digestion is pretty shot which says a lot about how I've been treating myself I suppose. The new Fitbit has been a welcome distraction - walked lots (dog doesn't know what's hit her...😄); drank lots of water; found it much easier to eat properly. So that's good. Cinema tonight and driving so having a cappuccino whilst I watch the film.

I know that soon I will miss the act of drinking wine ( not the taste) but that's for the future.

Oh yes, the headaches! they were amazing - there is nothing like a detox headache to make you realise how toxic you were!

Try to take one day at a time - it's really easy to spin yourself out thinking too far ahead.

I gave up in May, by day 3 I'd thought:

'I'll never get through Christmas sober, I may as well drink tonight'

• I didn't drink, but it felt like ar easonable thought at the time - now I can see how silly it was to predict my own failure and then use that to help me fail!

• right now you're not drinking

Hi all

Big parcel of skincare arrived today. Going to try to resurrect my skin from rosacea and generally looking like crap. Woke up with no headache today but after a dream about DH buying me three bottles of wine. Hmmm.

I've unsubscribed emails from all local bars offering me free drinks this weekend - lots!; stopped emails from my local wine shop; stopped following my favourite vineyard on social media. It I've lost a bit of weight, feel ok and have been walking, walking, walking.

Day 4. Not drinking.

Hi lovely people, long term lurker and then poster but done a name change. On Day 17 of restart after a brief lapse. Doing it differently this time around, added in a Sober Jumpstart subscription to Belle, as well as all the other sober tools I already had. Being super aware about the pre lapse warning signs as I now recognize them and have them written down. Usually takes me about a week -10 days of pre lapse stuff before I actually lapse and have a drink ( or several).
So, watching out for signs of overwhelm and lessening of self care so I can be nicer to myself again and nip the lapse in the bud before it even happens.

Just thought I would mention this as it might be useful to others. Or maybe everyone else is a lot better at self care than I am :)

Hello to everyone and KOKO sober warriors

Margaret snap! I got a box of lovely stuff from Neals Yard today - I had a 20% off voucher and got some fab stuff with it :) My 14 day big sober treat, using some of the money saved by not drinking wine :)
My advice? Drink lots and lots of water. And then drink some more :) And herbal teas. It makes the skin so much better, flushes out the toxins and helps with the chronic dehydration we drinkers all have. it makes you pee like mad for a day or so then you get used to it :) Wee should be pale straw coloured if we are properly hydrated.

ooh another Belle fan! Waves hello at sobersarah x

still here and still sober. Going to be away for a few days from work and to be honest I am looking forward to it. I will miss the kids but I really need some space from DH right now: I can't seem to do right for doing wrong and it's as if he is constantly spoiling for a fight. He's critical, passive aggressive and petty. I'm just avoiding him because I don't know how to deal with it. It's like he is FURIOUS I am getting better - that I am sorting myself out. I am not sure why. Has anyone else experienced similar?

margaret you are doing brilliantly. I had the headaches, the exhaustion, the thirst - all that - too. I felt pretty crap and feverish for the first month and was convinced that my kidneys were packing in. Drink loads of water, eat your greens and get a multi vitamin in you. You're brilliant!

choc what a shame for your DH. Glad to hear that you are still feeling strong. You're a bloody wonder.

Welcome boy and sarah. x x

Welcome sarah great advice about water and herbal teas.

I am 190 days today and I am going to a support group for the first time tonight. I am really nervous but I feel like I need to be able to talk to other people who really get it IRL. I don't fancy AA and although there are some SMART Recovery meetings they are all in the middle of the day. There seems to be a real gap in terms of support on offer for people who work and/or have children. Anyway fingers crossed it will be ok

Good luck vxa2 - I know what you mean about wanting the support of other people. I met a friend for coffee this morning and shared a little bit of what was going on with me. Made me realise how lonely I've been - how much I've let booze isolate me, and how little I share with others.

My OH is being a bit PA and snappy with me. Yes, furious with me for getting better is about right :( I wonder if he is unhappy he has lost his drinking buddy?

That didn't come out right at all!
My OH is being a bit snappy and pa with me, yes. Not furious with me for getting better, he's delighted.
Bloody auto correct!
I do wonder if he is a bit unhappy, though, that he has lost his drinking buddy even though he has largely stopped drinking as well and never drank much in the first place, except if I suggested it ( and opened the bottle)
But we did used to go out occasionally and he seems to think I don't want to any more because there is alcohol around - I have put him right on that as I can drink lots of other stuff :)

Hey one - hope you have a good time away.

people can be really funny about change - hey, my partner of 9 years left me after 4 months sobriety - I think he struggled with loosing his drinking buddy...

But if the relationship has been - you drink, he puts up with it - he may be struggling to think f his new role - he also needs to readjust, and it's not in his control - it can't be easy for him.

But at the end of the day - he needs to learn how to deal with it - it's good that you're changing - but sometimes when we change that also means it's time to move on...?

Sorry - that feels like an incoherent brain dump - but I'm thinking of you...

Hi Sober, boy, vxa & glad

We weren't ever really drinking buddies - my drinking was too solitary and compulsive for it to be fun or friendly for anyone - but yes, he did mop up after me constantly and keep the house running, and now I'm doing much more around the house, and I think it's totally thrown him.

I also think there's a bit of him that kind of liked me being a fuck-up because I was there to blame for anything that went wrong in his life. These days, I can practically see him trying to find something to get pissed off with me about. I'm not saying I am perfect, but it's harder for him to blame things he doesn't like about his own life on my anymore.

I hope this settles down. Whether it does or it doesn't, I'm not drinking.